Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: This Game Isn’t As “Kid Friendly” As It Seems

Hey Dearies! I wanted to talk about this topic as my daughter is into gaming and some of the games she plays, I don’t see any issue with, however, there are some games that I thought were fine, but they really aren’t.ย 

Growing up, we had a home computer than our family would use daily, my mom would be watching us like a hawk when we were on the internet, if we were playing the many educational CD Rom games, she wouldn’t have to worry. However, once I was in middle school, I had a little bit more freedom to explore the internet.ย 

I completely understand why my mom watched us like a hawk whenever we were on the internet.ย 

Nowadays, kids have access to tablets, smartphones, computers, and gaming consoles that they not only can play games, but have access to play online with others. If you were like me and grew up with playing the Super Nintendo, we never really had to worry about “online gameplay”.ย 

However, you really DO need to worry. Especially, if your kids play online.ย 

Roblox

So, what started this was the fact that my daughter likes to play Roblox with her cousins. I signed up with an account to kinda check it out for myself just to see what the fuss was about.ย 

Well, once I started playing a few games, it seemed pretty harmless, but I jumped onto one server where this random person had messaged me saying I was ugly, I didn’t react because its literally a blocky character that’s your avatar. I honestly thought it was funny, however, depending how young of players you have on here, that could really upset them.

Ironically, I came across a video from this guy Visual Venture about Roblex. I got curious and watched it. It really opened my eyes to how DANGEROUS this game really is.ย 

Here is the video that I watched, any parents that have their kid playing Roblex, I HIGHLY recommend watching this:ย 

He not only breaks down some of the flaws about how Roblox can allow ANYONE to sign up and play, but how there are predators that have used Roblox to lure their victims.

Visual Venture talks about how the game is actually rating T for teens, but there are kids as young as 5 years old that are on this platform playing. The game was originally meant for players to create their own games and share for others to play, however, its not as sweet and innocent as you think.ย 

When I saw this article, being pissed was an understatement:

https://www.rollingstone.com/culture/culture-features/roblox-schlep-pedophile-vigilante-lawsuits-1235414218/

You read that right, Roblox BANNED a guy that was trying to get predators off the platform, after he, himself, was groomed online by a predator. You’d think that Roblox would want to work with Schlep, the one banned, to make their platform safer for kids.ย 

If you read in the article, there have been so many cases where Schlep has gotten justice for getting these real-life predators arrested, so that no other kids have to experience being groomed or worse abducted.

This is why I won’t let my daughter play Roblox.ย 


Now, Roblox isn’t the only game you need to worry about, anytime your child has access to the internet, you need to always have your guard up. We can’t always protect them when it comes to the internet, but we can teach our kids about using the internet safely.

Here are a few things to teach your kids about protecting themselves online:

  • Never give out personal information
    • This is pretty common sense, but definitely a very good reminder.
    • Think of the word “Yappy”:
      • Y – Your Full Name
      • A – Address (Home/School/Email)
      • P – Phone Number
      • P – Passwords
      • Y – Your plans & birthday
  • Keep your passwords safe
    • Having a family Password/Username booklet can be very helpful for this! (Especially if you are like me and have a few streaming services)
    • Make your passwords long or use a phrase to ensure that no one can get it.
    • Avoid using personal names/birthdays/or same passwords.
  • Don’t talk to Strangers!
    • Same if it was in person.
    • Only talk to those online, IF you have met them in person.
  • Tell an Adult if something doesn’t seem right
    • If something looks bad or seems bad, tell your teacher, parent, or a trusted adult.
    • Parents: Don’t get upset with them as if it happens again, they might not want to tell you if they get in trouble.
    • Best way to prevent them searching random stuff is having parental locks and only have selective websites from a trusted source.
    • This also applies to any conversation they have online with others.
  • Ask before you Download
    • Always explain to them that not every website can be trusted and that they need to ask before downloading anything.
    • I see this more as a problem for young teens who don’t realize that the free game they want could be a virus.
  • Always Be Kind!
    • Remind your child that being kind to everyone!
    • Just remind them that you never want to be rude or mean to anyone because you never know who is on the other side of the screen.

As parents, we need to do anything and everything to protect our children, as using the internet because more and more normal each day, its best to make sure our children are growing up knowing how to use it safely.ย 

Its just like them having cell phones at a young age. I didn’t have one until I was 13, the same age you’d need to be to sign up for Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, etc. We shouldn’t be pushing the limits and having our children have access to those until they really understand and know how to use them respectfully and are actually the correct age to be on them.ย 

Teaching them that anything you post, say, or do, you can’t just delete it and its gone, it will ALWAYS be on the internet in one form or another.ย 

ย 

Let me know in the comments what you think about all this!

(Yes, I did use AI to general the man photo, got curious to try it out!)

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: How I Dated a Walking-Talking Red Flag

Hey Dearies!

I know this post is overdue, but last year, I talked about how difficult it is to be single and dating nowadays and most of the red flags I ran into were because of one particular ex of mind. Now, since it’s been over a year since I last had to deal with him, I figured it was time to talk about how bad the relationship really was.

I’m not going to use his real name, so for the sake of this post, we are going to call him Ronnie or “Red-Flag Ronnie”, which fits him perfectly. Now, let’s get into this mess of a relationship that only lasted 3 months.

So, I first met Ronnie on Facebook Dating. I don’t remember who swiped on who first, but he was the one who sent the first message wanting to talk through texting. Which I usually have no problem doing, but looking back now, he didn’t want me to have his socials.

Anyway, the first day of texting, he really didn’t impress me right off. The conversation was going well until he mentioned wanting to do sexual stuff. To me, if that’s the first thing you want to have a conversation about when we just started talking, you aren’t looking for something serious.

Of course, whenever a guy starts the conversation out like that, I ignore them or move on to the next one. However, I decided this time to give Ronnie the benefit of the doubt, but boy did I know what I would be dealing with.

So, we continued to talk, and not even a week later, he was already asking me to borrow money. The first time was so that his phone service wouldn’t get shut off so we could still text and then it was “I don’t have money for food” or “I need a couple bucks to get me a vape pen”. Even though I was giving him little amounts here and there, boy does it add up.

Then we planned to meet for the first time, but he didn’t have a way to get to me unless he took the bus. Want to guess who paid for the bus ticket? Shocker, I know. I even had to pick him up at the bus stop too. Apparently, he totaled his truck and couldn’t pay to get it back up and running, but had his license.

Meeting him in person for the first time, I honestly enjoyed it and didn’t notice any other red flags at the time. Of course, we made it official, but when I asked if he wanted to make it Facebook official, he didn’t want to do it.

That honestly should’ve been another red flag, especially since the name that he used on Facebook wasn’t his actual name. Not to mention, he wouldn’t even friend me on Facebook, which I thought was also odd. If you were dating someone, wouldn’t you want to show that you are with someone? I mean, I do.

So, once we had the first weekend together, I thought everything was great. I waited until the next weekend I didn’t have my daughter, for him to come back down, but the second time he visited, he was glued to playing my gaming PC. All he did most of that weekend was play Rust, trying to get me into it which I honestly couldn’t do.

Pretty much you can guess that almost every time he came down after that, spent playing on my gaming laptop. I would even ask if he could spend time with me and when I was able to get him off my gaming laptop, he was glued to his phone. It was a nightmare getting him to do anything with me unless he wanted to do it too.

Then there was the time when it was a weekend we weren’t seeing each other and he randomly texted me that he possibly got someone pregnant. Now, I wish I would’ve dumped him right there and then. I don’t know why I didn’t, but he told me it was a “false alarm” the next time I was able to see him again.

Then he claimed he needed a place to stay because of his current living situation, his “roommates” were all moving out and so he asked if he could stay with us. I agreed as long as he got a job and was giving money towards the bills and food. This man, I swear you not, got a job and then quit a day later because he called out on his second day.

Instead of job searching, while I was working, he was playing on my gaming laptop all day and all hours of the day and night. Then would sleep, eat, and repeat. Until one of my family members offered him another job and he finally was working, but I had checked out of the relationship.

I think he could sense that the end was near because he even tried to get me to start looking at apartments for us to live in. I had told him no because I wasn’t going to be the only one that was paying for everything, especially when he couldn’t keep a job.

He even told me through text messaged that he supposedly loved me and got mad when I didn’t say it back. I only say the “I love you”, when I mean it and I would never do it in text message. I didn’t love him and I wasn’t going to say it back or be forced to say it back because he did.

When I had enough, I wrote him something, the one time he was actually working, explaining that it was over. I wanted to get all my thoughts on paper to figure out what I wanted to say. He kinda had a sense of that and asked what was wrong. All I told him was that I had written something down for him, and immediately, he asked “Is it a break-up letter?”.

I told him we could talk about it later since I didn’t want to mention it while he was working. He then kept asking and I finally just told him. Apparently, I made him cry at work over it. Well, you asked and didn’t want to wait until later.

It was pretty awkward when he got back from work and he read my letter. He sent me what he was feeling in a text message thinking that I didn’t want to be with him because he wasn’t rich.

First of all, I just want to clarify that I never judge someone by how their lifestyle is. I don’t care if you are rich or poor, its about how you are as a person. Clearly, my brain was not working when I met Ronnie, since he made himself seem better than he really was.

Once I ended it with him and he moved out, it was a huge relief not having to deal with him. He still tried to contact me and ask me for money, but I shut him down. I wasn’t going to keep stressing myself over it.

You also might be wondering, “Why didn’t he give out his real name?”. Well, this might answer a few things as well as the big one, why he couldn’t keep a job. Well, it turns out that Red-Flag Ronnie had a record. Now, I didn’t search his name when he gave it for his bus ticket, but if I had, I would’ve blocked him.

Turns out that when Ronnie was in college, he sexually assaulted someone. Which is why he doesn’t use his real name because if you were to search it, it pulls up articles that talked about it from a few years ago. Apparently, the case was still on going.

Ronnie did tell me about it, but he spun the story very differently than what the articles explained. He told me that he met this girl, and they hooked up, the boyfriend supposedly found out she cheated and apparently, the girl didn’t want her boyfriend to leave her and claimed that Ronnie assaulted her instead.

However, that wasn’t what the article said. The news article said that he threatened her with a knife, which he never mentioned. Mind you, I didn’t find this all out until after the fact, if I knew this, I would have ended things and blocked him right off.

Which explains quite a bit why he couldn’t keep a job and probably one of the reasons why women wanted nothing to do with him after they found that out. This is exactly why whenever you are dating someone, Google their full name and see what pops up.

Granted, a few other things happened with that relationship, such as him raising his voice at me and having angry outbursts when things didn’t go his way that were some more red flags.

In the end, I learned a few things and I now know if I attempt to go back on Facebook Dating, I know exactly what I want to avoid. I think one of the big things that I’m not going to do is rush into things. Nothing goes well when you rush.

I’m now at the mentality of “if something is meant to be, it will be.” I’ve also completely accept that famous quote Chandler Bing in Friends says:

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: The Dating World of 2024

Hey Dearies! I wanted to bring up something that I’m having trouble with, but some pointers I wanted to bring up if you are a newly single. Whether your a single parent, just got out of a long relationship, or have been single for awhile, but just started looking, this might be good information to know!

Now, for all of you who have been following me since the very beginning, I decided to leave my children’s father back in 2021. I didn’t start dating again until 6 months after I had left him. A lot of people asked why I didn’t just jump right into and it was because I wanted to work on myself.

I wanted to make sure that I loved myself before I jumped into another relationship. However, I felt like I had to start putting myself out there. I also had a few people that were pushing me to get out there as well.

I was expecting the dating world to be back before I first met the father of my children. Back when it was 2014. Oh no, things had really changed this time since I first went back on dating sites.

First, Facebook had a dating part that they had added and that’s where I first started. I met a few guys that I had really great conversations. Most of them would ghost me or never talk to me after saying ‘hello’. Other guys weren’t really there for meeting anyone to build a relationship, just hook ups. Then there were the few guys that actually caught my heart and shredded it down to practically nothing.

At the end of 2021, I did find someone I really started to fall for and started dating him. I’m not going to go into complete details, but he was the one that got away. It also didn’t help that life happened and I didn’t really know how to handle it. We tried rekindling it back last year, but he had his life that he had a lot going on.

Anyway, I decided in March to give this dating thing another try and this time my walls would be up no matter what. However, I still have hope for that one guy he will come running back into my life so we can try again, but as the saying goes, “If you love someone, let them go. If they come back to you, it was meant to be, if not, it never was.”

So, nowadays, I’m focused on building a friendship with some of the guys I’ve been talking to. I don’t want to rush into anything and I know what I’m looking for, but I am keeping an eye out for the red flags.

Here are a few Red Flags you should keep in mind:

No Job or Can’t Keep a Job– This is a HUGE red flag. My more recent ex had this issue and I lost a LOT of money because I was supporting him. I learned my lesson on that. Even if they wanted to borrow $20 bucks here and there, don’t do it. Trust me, it adds up faster than you think.


No Car/No License– This is a red flag for me because I live in Maine and in order to go anywhere, you really need to have a car. I have nothing against those that don’t have a car or license, but please don’t date people just because they will cart you around.

It’s one thing if you are taking an Uber or taxi to meet up with them, but it’s another thing to demand them to bring you here or there. Keep this in mind, the first time you tell someone you will give them a ride, they will always think you will give them a ride.


Separated/In a Open Relationship– This one is tricky because all situations are different. I feel that if you still are married, you shouldn’t be dating until your divorce is final, but that is just me. I also am not a fan of “open relationships”. I know that people’s opinions have changed on that, but I’m against it completely. When I’m in a relationship with a guy, I don’t want him to share me or me to have to share him.

Nothing against those who are in an open relationship. If it works for you or for your situation, great! I don’t think I could handle it very well, emotionally.


Love Bombing – I didn’t even know this was an actual red flag, but it is! I really hate to bring it back to my more current ex, but he did the same thing to me. Pretty much all the time he would call be “beautiful” to the point that the word meant nothing. He would also use this whenever we got into an argument, he would change the subject into complimenting me instead of talking about the issue at hand. If you don’t know what “love bombing” is, it is when someone frequently attempts to influence another person with over-the-top displays of attention and affection.


Not Respecting Your Bountries – This is a huge red flag, if they can’t respect your bountries, that shows that they have no respect for you. Granted, in the beginning of a relationship is learning what each other bountries are. That is why if you let them know what your bountries are at the begining, you can tell right away if they will respect them or not. I had an ex that got mad at me for hanging out with my best friend for one night, just because I didn’t include him.


They Want You To Always Put Them First – If you have children, you would understand that when it comes to a new relationship, you and your kids come first. It brings us back to situtation I talked about before. That ex wanted me to put him on the thrown, honestly, he is in most of these red flags, I should just write about how awful the experience really was.


Talk Badly About Ex’s/Or Still Talking To Their Ex’s – So, I can’t say that I haven’t talked badly about an ex since as you can see from this post, however, I’m not one of those that goes onto the internet and blasts them by name. If they can talk badly about their ex or say all their ex’s are crazy without explaining why, that is a problem to be aware of.

What is even more of a red flag is still talking or being friends with an ex. Depending on the situation, I will keep an open mind. If you have a baby daddy or baby mommy, that is a different situation since you are communicating about the kids. That’s the relationship I have with my daughter’s father, its strictly about our daughter.


Drug/Alcohol Problem – This is another huge red flag to keep in mind because they will tend to put their “habit” first. There’s nothing wrong with having a social drink every now and then, but if they need it constantly or all the time, that is a problem.


Bad Feeling/Gut Feeling – You know your body better than anyone else does, but if there is something off or fishy about the person you are talking to, trust your gut! Most of us want to listen with our hearts or heads, but sometimes its better to listen to your gut first.

If you aren’t sure, talk about it with friends or family. They would be the first one to notice the red quicker than you would. Especially, if you are so into them. You don’t have to listen to them, but its always good to get a 3rd party’s advice of the situation.


No Social Media/Different Name for Social Media – Okay, so this one isn’t really a red flag, but it really depends who you ask on this. My last ex had a different name on his Facebook. I really didn’t think anything of it until I found out there was a bigger reason why he didn’t give out his full name. It’s okay for someone to not want to have a social media presence, but if they can’t seem to tell you their true name, really look into why that is.

There could be a number of reasons why, but if you start out talking to them and right at the bat they give you a fake name, that’s a red flag. The reason why I say this, is because they are hiding something from you. Whether they have a double life or have been in trouble with the law, this is something you want to pay attention to. Especially, if you plan on having your kids meet them after going out with them for some time.


Ignoring You/Taking Longer to Reply – This one, I really had a lot of issues when it came to them taking either days to reply. However, I have finally understand that if someone likes you enough to talk to you, they will. If they don’t or have excuses as to why they haven’t replied back to you, take the hint that they aren’t interested in you.

It’s one thing if they are at work or in the middle of doing something and they give you a heads up that they are busy and will talk to you later. Its another thing if they are straight up ignoring you and you see that they are active or they posted on their story or Facebook.

Don’t waste your time waiting for a reply. My rule is if they don’t reply back to you within 24-28 hours, move on to the next one. Everyone checks their phone more than once a day, so there isn’t really an excuse as to why they can’t reply to you.


They Don’t Want To Meet In Public/Wants You To Meet At Their House – The first meeting with someone you met online, it should be in public. The reason why I say this is because of the fact that if you feel uncomfortable or the person is starting to creep you out, you can get outta there faster.

Most of the time, if a guy/girl are asking you to meet at their place, it usually means they just want to hook up. Not for everyone, but most of the time its usually that reason.

Another key thing to keep in mind, is that if you go on a date with someone in public, let a friend or family member know where you are, just in case something goes wrong. Or even have a friend at the location with you watching from a distance, so if there is something wrong or off about your date, you can text them to let them know, that way your still safe.


Overall, the best way to handle the dating world is think of it as a battlefield. The problem with today’s dating world is that there are too many apps, tons of being ghosted, and no one really looking for something real anymore.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Tooth Fairy Ideas

Hey Dearies! I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything, but with my daughter now old enough to be in the stage of losing her baby teeth, I wanted to share what I’ve been doing for the Tooth Fairy, as well as some other ideas that I’ve seen and heard from others or Pinterest!

So, I was a little nervous about how my daughter would react to losing her baby teeth. She was a little scared when the dentist told her one of her bottom teeth was loose.

Once the dentist told her all about the Tooth Fairy, she was more excited to see what the Tooth Fairy would leave under her pillow. My grandmother actually got her a tooth kit that had a little jar for her to put the tooth in and a tooth bag that she could put the jar in and place it under her pillow.

Growing up, we literally put the tooth under our pillow and when we woke the next morning, the tooth was gone and a dollar or quarters would replace it. I even remember the Tooth Fairy leaving me $20 dollars under my pillow! My mom ended up sharing how that happened once I was older.

Anyway, once that bottom tooth started to move more and more, to the point where she was nervous to just pull it, I gave her a tissue, to give her more grip. She was able to pull it out, she did cry a little bit because a little bit of blood was on it, but she was excited that she would finally get a visit from the tooth fairy.

She woke up the next morning and was so excited that she got a dollar and placed it in her piggy bank. She lost the second one recently, it was pretty loose until she lost it eating a donut since we couldn’t find it. Even though she couldn’t put a tooth under her pillow, the Tooth Fairy still made sure she got that dollar.

Now, for those of you moms who did what I did, there is nothing wrong with keeping it simple. Especially if you are like me and just want to keep the simple tradition going, here are some really cool ideas that I found on Pinterest that you might have wished you had done.


Crochet Tooth Fairy Holder

For all my crocheting moms you know that I just had to share these cute little guys! Something simple and cute for your little ones to put their baby teeth in! I really wish I had seen this sooner and I would’ve just had my daughter use that as the bag for the Tooth Fairy!


Tooth Fairy Letters

This is another super cute idea for sure! Since everyone writes letters to Santa, why not to the Tooth Fairy too! Not only are these letters typed out, but they even get little certificates for each tooth they loose too! How adorable!

https://www.homeschoolof1.com/tooth-fairy-letter


Sparkly Tooth Fairy Money

This one is a super idea to do! If you have craft glitter or even sparkly body spray, you could cover the dollar in a little bit of glitter and it would look like the Tooth Fairy sprinkled some of her magic all over the dollar.


Those are just a few ideas to look into for your little ones who are about to experience a visit from the Tooth Fairy. Even if this is the first time or if you want to do something different for each of your other children.

The best way to play that off is by saying to your children that each kid in the household gets a different Tooth Fairy. Or whatever else comes to mind. In the end, we only get to watch our children experience it once in their lives, making the imagination come alive for them.

I’m going to try my best to be more active, so don’t be alarmed if I start posting more lately!

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Chores Ideas

Hey Dearies! I wanted to go over some chore ideas that you can do with your kiddos! I will be listing stuff for all ages too as well because you can start chores or the idea of chores as little as 2 years old.

My daughter is now 5, which is still crazy to me because yesterday I remember bringing her home from the hospital and now she is in preschool. Now that she is older, I wanted to start doing a chore chart for her and introduce chores and the idea of helping out around the house.

I bought her a chore chart that is magnetic and they give you options for different chore ideas, of course, some of them didn’t pertain to my daughter yet, such as homework. Every time they would do something on the chore chart, she would get to put a star next to it.

I haven’t been strict with her about it, yet, but I did get her excited to want to start doing chores around the house if it meant she got to put a star on her chore board. Lately, to get her to get stuff done, to reward her with some screen time or mostly playing Minecraft or Animal Crossing.

Here are her usual list of chores is just simple stuff, such as brushing her hair, brushing her teeth, getting dressed, picking up toys, setting the table, etc. Simple things that she can do. I haven’t pushed her to follow through with the other types of chores I want her to start doing because I don’t want to overwhelm her with them.

You don’t want to overwhelm them with a long list of chores because then they will never want to do it. I have started her with 5, which seems to go well and she still needs to be told to do them, but she will usually do them, if not I just tell her no Minecraft and she will start getting them done.


Now that you sort of know what I’ve got my daughter doing at home, let’s talk about what kinds of chores you can introduce to the little ones.

Chore Ideas for Ages 2-3 Years Old

Of course kids, this age don’t need to enforce it, but you can start introducing to them to some simple chore ideas such as these:

  • Pick up toys & books
  • Put trash in the garbage can
  • Dust
  • Put away silverware
  • Wipe baseboards
  • Fold rags &dishcloths
  • Put clothes in the hamper
  • Put clothes away in drawers

Chore Ideas for Ages 4-6 Years Old

At this age, is when you should start making a few chores mandatory for them to do. I would start with at least 3-5 chores that they are responsible for. You can also include some of these from up above:

  • Take care of the pets
  • Set & clean the table
  • Match Socks
  • Wipe down dirty walls
  • Empty trashes
  • Sweep

Chore Ideas for Ages 7-11 Years Old

At this age, doing chores should be something they should be doing every day. You might be also including allowance for them or treats for completing chores. They should be doing at least 5-10 chores a day and if you want to include one day of their choosing that they don’t have to do it. Here are some stuff they should be able to do:

  • Fold laundry
  • Sweep
  • Vacuuming
  • Take out the trash / Taking it out to the curb on trash day
  • Wash mirrors
  • Meal prep
  • Weed flowers / Garden
  • Clean out the car
  • Clean toilets
  • Clean room
  • Organize toy room
  • Bring in mail / newspaper

Chores Ideas for Ages 12+ Years Old

At this age, they should be doing chores all week long. They might be getting more of an allowance or none at all because they know they should be doing chores without being told to do so. Here are some other chore ideas that the older kids should be doing now:

  • Mow lawn
  • Babysit siblings
  • Wash windows
  • Iron
  • Wash car
  • Cook simple meals
  • Laundry
  • Mop floors
  • Clean bathroom
  • Clean out fridge

Of course, you don’t need to do it the way that I suggest because every parent has a different way of raising their children. I was raised to do chores and as we got older, my mother stopped paying us for it once we got older because when we lived on our own, we would have to do these things for ourselves.

What kind of chores do you have set for your kiddos? When did you first start them out with chores or at what age do you think they should start doing chores? Let me know in the comments!

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Snow Activities To Do With Your Kids

Hey dearies! Since I live in Maine, we have been getting slammed with snow! As a kid, i used to love it when it snowed, especially if they canceled school.

For me, on a Snow Day, growing up, we used to go to my grandmother’s house. She had a nice yard to play in, build snow forts and she lived next to a nice hill for sledding. Which was probably the main reason we loved to visit her house during the winter.

Anyway, since I’ve become an adult, I only love snow when it’s around Christmas or New Years, after that I’m over it.

I also live in Maine, so the weather is literally crazy. One day, it’s just 50 degrees, and the next day, there’s a blizzard outside. Don’t get me wrong, I love Maine because we all have 4 seasons, but sometimes mother nature can’t make up her mind.

So, what are the best things to do on a Snow Day for your kids? Check out below!


Indoor Activities

Depending on where you live and how bad the weather is, figuring out what to do with the kids inside can be a little bit harder. Especially if you don’t want them to be glued to the TV all day.

Here’s a few ideas indoor activities:

  • Baking – This is an awesome idea because then your house is going to smell good too!
  • Playing Board Games – Depending how old your kiddos are, playing Hungry Hungry Hippos or Candy Land is always a fun time!
  • Painting – Whether it’s following a Bob Ross painting or just doing a simple freelance painting, painting is always something fun to do on a Snow Day!
  • Jigsaw Puzzles – This is one of my favorite activities my grandmother and I would do on a Snow Day. We usually picked a 1000 piece puzzle, which kept us busy all day!
  • Coloring – Whether your kids want to color or your inter child in you wants to color, go for it! My daughter and I love to color with gel pens and you can get a simple 60 pack of gel pens on Amazon for less than 20 bucks!
  • Reading a book together – My daughter and I loved doing this while she was a baby, but we haven’t done it as much as of recently. On a day where you can’t go anywhere, have you kiddo pick out their favorite books and read to them. My daughter current loves Click Click Moo.
  • Watching a movie or TV show – Usually, I’ll tell my daughter to pick a movie that we either haven’t seen in a long time or something my daughter hasn’t seen at all. Of course, watching TV all day isn’t something we want our kiddos to do on a Snow Day, but switching inbetween activities and saving a movie for the morning or the afternoon is always a good idea.
  • Cleaning – I know this isn’t a fun thing for the kiddos to do on a Snow Day, but getting them into the habit of doing chores is always a plus! Not to mention you can reward them with some screen time, too!

Outside Activities

Of course, every kid wants to be outside and play in the snow. Us adults would love to do that, but we get stuck with the shoveling duty, but there are lots of stuff to do outside in the snow!

  • Build a Snowman – One of the most classic activities that you can do outside in the snow and nowadays you can actually buy kits that have everything you need to make a snowman!
  • Make Snow Angels – This was one of my favorite things to do when I was a kid!
  • Build a Snow Fort – My cousin and I would build these all the time, especially when our grandparents driveway was plowed, we would build little holes and pretend to live it them.
  • Go Sledding/Tubing/Skiing/Snowboarding – One of the best things to do on a Snow Day! I don’t Snowboard or Skiing, but I love sledding and tubing!
  • Go Ice Skating – I’ve been ice skating and let’s just say I would rather roller blade instead, but it can be lots of fun to do!
  • Snowball Fight – My cousin and I loved to do these! Not to mention, our grandmother got us snowball makers, which made it so much faster to make them.

Those are just a few ideas on what to do indoors and outdoors. I’m sure there are a few that I missed, but let me know down in the comments what you do with your kiddos on a Snow Day!

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: What To Do If You Are Stuck In Life

Hey Dearies, long time no see. I know I have been MIA for a little bit, but I’m going back to blogging. I just switched jobs, so I have been adjusting to that and trying to come up with a game plan on what I want to do in life.

Lately, I’ve been in a funk, like I know what I want, but I’ve been putting everything on hold for some weird reason, that I don’t know why. I want to make changes in my life, but I don’t know where to start.

Since last year, my brain has been on planet crazy, from learning to co-parent with my ex, raising my daughter, learning how to find myself, going to college, and trying to have some what of a social life. It hasn’t been an easy process for me to do so.

My goal for this new year is simple: Find my purpose is life.

When I mean that, I want to find out what I want to do in life for a career. Something that has always been a question or mystery to me. I want to find my passion in life and actually do it as a career. It doesn’t help that my mind changes what I want all the time, so there’s that to work on.

So, hence why I am stuck in life, right now. I want to be able to do something that I can’t wait to wake up and do. Right now, my current job is great! No problems with it at all and the best part of it, is that I can work from home, which is a HUGE plus since I’ve been trying to do that for awhile now.

However, I like that I get social interaction with actual human beings. I’m not really one for making friends, I’m usually very quiet and keep to myself. I’ve learned it’s easier to do so until you feel comfortable.

Anyway, you are probably wondering what my point is about all of this. Everyone hits a dead end or a fork in the road when it comes to life. I realized it the other day when I looked at my daughter. I wanted to be able to spend more time with my daughter or at least do more for her. I have my license and a car, so the door is open for more possibilities.

Plus, hopefully, if all goes well, my daughter will be starting pre-k this fall, I want to spend this beginning of the year and the summer, making memories with her before she goes off to school. As much as I’m not ready for this, it’s going to happen sooner than later because that’s what our children do, grow up on us.

So, what do you do when you feel like you are stuck?

Anwser to that is different for everyone, but it starts with the simple thing of searching online the different careers you have thought about or a career quiz to find out what is recommended for your skills.

This might seem silly, but it will help you navigate through different skills, hobbies, and interests. Basically, narrowing down what careers would suit you or what might interest you because of those things.

After that, look into what would take to get you to your dream job.

For me, I have a lot of thoughts for what I want to do in life: teacher, medical coding and billing, artist, small business owner, accountant, and writer.

So far, I haven’t decide what I want to do, but I did try the path for medical coding and billing and it really wasn’t for me. After answering patient calls for the past year, I’ve been over the medical field in general. I am glad that I got to learn what it is like to know how a doctor’s office works.

You are probably wondering what my next step is, well, I have no idea, but I know one thing for sure is that I want to be creative, whether it is writing or using my creativity to sell something that people will buy, I won’t know until I try and see what happens.

Let me know in the comments if you have ever been or felt stuck in life.

Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon with a new post, I’ve got some things I’ll be working on this weekend.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Loss Of A Child Is Harder Than You Know

If you have been following me since the beginning, you know all about my son Liam and how he passed away from complications with HLHS.

A lot of people don’t realize how difficult it can be. This year, it’s 5 years since he has been gone. Which is one of the reasons why I haven’t been as active and that life can get tough when you are going through a lot.

Liam would’ve been 5 years old this year and I just realize that he would’ve started kindergarten this year, which hurts my heart more.

While everyone is taking pictures and getting excited for there kids first day, I’m missing out. Of course I’m not missing out as my daughter will start school next year, but I’m missing out on Liam.

I always wonder how he would act, what his favorite things to do would be, would he be more like me or his father. The questions will always remain a mystery.

Every now and then, I get nightmares of what had happened to him, most of the time I try to snuggle close to his blanket, it’s comfort knowing that he used to use this blanket, that I can still wrap my arms around something of his.

As time goes on, it just gets harder, but I’m grateful for the time I did get to spend with him. Even though it was short, it was all worth it.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Self Healing

Hey Dearies, I know it has been off and on blog posts lately and with everything that has happened in my personal life, I’ve been very lost and overwhelmed. It’s especially hard when this year marks 5 years that my son has been gone.

Which is why I wanted to take a moment to let you all know what I have been doing or trying to do to get myself in a better place where I need to be.

First thing first, I wanted to give everyone a thought to keep in mind because it can be difficult to actually accept it, trust me, it took me a while to realize that in order to be happy, you have to take the time to not only love yourself, but taking the extra time to spend time with yourself.

A lot of people, when they leave a relationship, most of them are quick to jump into another one because they think that having someone is what makes you happy, which if you believe that, all power to you.

I believe that happiness comes from within and it isn’t something you find in a person. Yes, you can be happy with someone, but that person can’t be the only reason that makes you happy. Being happy in a relationship and being happy as yourself are two different things.

So, since I left my daughter’s father, I’ve been trying my best to work on things, such as trying to figure out what in my life that I wanted to change and fix. One of the things that I wanted to start doing was to learn how to love myself.

How to truly love yourself?

Loving yourself can be a lot harder said than done because we are all human and we like to point out the flaws in ourselves so that we can fix them. The one thing that a lot of people have trouble with learning to love about themselves is there appearance.

I for one have had a very difficult time learning to love myself. Even growing up, I was very unhappy with my body. I would tell myself I was too fat. I would look at the smaller girls and wish to be that size so that I would be confident in myself more.

Now, as an adult, I still struggle because I’ve always been “fat” and even though I have started to lose some of the weight that I have been trying to get rid of, I still look at myself in the mirror and see myself as fat.

So, what is something I have been doing to change this?

Well, I’ll be honest, the one thing that I think has been helping me with the weight lost, is that I have been drinking more water, watching how much I eat and what I eat, and trying to do some type of exercise, whether it is yoga or walking.

I didn’t realize how small I was until about a week ago when my co-workers noticed how much weight I have lost since I first started working there. When I did, I felt proud of myself. I felt comfortable, well almost, in my own skin. I even felt confident enough to take a picture of myself in just my undergarments because I actually felt confident.

After having kids, you tend to pack on or keep some of the weight and it can be difficult to get rid of. Now that I’ve seen the change, I have motivation to do more, exercise and working out because I want to stay healthy, but I want to actually stay that size.

Do I truly love myself? I would say almost, well for me. Like I’ve said before, change isn’t something that will happen overnight.

Hobbies: Making extra “me” time

As you all know, I love to crochet and don’t get me wrong, it is one of my favorite hobbies, but depending on what projects I have going on, it’s not something I can do all the time. I also have to be in the mood to crochet as well.

Crocheting isn’t just my only hobby, but it is my go to for sure. My other hobbies that I do from time to time are knitting, writing, painting, and reading. Sometimes I have time for them, other’s I have to make the time.

It’s okay to have more than one hobby too. I even have hobbies that I want to try, but haven’t had the time to start, such as resin molds. I watch a lot of those videos and it looks like fun to try, same with candle and soap making! Trying new things is good thing and it can open doors to meet others with the same passion.

Daily Habits: What to try?

I wanted to bring up daily habits because I have been struggling to attempt to do them. One of the daily habits that I really need to get back into is mediation. I found that doing mediation after work or even early in the morning, kind of refreshes my brain and clears my head of all the thoughts running around.

I want to start doing in once in the morning and once at night, but being a mom, it can be tricky to figure out the best schedule to do so.

Another habit that I have been trying to stay on top of, is journaling more. I love writing and I have found that journaling, whether it is typing or handwriting, putting my emotions and thoughts down, can make it easier for you to figure out the best way to handle it or at least make you not so worried.

They say that if you do something for more that 30-60 days, the habit will be like second nature for you. Which is why I’ve been looking for apps to help me out with staying on task, but I haven’t found one that I like, yet.

Get out of the house more!

Another thing that I’m trying to work on, is being more out of the house. Whether it is to go to work, hang out with friend, or even go to the store. Getting out of the house, is a good thing. Yes, I am one of those that would rather stay home than go somewhere, but I’m learning to be more open about going out and spending time with friends or myself.

I don’t have very many friends, so I’m working on making some and going out more with them because everyone needs to have a social life. Yeah, we all have social media, but it’s more fun to spend time with people in person.

Even if you have a date, get dressed up and make yourself feel pretty and just enjoy life! Life is short and realizing that I haven’t done much since my son passed away, I want to learn to enjoy life more.

Currently, I’m iffy about the whole “dating scene”. Which is okay. A lot of people have asked me, “are you going to start dating again?” and to be honest, I really don’t know. I don’t think I’m ready. I even pushed myself to get on a dating app and I ended up deleting it an hour later.

Don’t rush into anything, if you aren’t ready.

In the future, if I feel comfortable and ready, then yes, I might start dating again, but I think I want a chance to be single and enjoy putting myself first. I will admit, I do miss the comfort of having someone to talk to and cuddle with, but love will come to be when I don’t expect it to.


There is nothing wrong with putting yourself first and making sure that you are happy, both mentally and physically. As parents, we put our kids first and forget about our well being and making sure we are okay.

Take the time to put yourself first because in the end, we are all human and we just need to take it day by day.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Don’t Stay For The Kids

I watched my mother for years stay with my father. Even though I didn’t really understood what was going on, but as I got older, I realized that my mom was only with my father for my siblings and I. You could see her put on that fake smile just to make sure that us kids didn’t know what was going on, but we knew.

I knew, I was the oldest and watched my mom put on this front that everything was okay, but she was slowly drifting herself down a hole just to keep the presents of a ‘happy family’ alive for us.

Well, I ended up doing the same thing my mom did, but my story is different.

As you know, I have been with the same guy for awhile and ended up having 2 beautiful children as well. However, over time, things started to change. I felt like I was putting up this front to pretend to be who I really was.

Everytime I looked in the mirror, I didn’t see myself anymore. I felt different and that can happen after having a child, you change completely just for your kid. Usually with the right partner, can be the happily ever after, but that’s not what was happening.

I’m not going to go into details about our breakup because the details are between me and my child’s father. Unfortunately, some of the people round us are very noisy and don’t understand as to why we broke up in the first place.

I realized about a year ago, if not more, that I wasn’t happy and that the only thing that kept me from leaving was our daughter. I felt like I had to stay with him because I didn’t want to ruin my daughter’s view of a ‘happy family’. Or I had to stay because that is what was the right thing to do, instead it made me realize that this was something I wasn’t just doing to myself, but to my daughter as well.

I was teaching her that it was okay to stay in an unhappy relationship.

Now, my daughter is 3, but the kids know, the sense it. I don’t know how, but they do. My daughter would give me a hard time knowing that she sensed something was up between Mommy and Daddy.

Kids aren’t stupid, they know what is going on and that’s what made me realized I had to make a change, not just for me, but for my daughter. I didn’t want her to group up and watch her follow in the same foot steps that I ended up walking in.

So, I made a change for 2021.

This year, I’m focusing on getting myself to a better place. Getting back to the real me, the one that I used to love and used to not give a shit about whatever I do. The me that I haven’t been able to embrace for a long time.

So, don’t stay because you have a family, you should want to stay with your spouse because they not only are the love of your life, but you both make a great team together and are the best of friends.

Don’t just put up with it because you have the family. You have to love yourself before you can expect anyone else to love you in return. Embrace your inner weirdo!

As for me, I’m taking it one step at a time and one day at a time. You never know what the future can hold, but I plan on being or trying to be positive for

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Where Have I Been and Plans for My Blog

Hey Dearies! So, if you haven’t noticed, I haven’t been as active as I would like and I wanted to talk about what changes have been going on in my life. Not to mention, I want to talk about the future of this blog as well.

Currently, I’ve been working on college quite a bit and I haven’t had a free moment to work on my blog, not to mention, I’m also chasing around my almost 3-year-old daughter. I’m working on getting my degree for medical coding and billing.

I originally wanted to become a teacher, I still do, but I don’t want to go through the schooling and then not going forward to be a teacher. It’s something that I’m still interested in doing, but its just something that I’m still debating about it.

I’m still crocheting, if you are wondering and still follow me on Instagram. Since we are getting closer to the holiday months, hookers and knitters, like myself, are preparing gifts for our family and stuff. I’m hoping to have some patterns posted for you all this season, but if not, I’ll have some holiday gifts ideas.

I don’t plan on stopping this blog, but I’m going to try my best to become more active, make sure to share or like any of the patterns that I post or any of my written books or short stories.

Also, I’ve been job searching as well and with lots of applying and searching, I have one! I’m really excited to get back into the workforce after being a stay-at-home mom. I’m really excited and I can’t wait until I begin this new chapter in my life.

So, please stay patient with me as I tackle on the new job, college, and of course motherhood all in one. I can’t wait to post more stuff for both arts and crafts, gaming, and writing.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: It’s Okay To Not Keep Everything (Baby Stuff)

Hey Dearies, I wanted to talk about another big problem that us moms have that I don’t think anyone has mentioned. What’s worth keeping and what’s not worth keeping from your baby’s stuff.

I know a few are you are problem screaming at me through the screen saying, ‘WHAT?!’, but let me tell you why.

As a mother who has lost a child and is currently raising one at the moment, we want to keep stuff that they have ever use, such as outfits, blankets, shoes, bibs, toys, etc. The list goes on and on, to the point you have to ask yourself one question:

Where am I going to put this all?

But, I’m here to tell you, it’s okay that you don’t keep everything. If you are like me and live in a tiny trailer, then you understand where I’m coming from. When you have a baby, you get lots of stuff and most of the stuff is NEVER used or is used maybe once or twice.

When my son passed away, I wanted to keep all of his stuff, even stuff that he had never used, not just for memories, but for our next baby. Not to mention, I made sure his stuff, that he did wear, would be in his own tote.

Growing up, my mom make sure us kids had 3 totes. Inside, she had a few of our favorite outfits, first pairs of shoes, baby books, and some other stuff. I loved the idea of keeping a tote for each of my kids, which is exactly what I did.

Even when I kept my son’s stuff, I still had a LOT stuff that I was never been able to use, not to mention, a lot of family member also get you stuff for the baby to be, which can be super helpful, but sometimes you feel like you HAVE to keep stuff like that. But let me tell you something:

ITS OKAY TO NOT WANT TO KEEP IT!

Don’t let friends and family make you think you HAVE to keep stuff that you don’t have room for or you just don’t want to keep. There are plenty of parents and parents-to-be who are in need of stuff as such.

Yes, you can save those items for the next child you plan to have, but if you don’t have space, sell it or give it to those who need it! Don’t have your house cluttered just because you want to save it for the next baby because when you do plan to have another baby, someone else will be willing to give you the same stuff that you gave them.

So, I bet you are probably wondering, why I even wanted to bring this up. Well, let me get to that because it wasn’t just because I had a lot of leftover stuff, it had more to do with the fact that my daughter was getting older and her room was turning more into storage, than an actual bedroom.

Yes, we do have closets, but living in a small trailer, you don’t have much room to begin with, so you have to work with what you got.

Since my daughter was getting older, I decided that it was overdue for me to go through her stuff and figure out what I was going to do with it all because she needed a room that she can actually play in.

I went through any baby stuff, such as clothes, rockers, bouncy seat, bibs, walkers, etc. Since my daughter was too old to be using those, I sold them. Which, to me, isn’t a big deal because they didn’t have any attachment to it.

So, what did I actually keep?

  • Baby Book
  • Hospital Bracelets
  • First outfits
  • First pairs of shoes
  • An outfit that she wore, only one from each size.
  • First pacifier
  • First blanket
  • The first dress I crocheted her
  • The crib
  • The bassinet
  • Baby swing

That’s it. The last three are because they had a meaning to me, which I am going to keep for that sake, but everything else fits in her tote. Also, when I mean I’m saving an outfit from each size, it’s one outfit from newborn to 12 months. Anything else, I have either donated or sold to those who really need it.

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But as moms or new moms, don’t feel pressured to keep everything, it’s okay to not want to. And it’s okay to keep everything, if you have the room and space for it, go for it!

Whatever preference you decide, it’s okay. Just remember, the moments and memories you create, is worth more than items itself.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Fear Of Losing All Your Adult Teeth

Okay, so this is something that really isn’t talked about, but I figured I would brush on it because it has always been a fear of losing an adult tooth. The real why I’m talking about it is because I’m not the only one who fears of losing their teeth.

When you are little, losing teeth was exciting because we would always get a visit from the tooth fairy that took our teeth and replaced us with money, but when you become an adult, losing an adult tooth can cause more anxiety, fear, and panic, especially if you don’t have any control over it.

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The real reason why I’m bringing this topic up because a few months ago, I was, still am, freaking out over my teeth. One of my top front teeth was loose, just a little bit, but any adult tooth that moves, to me, it’s gonna fall out. I when to the dentist and they told me to take it easy and not bite into anything hard.

To me, my mind was racing everywhere, my anxiety was making me think that I was gonna lose it, I’m gonna have to get an implant or worse, they’ll pull all my teeth out and I’ll have to get dentures. Not to mention, the big key factor, it’s gonna cost money that I don’t have for it.

You are probably laughing about it, but you don’t understand, this is how my anxiety is.

With that being said, I started to do what you shouldn’t do when your anxiety is as bad as mine is. Google.

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I was searching for everything from bad gum disease to implants to getting dentures. Not to mention, I started watching videos about everyday people who have had dentures since they were young.

It was bad, I couldn’t sleep a few nights because of my research.

Anyway, let’s get back to what happened when I felt that my tooth was moving. I was flossing and sometimes, my gums bleed if I floss too hard, not to mention that I haven’t been to the dentist in almost 2 years because I couldn’t afford it. So, I freaked out.

I tried to have breakfast and couldn’t finish it because I thought I felt my top tooth move, so I called my dentist and they scheduled me to come in right away. So, I went in and they took a look at the tooth and did confirm that I wasn’t nuts and it was moving slightly, keyword slightly.

Not to mention, I’m 22 and I STILL have my wisdom teeth in, they told me I needed to go get those pulled. They don’t bother me, but up until now, they are starting to push my teeth together, not to mention if I’m getting one pulled, you might as well get them all pulled.

With that being said, I’ve been brushing, flossing, and mouth rising like it is a religion because I’m afraid to have dentures.

But why are we so afraid to get dentures? Well, because we think it’s for old people, which you aren’t wrong, but there are young people who have them as well. The youngest person to ever wear dentures is 3 years old.

That’s crazy, but depending on what their genetics are, it can force you to be without your teeth. If you go on Youtube, you’ll find lots of people, young and old people, who had dentures and how they are trying to make it so it isn’t just for ‘older’ folks.

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Some of them even have dental implants, which can cost a fortune, just to get them. Hearing their stories and what they struggled with losing their teeth, especially at a young age, makes me inspired. Not to mention, it won’t make me feel alone because there are people at my age that have fake teeth.

It’s something no one should be ashamed about, but instead, embrace it.

Especially since I’ve had 2 children and pregnancy can do a HUGE number onto your teeth. So, if it happens to me, it happens. Seeing those videos and reading about these people that have dentures or fake teeth, relaxes me in a way and it lets you know that you aren’t alone.

Do you have fears that your teeth are going to fall out? Leave a comment down below, I would love to know that I’m not the only one that has a fear about it.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: What You Should Think About Before Joining A MLM

Hey Dearies! So lately, I’ve been seeing a lot of my friends have been joining MLM businesses. In the past few years, these MLM businesses have everywhere! There isn’t one person that I know that is or did join an MLM business.

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If you don’t know what an MLM is, let me explain: MLM stands for multi-level marketing. It is also called the ‘pyramid selling’, ‘network marketing’, and referral marking’.

In simpler terms, they want you to have more of your friends join so you can go up higher in the company.

Here are a few companies that are MLM:

  • Avon
  • Mary Kay
  • Herbalife
  • Scenty
  • doTerra
  • Younique
  • Le-vel
  • Pampered Chef
  • It Works!
  • Paparazzi

These are just a few of the MANY MLM businesses that are out there. I only labeled a few that are the most popular or what I have seen is the most popular.

I bet you are wondering, who are the targets for these companies?

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Stay-at-home moms or moms in general. Some companies like to have their reps post on how you can work from home and still spend time with your children. Which are most mother’s dreams, who wouldn’t want to stay home with their kids and make money all at the same time?

Unfortunately, a lot of people jump into these businesses, after being persuaded to try one of these companies products out. So, I’m going to talk about the things you need to know BEFORE joining an MLM business.


Do you like the products that they sell?

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First things first, you have to love what you are selling before selling it. Most people get into MLM businesses because they loved the products that the businesses were selling. Think of it this way, if you wouldn’t use it or buy it, why would you have your friends and family buy it?


Talk to a form rep or read reviews from former reps online.

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Before even investing a dime into an MLM business, talk to the former reps! From their experience, they can tell you what they wished they could’veย done differently. They can also give you some pointers on what helped them out when they were active in that company. Even ask them why they left and keep that in mind when you are thinking about joining an MLM company.

DON’T talk to the reps that are still active, they will most likely convince you to join the company and tell you how great it is, but you need to make sure you have not just the pros, but the cons too.


How much money will you have to invest?

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This is another big one to think about. Especially, if you are a stay-at-home mom. Making sure you know or have an idea of how much money you spend on an MLM company, is a HUGE thing to know.

Reps will talk about how it’s only a small or one-time price to join, but you also have to think about if you will be buying more products. Remember, you have to show what you are selling to make a sale if your clients don’t know what it looks like or wants to see it in person.


Will you have the time for it?

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This is also another thing to think about. Some of the companies want you to post on your social media all the time about the products or hounding you to make a sale. If you are a stay-at-home mom, you want to make sure that you can care and spend as much time with your kids, but if you also have to post or make sales, it might be harder to do.


How many other people, such as friends and family, sell it?

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You won’t be the only one selling for an MLM company, but it is good to know who is selling from the same company you are. If you have more than 3 people selling the same products you are, it is going to be difficult to even make a sale.

A lot of people don’t think about it either, they get so excited to sell the products that an MLM is offering, that when it comes time to do so, they are having even more trouble trying to make a sale since they find out that more peeps on their friends list are selling the same thing that you are.


DO YOUR RESEARCH ON THE COMPANY!!

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A lot of people forget to even think about this before joining. You want to make sure that the company is everything that you are told it is. If they support or donate money to a charity or support a group, make sure that they are really doing so.

Before becoming a rep, you want to make sure that when you get into an MLM company, they are everything you support. Making sure that the quality of the product is the same as well and also making sure what they claim is true, as well.

Doing your own research and making a list of the pros and cons of the company is something you must do, especially if you want to join an MLM company.


Take your time, don’t rush into it.

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Looking over all the pros and cons of an MLM company, you can decide whether this is something you want to do. Talk it over with your spouse, family, and friends, get their insights about it.

Take as long as you need, just remember, the choice is yours. If you think it’s a great idea, go for it! Just make sure that the company and its products are what you are passionate about. Remember, if you wouldn’t buy it, why would you want to sell it to anyone else?

 

 

 

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: What Some People Don’t Understand About Being A Stay-At-Home Mom

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What do you think of when you hear ‘stay-at-home mom’? Do you think, ‘Wow, they are so lucky, they must get so much time.’ or ‘Their kids must drive them crazy!’ or ‘They probably didn’t want to go back to work.’ There are so many opinions about stay-at-home moms, but they don’t understand what goes through the mind of a stay-at-home mom.

I’m a stay-at-home mom. I made the decision to become one when I realized that I didn’t want to miss out on any of my daughters milestones. I also talked to my fiance to make sure it was something we could afford to do.

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However, I didn’t expect to be a stay at home mom. Way before I even had kids, I did have a plan of what I wanted to do in my future. I wanted to become a teacher. Still to this day, I would love to be a teacher, but sometimes plans change when you have kids.

Let’s get back to me being a stay-at-home mom. The other downfall is that I don’t have a way to get from place to place because I’ve got some compilations with getting my license, so once a week, my mother comes to pick me up and it gives me a chance to get out of the house.

When I get back home, I’m in this state of mind: lonely. I know I’m not alone, but when you are a stay-at-home mom, the only people you talk to is your children and whenever your spouse is home. You are probably saying, ‘Don’t you have other friends or mom friends you can talk to or invite over.’

Yes, I do, but here is the thing about me. I have no problem talk to close family, but when it comes to friends, I feel like this: I’m bothering them. They are probably busy. They don’t want to hear from me. I don’t have a car, they will think I’m using them. They probably don’t like me.ย 

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Those sentences run through my mind when I think about talking to someone other than my family. I do have a few friends that stay-at-home, but I will always feel like a bother to them. Which I might not be, but I feel like that for everyone, anytime someone does something for me or my family, I feel it was done because I was a bother.

Moving on, a lot of people think their house would be spotless, being able to stay home. I try my best to keep the place in ‘decent shape’, but between ordering stuff online, broken appliances, toys everywhere, and having a bunch of stuff that we have no room for, it’s very hard to keep this place spotless.

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I’m lucky to sweep at least once a week or vacuum. Dishes, the ones that we use the most get rewashed everyday, the other just sit until we need them. I’ve gotten all the dishes done at one point, but they stack up quicker. Laundry has been difficult because of the fact that they are broken.

It’s not just that, I worry about not being able to pay off bills, my own medical bills. I worry about little things, but they turn into giant things because my mind makes them a big thing.

You also have to take in fact that my daughter always wants me, so doing stuff around the house during the day is difficult. ‘You can get them done when she goes to sleep or takes a nap.’ Yeah, I can, during her naps, I try to get as much as I can done, but when she goes to sleep for the night, it’s difficult because I’m exhausted and I usually take that time to relax doing what I want to do. Sometimes, I’m just too tired and just go to bed.

The one thing people always asks me is:ย Do you love being a stay-at-home mom?

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Yes and no. The no part is that you don’t socialize very much with adults, chores can be a challenge to do, you get depressed very quickly, you mind feels, and you never get a break, sometimes. Why do I love it? I get to see my daughter reach milestones. Watch laugh, cry, walk, find her voice, play with her toys, talk, and most of all, make her known that she is loved.

If you are a stay-at-home mom and can get all the chores done, being able to sit on the couch folding laundry with a cup of coffee, watching your kids favorite T.V. show, good for you! I’m glad you have the motivation to do all that, I wish I had motivation for that.

But, if you are like me, where we barely get stuff done, spend it most with our kids, forgetting to sweep, worrying about what to do with stuff that you can’t decided to throw away or keep. It’s okay!

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It’s okay that our emotions get in the way, we just have to learn to deal with them in the most healthiest way possible. It’s okay if you reach out for help, sometimes you just need an outsiders point of view.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Being Afraid Of The Scale

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When I wake up in the morning, the first thing I see in the mirror is me. Not just me, but the extra weight that hangs over, under my arms, under my chin, and the worse, the muffin top.

Ever since I’ve been little, I hated the scale. In school, I didn’t want to step on it and have everyone find out what my weight was. To this day, stepping on the scale scares me. I’m afraid of it being too high. I’m afraid of everyone knowing my number of how much I weigh.

It’s hard for me to even think about losing weight, because I always hear everyone around me saying, ‘Isn’t she too young to be big for that size?’. It has scared me, to the point where I was ready to give up on trying to lose weight and ignore the comments.

The comments would always come back to haunt me. Even after having kids, I still haven’t managed to lose the baby weight, but other mothers are so lucky and drop it at the snap of their fingers. I’ve always wanted to be just like those moms, drop the extra weight and keep it off.

This morning, after I woke up, I did something I wouldn’t normally do. Step on the scale.

Just pulling it from under my sink, I worried on how big the number was going to be, even with me doing yoga for about a week. What if the number is too high? What if the yoga isn’t working or I’m not putting in enough effort? What if I am eating too much?

Those questions kept circling my mind as I finally stepped onto the scale. My face flushed as I looked down at the haunting number. 234.8. A lot of you might not think that its a lot, but for me, I have been in the 200’s since high school. It puts a damper on your mind. Or for me, I tell myself that it’s not good enough.

You see, we are told at a young age that we can’t be ‘big’ or ‘fat’. Even in school, they make us take a test on how ‘healthy’ we are, or to see how ‘overweight’ we are. To me, it made me feel that I had to be skinny to fit in, have friend, do sports, or even join teams.

Maybe its just me, that has problems trying to lose weight. Maybe I’m the only one having issues with it. It gets harder to want to do anything when technology keeps getting better and is making us become more lazy or not have motivation to do anything.

The real issue is that no of us should be afraid of stepping on a scale, but stepping on a scale will give you, not just a number, but where you would fit on the scale of what is socially normal to be, in this world today.

Next time you see an overweight person, don’t judge them because they are fat or look overweight, don’t judge them. You should only judge them as a person by their personality, not their looks.

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Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Why I Decided To Fix An Old Friendship

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So, if you have been reading or following my blog since April of this year, I talked about how I had to get rid of one of my best friends because it was too much unwanted drama and stress. I didn’t fix that relationship, believe me, it’s not worth fixing, to me.

I’m talking about another relationship that I destroyed back in my senior year of high school. I can’t really remember why I got rid of her as a friend. I believe it was because I thought she was more drama, but I don’t have a set reason on why I did what I did.

I’ve known her since the 10th grade, but we really connected and became best friends in 11th grade. We had many fights, but always fixed them as soon as possible. When senior year was coming to an end, I ended the friendship. Maybe because I didn’t think I would see her as much? Maybe I wanted to end the pain of losing her as a friend?

The only thing I can think of is that I was very immature and everyone in high school can be immature. What really made me look back and realized all the stupid shit I did and all the people I pushed out of my life, was when I lost my son.

When you go through something as difficult and it changes you. You think of things differently, you rethink all your actions, and you become more mature after going through something as difficult as death or anything.

After my son died, I deleted my old Facebook and created a new one a few months after, I wanted time away from social media. Well, in the past couple weeks, I saw her profile pop up on my suggestions list for friends. I debated on whether on messaging her or not, just because on how I ended things so quickly and without reason.

I’ll be honest, when I finally got the courage to message her, I literally had it all wrote out on my phone, planning on what I was gonna say to her. Deep down, I knew that I should at least be an adult and say sorry for all the crap I caused. All I thought she would do is have my ass handed to me, which I totally deserved, but I was shocked.

I think she was shocked too when I sent that message, but I’m glad I did. She forgave me, something I didn’t think that would happen, but she did. It shows how much we have both grown up in the past almost 3 years.

We ended up telling each other everything we have done within the past 3 years. We even talked about our high school days. I was shocked to find out that she had been thinking about me too, wondering why I got rid of her as a friend.

If I looked back at the only really close friendships I had, the one I had with her, was probably the best because we clicked a lot better that I did with my other ex best friend. The ex best friend, we had a few things in common, but I feel I was more issues and drama because she wanted to be center of attention.

I’m glad I took the shot to fix a broken friendship that I ruined. It felt good to know that after 3 years, we clicked back, just like that. Even now, that I have kids, she still would’ve stayed if I just kept her in my life, but the past is in the past. I’m going to try my best to, hopefully, keep this friendship for many more years and years to come.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Is It Possible To Work From Home As A Stay-At-Home Parent?

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Yes, I know it’s been a while since I have done a ‘Mom Talk’, but I wanted to go into detail to see if it is really possible to work from home as a stay-at-home parent. Whether you are trying to make extra cash for spending or looking to create a permit career.

Every since I had my kids, I’ve always wanted to be a stay-at-home mother and also have a career from home as well. There is a lot of scams, but their are a few that are very legit and could even give you benefits for you and your family.

I search everyday for a work at home career or even just a part-time job, but there is always an issue. Either I don’t have the experience, I don’t have a quiet place, or don’t have the sale mind to bug people to buy the products I’m pushing to sell.

So, I looked into doing survey’s for cash. However, there is always a catch. You either can’t cash out until you make, at least, $20-$30 bucks, which takes forever to do. Plus the survey’s were either the same thing, that I would spend 30 minutes to an hour to complete and only got less than .25 cents, or I wouldn’t qualify for most of the survey’s.

Let me tell you something, it IS possible to work from home. You just have to find it at the right opportunity.

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I’ve heard so many stories of people that are making enough money for even their spouses don’t have to work, plus still having enough money to buy their dream home, or have that car they always wanted, or even have a big family, like they have always dreamed of having.

I’ve always thought that if the time was right, the opportunity will come to me, I just can’t stop searching. Although, I’ve been trying to get back into the Customer Service pool, but the two things that stop me are: I have a loud, barking at whatever moves or makes a loud sound, dog and not feeling confident enough to do both working and taking care of my daughter.

That’s why I started this blog. I wanted to have a job where I could work whenever, but still have time for my kids. I still haven’t found a way to actually make money off of it, yet, but it’s possible. I just can’t give up.

Maybe one day, I’ll be able to look back on this all and enjoy my life as a stay-at-home mom and a working mom. Like I have always told myself, if it’s meant to be, then its meant to be. If it isn’t, just keep on swimming and don’t give up.

Posted in Mom Talk

My Little Heart Warrior

**WARNING**

*This is a very true story. Tissues might be needed. It was difficult to write this, but it is something that helps me express what had happen with my son and his short journey. Please, just take caution when reading.*

There are a lot of ‘Mom Blogs’ out in the web. Some talk about how to take care of a child or their experiences with their child’s first achievements in life. But I haven’t seen very many that talk about the experience of having a child with a heart disease. Let’s just say that it’s very much an emotional rollar coaster.

Well, that’s what it was for me. My son was diagnosed with HLHS (Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome) when I was 22 weeks pregnant with him. Basically, HLHS is when the left side of their heart is either underdeveloped or never formed. Once he was born, he would have to go into surgery within the first week of life.

Altogether, he would have to go through 3 major surgeries with in the first 3 years of his life. Now, I was 18 when I was pregnant with my son, Liam. Image being me at 18, and being told that there was a very big change that he wouldn’t make it. Liam’s everyday life would be either life or death.

The happy family that my fiance and I imaged had changed. We didn’t know if he would make it to his first birthday. We had so many unanswered questions. Would he be able to play sports when he gets older? Would he need a heart transplant in the future if his starts to fail? Or the big question that we wanted to know: Would he ever make it home from the hospital?

Because of how serious his disease was, we weren’t able to have him, in our state. We were recommended to go down to Boston Children’s Hospital. We were told that they deal with congenital heart defects everyday. It made me and our family feel a lot better about having Liam there.

Once Liam was born, he was the most beautiful baby boy that I ever laid eyes on. You couldn’t see that there was anything wrong with him, but on the inside, there was a struggling heart that we would of never noticed.

As soon as I hear him cry, I started to cry myself. They cleaned him up and gave him medicine, to keep the values from closing. We could only hold him for a minute before they took him up to where he needed to be.

I finally got to hold him longer, later that day. I wanted to keep holding him because I knew that once he had his surgery, it would be a very long time until we were able to hold him again. They planned for his first surgery to be on June 27th, 2016, 3 days after his birth.

My fiance and I spent the entire day with him, holding him, getting as much closeness as we could. Until, the morning of his surgery came. We walked down with him, until we got to the point we weren’t able to go past. We both kissed his and held his little fingers. Praying that god would watch over our little boy.

During that day, we got out of the hospital, trying to get our minds off of the fact that they were doing surgery on our son. I wanted to wait all day, but my fiance and I agreed it would be best to go out and get some fresh air. We got frequent updates, while Liam was in surgery. It made me feel better that someone cared enough to let us know that everything was going smoothly and that they would keep us posted until he was our of surgery.

Once they called to let us know that he was doing great, they told us that he was all set to see visitors. I was nervous and scared to see how he looked. Even when we got closer to his room, tears already started to pour down my face.

As a parent, you never want your children to go through surgery or be hooked up to anything. Seeing Liam for the first time out of surgery, was life changing. His chest wasn’t closed, they keep the chest open for a few days to make sure everything is working out fine before they close it. Every time I would go to see him, I asked that they covered his heart, just when I was in there. I don’t know why, but I felt uncomfortable.

As weeks went passed, they finally closed his chest and slowly started to take him off some medication and his breathing tube. We were finally able to hold our son again, after about 4 weeks from his surgery.

We thought that things were going great, he was able to leave the NICU and move over to what they called was ‘The Floor’, meaning that Liam still needed nurses, but not 24/7, like he did in the NICU. The doctors said that once he was able to start eating from a bottle or breast and a few other things, he would be able to go home.

Day 2, of being on ‘The Floor’, was the most horrible day of my life. The nurse had come in to give Liam his medicine and he was being fussy, so she suggested that I pick him up and rock him. All of a sudden, my worst nightmare had happen. He stopped breathing in my arms.

The nurse took him and pressed the code blue button, 7-8 other hospital staff rushed in to help, they took him back over the NICU. I followed them, shocked and frighted. My fiance rushed over to the hospital, they wouldn’t allow both parents to stay in the room together, so he had to stay at a place that was a mile away from the hospital.

My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. I didn’t know what to do, they had a nurse stay with me until my fiance got there. All I could say was, ‘he stopped breathing in my arms.’

They did CPR on him for 45 minutes until they were able to get on bypass. They didn’t know what happened. They figured it was a blood clot that blocked blood from reaching his heart. The told us that they were going to try and take him off bypass slowly and hope for the best, but if he was still on it after a week, there was a good chance that Liam wouldn’t make it.

During the time he was on bypass, Liam had brain damage, from getting CPR for too long, kidneys and liver were starting to fail. We ended up sitting down with a few doctors and his surgeon. We also got our immediate family to come up, for the support. They said that once we can get him off bypass, that they would be able to determined if he would still have brain activity, but by the looks of what they were trying to read, he had little to none brain activity.

My fiance and I looked at each other and prayed that god wouldn’t take Liam from us. He did. On July 23rd, 2016 at 4 in the morning, our son had passed away. When they took him off bypass, he was doing fine, but slowly started to decline. My fiance, his mother, my mother and I, were with him when he passed. I held him until his heart stopped beating.

Everyone I knew, their baby got to come home in their car seat,ย  but Liam never even left the hospital. He didn’t come home in a car seat. He came home in a box. Every mother’s worst night mare.

It was really hard to write this, but I think it’s time that everyone knows that not every baby born in this world is perfectly normal. I rather tell people my experience than let every mother or soon-to-be mother think that everyone’s child is born healthy.

Because my son wasn’t born healthy. His heart disease was something that not even doctors know how it was caused. I’ve googled it thousands of times, no one know’s why HLHS happens or any congenital birth defect.

This year will be two years that Liam has been gone. I’ll never get to see him on his first birthday or see him walk or talk for the first time. He was two days shy of being a month old.

But there is one thing that I want to let everyone know. Whether your child was on this world for a day, month, or years, you can’t just get over it. People think that because Liam wasn’t even a month old, that I can just get over it.

To this day, I still cry about him, not as much as I first did, but I do still cry about him. I always will. He is my little Simba and I miss and love him so much.

On a happier note, Liam gave us a surprise from up above. We were blessed with our daughter, Isabella on October 25th 2017, our rainbow baby. I believe that he knew we were ready to be parents, as cheesy as it may sound, and gave us our healthy daughter.

Every year on his birthday, we release balloons, in honor of him. In honor of our heart warrior, our little Simba. Now, our Simba is looking down and watching over his little sister from up above.

Liam Michael (June 25th, 2016 – July 23rd, 2016)

Liam Michael
Our little heart warrior

 

Posted in Mom Talk

How to Deal With Family Drama (Mom Talk)

Whenever I hear the term “drama”, it immediately makes me think of high school. I honestly thought that drama would be out of my life for good after I graduated high school, boy was I wrong.

There is drama almost everywhere you look. Whether its at work, social media, or family, its bound to happen at some point. The best kind of drama is when its not happening to you. However, it is very difficult to avoid or stay away from since not everyone is going to agree with you.

Family drama can cause issues and damage, depending what the issue is at hand, it might cause some to avoid or even go low contact with other family members. Like for example, I don’t talk to my father, he did a lot of bad stuff in the past that I don’t want my children around him at all. It was a decision I made for my children and myself.

Because of this, it has caused issues for other family members, which I don’t care anymore. Some people think I should forgive him and others agree with my decision and respect me more that I don’t want my children around toxic people like that.

As a parent, you’ll always have to deal with drama, whether it’s family or in-laws. You tend to deal with more if you are co-parenting. The best advise for that drama is to remain civil the best you can. I think of it as getting along for my daughter’s sake since I would rather get along versus have my daughter stress over her parents fighting.

A lot of people, like myself, will tend to not say what’s on my mind, especially to people I know can get very emotional and take to heart. I don’t do it because I have no back bone, I do it because it keeps the peace and its not something I have to stress about it.

Over time, I’ve realized that I am a recovering people pleaser which I’m trying my best to stop doing that. Its hard, especially if you are like me and want to make sure everyone gets along. (You can tell that I’m a Libra!)

Here are the top suggestions for trying to avoid the unwanted family drama:

  1. Set Clear Boundaries – I have struggled with this one, a lot. Looking back, I wish I was more clear on what my boundaries were when it came to A LOT of things, but the past is in the past. Setting boundaries lets the other party know that this is the line and don’t go past it, but in a kind way.
  2. COMMUNICATE – Communicate is key to any relationship! Whether it’s family, your co-parent, friends, neighbors, etc. You need to communicate directly. In a nice way, or in a way that can help you get the other party to understand.
  3. Don’t Gossip – I know this is hard for ANYONE to do, especially when its family. When its family, its kinda hard NOT to gossip because if you don’t hear about it at all, you’ll find out or hear others gossiping about it at the family reunion or holidays. Not gossiping can help with the spread of miscommunicate. Which can have a snowball effect on its own.
  4. Find out what triggers others to react – Especially when you are telling someone boundaries, before you react, think about what tone or words will trigger this person so that you can avoid a blowup. Before you react, count to 3 and take a deep breathe. I do this especially because I’ve react before thinking about how to say something and it doesn’t go well.

These are a few things that can help you, but don’t be upset if they don’t work. There are special cases where NOTHING works and you are stuck with trying to please a person who cannot be pleased.

One thing that helps me, is journaling. Looking back at how I felt in that moment and trying to understand how I could handle the situation differently. If its something I really don’t want to remember, I’ll rip it up or burn it and its like a sense of relief off my shoulders.

What are the best ways you have handled family drama?

Posted in Mom Talk

How To Deal With Unwanted Advice (Mom Talk)

Once you find out your expecting your first child, its an amazing feeling! Your excited to experience being pregnant and feeling your child grow to giving birth and watching them grow. However, the moment you get pregnant, the unwanted advise will start to kick in.

Some people are very genuine, but there are others that will pull the whole, “When I was pregnant,” or “I raise my kids this way.”ย  It can be very overwhelming and it does make you very cautious about how you will raise your kids because you’ll feel like you need to raise your kids the way they are telling you.

Best part, you don’t NEED to take their advise.

I would nod and thank them anyway. I was always raised to be kind and respectful to my elders or anyone in general. I would say usually, “Thank you for the advise, I’ll keep that in mind.” Saying something as simple as that is sweet and perfect to use.

As a mom, you will get told by everyone how to care for your child. From your family to doctors to strangers. Even before the baby’s born, you will be told how to even take care of yourself.

What’s important is what’s best for YOU. If you aren’t sure about something, whether when you are pregnant or kids, ask your provider, they would know what is best. Of course you can always go to your mom, but if you really are unsure, going to a professional would be the best advise that you can get.

When I was first pregnant with my son, I wasn’t as vocal as I wanted to be. It was all new, exciting, and I was scared shitless. I was worrying about all the wrong things that could happen with the pregnancy, especially with it being my first. I was even more overwhelmed when I found out my son was going to have a heart condition.

Even when they knew about his heart condition, I still got the unwanted advise. I don’t think many people understood that with his heart condition, it was all together going to be a different situation. I just kept to myself and thanked them anyway since I was more worried about if my son was going to make it.

My daughter, it was completely different. I put my foot down to a lot of stuff. I’m still trying to make sure that peoples advice doesn’t change the way I want to raise my kids. Plus, we as moms, get judged on everything.

With my more recent daughter, I did get some advise, but honestly I did take most of it in consideration since there has been a huge gap between my oldest daughter, to my youngest and there had been a lot of changes since she was little.

To me, I will take the advice into consideration, but if it’s something that I, as a parent, will not do to parent my child, then I speak up. Sometimes, I can’t speak up to others about this because I’m afraid of hurting their feelings, but I have learned that when it comes to you parenting your kids, the only feeling that matters is your kids and yours.

There are three ways you can handle unwanted advise:

  1. Ignoringย  it – This is what I usually do, if a stranger were to approach me with unwanted advise. I usually will nod my head. Sometimes, I do it with family, its easier to do, if you don’t want to make a big deal out or you know it will turn into a giant fight, this would be your best go to.
  2. Speaking up, in a polite way – If you are a person that voices your opinion, but don’t want to offend anyone. This would be more towards close friends, maybe family. Telling them in a polite way, will make it seem not as harsh as bluntly coming out and telling them what is what.
  3. Bluntly telling them straight up – I only go this far, if I’m frustrated. If I have had a bad day and didn’t have any coffee, I snap. I usually will only snap at family, because they have been in my shoes. Plus they understand that they would rather me snap at them versus my kids.

There is one thing that we always need to keep in mind. How we parent our kids, may not be the same as other, but we should respect how others parent. The world we live in now, there are too many people judging before they know the full story, but when it comes to advise, we need to handle it as we feel comfortable.

Posted in Mom Talk

Why You Shouldn’t Smoke Around Your Children (Mom Talk)

Back in the day, we didn’t know how bad smoking cigarettes can be. Now, you don’t see any commercials promoting cigarettes or tobacco. If you do, its very rare to see an add for cigarettes. No matter how much people hate it, there are people who still smoke today and I don’t think it will go away anytime soon.

I’ll admit, I have tried a cigarette a few times, but thankfully it wasn’t something I got addicted to. It also helped that most of my family didn’t smoke around us either, which made me grateful I didn’t get into that. I’m actually shocked that I didn’t start smoking when I was living with my ex, who ask smoked as well as his family.

Even though I have never became addicted to it, I could see how difficult it is to try and quit. I watched my ex tried to quit, but would always cave when his family was around because they still smoked. He almost had quit for a full year before our daughter was born to then give it up the day after we had her.

Back in the day, people were smoking all the time with kids around. In public places or in their own homes. No one realized the dangers until more research was done to show and prove that they can kill you faster than eating fast food every day. They also found out that second hand smoke was just as bad as smoking the cigarette.

Which is why I will keep my kids away from cigarette smoke as much as I can. Smoking is a bad habit, but you shouldn’t make others or your children have to deal with your habit. I know so many people I went to high school where if they lived in a household where their parents smoked, 9 times out of 10, I saw them pick up the same habit.

Even when you are in another room or holding up the cigarette away from the child, they can still inhale the second hand smoke. Especially in a car. Rolling down the windows WILL NOT prevent the smoke from getting to the child. Thankfully in Maine, you can get fined for smoking in the car with any minor under 15 or 16.

As a mother, who had a child with a heart condition, it’s even more fatal. I’m one of those moms that will not go into a house or car if it smells like cigarette smoke. I was never around it and I want my kids to not be around it.

I will be making sure that my kids don’t get into that awful habit. My daughter knows whenever she sees a cigarette to think of it as a ‘cancer stick’. Since one of the possibilities with smoking can be getting cancer from it.

I’ve lost family members because of their smoking habits, I don’t want to risk my children’s life just because someone needs to have a cigarette.

Posted in Mom Talk

Being a Stay-At-Home Mom (Mom Talk)

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A lot of moms don’t have the pleasure to stay home with their children nowadays. In order just to live, you need both parents income and even that can barely keep you afloat. Even then its still a struggle to afford daycare on top of all the other bills as well.

Back in the day, the husband would be out working, while the wife stayed home to care for the kids, keeping the house clean and in order, and as well as making sure that there was a cooked meal ready for when the husband got home.

Being a stay-at-home mom isn’t for everyone. I honestly never really thought about being a stay-at-home mom much until after I had lost my son and got pregnant with my daughter that I didn’t want to miss out on her growing up and reaching milestones that I would never get to experience with my son.

After I had her, I knew I would have a very difficult time leaving her when I had to go back to work. So, her father and I decided that being a stay-at-home mom would be the best thing for not only me, but it would save us on having to pay for childcare as well.

At the time, I didn’t have my license and the only places I could walk were just to my mother-in-laws, which I didn’t do much because we lived on a very busy street. Not to mention, I was living in a trailer park that also wasn’t close to any store at all either.

We did have a mini backyard that I had a swing that I could go out on, which was nice to have, but I felt very alone during the day and even more at night. Since my daughters father worked night shift, I barely had time with him during the day before he had to leave for work.

I did feel very alone, even though I was with my daughter, I felt so alone. The social interaction I would get from her father, was more of what bills need to be paid, what groceries we needed, and what we were going to do the weekend. I felt like I was on zombie mode.

Which is why I started to get into blogging more and even had a pen pal that I would e-mail just to stay sane. Sure, I had my family I could call and text, which I did often, but they didn’t really understand what struggles a stay-at-home mom can go through.

I become very depressed after the 2nd year of being a stay-at-home mom. I loved being able to spend time with my daughter and watching her grow up and learn new things, but I also hated being stuck and alone most of the day.

Thankfully, I did manage to get out at least once a week when my mom would come on Sundays. We would do our usual visit to see my great-grandmother or do something fun for the day either visiting family or shopping or just getting out of the house.

The sad part was, the moment I got home, I was alone again.

My depression got so bad to a point that I didn’t think I’d ever get to the point of not being here. However, the voice in my head kept telling me, “your daughter needs you.” That was the thing that kept me going, but it also terrified me of how she would have to cope if I went through with it.

Thankfully, my mom helped me get myself out of the tunnel of darkness and back on my feet. After the 3rd year of being a stay-at-home mom, I got a job and started working again.

After that, I moved in with her, got my license, bought my first car, and worked on myself within the first 6 months of leaving my ex. As much as I loved spending all the time in the world with my daughter, I was slowly losing myself.

I never regret being a stay-at-home mom because my daughter and I had lots of fun and she always made me smile, especially on my bad days. If I had to go back and do it again, I think I would, but I would find a remote job so that I didn’t loose my mind completely.

Being a stay-at-home mom is hard, but the memories and watching your child grow up and hit milestones, is priceless. I really wish we didn’t live the way that we did so that more mother’s could experience it for themselves for at least the first year.

I wish I did that with my youngest daughter that I had back in February of this year, but with how my current living situation is, it would be difficult to do. I did take a longer maternity leave with this one, but ended up going back to work shortly after.

Overall, choosing to be a stay-at-home mom has is ups and downs, however, it is up to you to see if that lifestyle is something for you. After being back in the workforce, I personally wouldn’t be able to do it again, unless I was working from home.