Posted in Unforgotten

Unforgotten – Chapter 1

If you haven’t read Unclear, I recommended that you do because this is the sequel to it! Here is the link for the list of chapters for Unclear:

https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/21/unclear-list-of-chapters/

Don’t know what this book is about? Here is the link for the intro for Unforgotten:

https://katiesblog96971617.com/2019/01/07/unforgotten-sequel-to-unclear-intro-backstory/

~Chapter 1~

Athena’s P.O.V
First day of school, I’ll be a Junior, this year. Same as my brother. I groaned when the sunlight hit my face. I looked over at my alarm clock and saw that it had just started to go off. I wasn’t ready for this first day, I missed my dad.
My dad left awhile ago, for a business trip I think, but he hasn’t answered my phone calls or have told mom when he was going to come home. Usually, when its the first day, my dad would walk into my room and wake me up, as he was excited to get us kids out to school.
He would then make an awesome breakfast and drive us to school, wishing us to have a great day, but this was the first time he has missed a day like this. I got up and opened my closet, picking out an outfit out of the new school clothes that my mom and I got a few weeks before.
I decided that one of my WWE Lita shirts would do with some shorts, since I had a feeling it was going to be hot out. My phone started buzzing, as I looked over, it was a text from Ricky, my best friend.
You need a ride? he texted.
I ignored it, he and I have known each other since we were babies, but since he has started going to college, we haven’t talked much since. I wondered why he would just message me out of the blue like this?
Someone knocked on my door as I tossed my phone on my bed and grabbed my backpack. “I’m coming!” I said, as I looked and saw my brother come in.
“Ricky’s giving us a ride. Why didn’t you message him back?” Logan asked as I zipped up my bag and threw it over my shoulders.
“I wanted to walk.” I lied. I really didn’t want to talk to Ricky. I looked over and saw my phone go off. I looked at my caller ID. It was my dad. I quickly grabbed the phone and answered.
“D-Daddy??” I asked, I had a tear escape from my eyes.
“Yes, how’s my baby girl?” He asked. My heart was overjoyed. Logan’s eyes got wide as I put the call on speaker.
“We miss you, daddy. Logan’s here too.” I spoke, wiping a tear or two away from my face.
“Hey dad.” Logan said.
“I miss you both so much. I wanted to call and wish you a great first day. I’m sorry if I can’t make it.” He explained. Logan looked at me, I bet he could see the smile on my face, just hearing my dad’s voice. “I’ll be home as soon as I can. Something happened with my trip and it might be awhile longer.”
“How long? You okay, daddy?” I panicky asked.
“I’m not sure, sweetie. I’ve been feeling under the weather and I can’t travel until I’m better. I’ve got to go, but I love you too so much.” My dad hung up the phone as I finished wiping my tears. Logan pulled me in to hug me.
A car horn honked from outside. Logan pulled away and left. “I’ll be right out, just have to grab my stuff.” Logan said. I walked out to the front of my house, where Ricky’s car was parked. I got in the back seat as Ricky turned his head and gave me a smile.
He looked different, he cut his long blond hair and doesn’t look like he has shaved his face in awhile. “How are you, Athena?” He asked, but I looked towards my house, hoping that my brother would come out sooner.
“Fine.” I said, just to shut him up. Finally my brother got out of the house. Logan opened the passage’s door and got in.
“Hey Ricky, thanks again for giving us a ride.” Logan said as I rolled my eyes. “My mom said that if you need gas money, we can give you some.”
“Naw, don’t worry about it.” Ricky said, driving away from our house. “Actually, wanted to know if you guys wanted to come over Saturday to a party?”
“Hell, yeah we would!” Logan excitedly said.
“I’ll pass.” I snapped, crossing my arms as I noticed Ricky had glance at me through the mirror.
“Come on, you don’t have to drink, it will be fun.” Logan tried to convince me.
“No, I-I have a date.” I lied. Why the hell did I just say that.
“You don’t date.” Ricky said as he turned into our high school. “You are coming, I’ll bring you home whenever you want to go.” He stopped the car.
“Thanks, but no thanks.” I got out of the car and quickly slammed the car door, walking as fast as I can into the school.
“Athena, wait up!” I heard Logan shout as I saw him pacing himself for running after me. “What was that all about?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I snapped and Logan dropped the subject. Logan and I walked to our homeroom, we had the same homeroom since coming to high school. We both sat in the back of the class as Ms. Eddy counted to see who was here.
I decided to putt out a mini project I was working on. I started to crochet a bookmark as Logan played on his phone. Ms. Eddy passed out our schedules and smiled when she saw me. “Working on a new project already, Athena?” She was the one to get me into crocheting, since it was a way to stay stress free.
“Yeah, I’ve been trying some different one’s in the book you gave me.” I returned the smile and pulled out the finished product of what I was working on.
“Beautiful, I love it.” She dropped the schedule on my desk. “Here you go, I’ll be seeing you at 8th period.” The bell rang and everyone in homeroom, grabbed their stuff and left. My brother took my schedule and peaked at it.
“We have English, Algebra 2, and History together.” He handed my schedule back. “Come on, sis.”
________________________________________________________________
Logan’s P.O.V.
“Why can’t I go?” I argued with my mother. “Just because Athena doesn’t want to go, I can’t go? This is bullshit!”
“Logan! Watch your language!” my mother sighed. “I feel safer if you both went together. I know you think you can take care of yourself, but I don’t trust Ricky enough to keep an eye on you.”
I through my arms in my hair. It was totally crap that she didn’t want to let me go by myself. “Fine, what if I get Athena to go?” I asked.
“Then you can go, just make sure you are back before 11.” She then went back to looking at the computer. Her office phone rang. “Let me know what the plan is.” She answered the phone and I walked out of her office and headed down to Athena’s room.
I walked right in, Athena was on sitting on her bed crocheting, like she normally does. “Thanks for knocking.”
“I’m sorry, but can you please come to the party with me, tonight? Mom won’t let me go by myself.” I spoke, checking my phone as Ricky had just texted me that he was on his way. “Pretty please, Athena?”
“I already said no.” She snapped as she kept crocheting.
“I’ll tell mom about your habit.”
She looked at me in confusion. “What?”
“You heard me, I’ll tell mom you’ve been smoking pot.” Her eyes widen, she stopped what she was doing.
“How do you know about-” I stopped her from finishing her sentence. “I’m not the only one who uses the treehouse for that.” I replied with a grin on my face.
I remember the first time I caught her, she didn’t see me, but I’ve been low on pot and come to find out that she’s been up there smoking it. I never thought that my sister would do anything like that.
She rolled her eyes and placed her crochet stuff on her night stand. “Fine, but I’m not staying long.” I grabbed her sweater that was hanging and threw it to her.
“You might want to change, its’ getting chilly out.” I said before leaving her room. I popped my head back in. “Forgot to tell you that Ricky is bringing us. He’ll be here in 2 minutes.” Athena crossed her arms and gave me a dirty look.
I slowly walked into my mom’s office, she looked tired, but when she saw me she gave me a small smile. “So, is she going?” My mom asked.
“Yeah, she changed her mind. It’s still okay if we go, right?” I asked.
“As long as you are home before 11. Make sure that you both have your phones and you let me know when you arrive and when you are on your way.” She said, sitting back down in her chair before answering another call that was coming in.
I heard Ricky honk, and Athena was already waiting for me outside. She had a dress on, which was shocking because she normally doesn’t wear dresses or makeup, for that matter. I ignored and we started to walk over to Ricky’s car and he drove us off to the party.
___________________________________________________________________
Ricky’s P.O.V.
My party was going pretty hard. I had a lot of girls come up to me, but the one I was interested in, was ignoring me. She looked hot, especially for a girl who never liked to dress up. I poured two shots and walked over with them to her.
She crossed her arms and looked away, when I sat down next to her. “Seriously, Athena, please just talk to me.”
“Why should I talk to you?” She snapped at me. I handed her a shot, but she still didn’t look at me.
“Tell me what I did wrong! Please, I’m begging you. I want to fix this.” She rolled her eyes and got up and walked away. I seriously couldn’t remember what I did. I got up and followed her outside.
“Athena, stop running from me!” I yelled, grabbing her wrist as she pulled away and looked into my eyes.
“I told you that I loved you and you said nothing! Just ignored me and said you were busy with college!” She screamed. She told me before I left for college and I didn’t know what to say to her. I loved her too, but her mother warned me to stay away. I didn’t have the heart to tell her.
“I’m sorry that I didn’t explain why I didn’t say anything. It’s more complicated than that.” I said pausing. “I’m never going to be good enough for you. I figured ignoring your feelings would make it easier for you to forget.”
Athena started to cry a little more. “Ricky, it’s not that simple.” She spoke softy, I tried to hug her, but she put her hand out in front of me. “Can we please find Logan so we can leave?”
I nodded as I went back inside to get Logan.
I felt so stupid. Why couldn’t I just tell her? I wanted to be the only one for her, but I don’t want to ruin our friendship, which was already on the rocks. Maybe I just needed to find someone for me, so that I can help her move on.
_________________________________________________________
Logan’s P.O.V
Ricky came to get me and it was all silent in the car ride home. I figured I would leave it alone, unless something bad happened.
I thank Ricky for the ride home and Athena never turned back to look at Ricky. I didn’t understand why she was acting like this. Maybe it’s because dad has been gone for so long? I followed her into her room. “Is everything okay?” I asked as she turned and nodded. I didn’t believe it for a second.
“Seriously, what is wrong?” I snapped, crossing my arms. Athena sat down on her bed. Taking off her shoes and jacket.
“Don’t worry about it, its nothing.” She snapped. I rolled my eyes, this is what she would normally do.
“Put your shoes back on, let’s go to the treehouse.” I said as she looked surprised. She got her shoes back on and followed me to the backyard, where stood the tree that held the tree house we all build together.
For years, Athena and I would come up here to talk or to read, but it has been transformed into a mini smoke place for me and sometimes Athena. Our mom has no idea that’s what we do up here, but my dad knows and says as long as I don’t get caught, he’s okay with it.
I climbed up the treehouse first and then helped Athena get inside. She sat on the right side of the treehouse, that’s where she would normally sit. I grabbed a little bit of pot and started to grind it up for a joint.
“Seriously, what’s wrong? And don’t lie to me. I’ll find out one way or another.” I said, looking up at her for a second. A faint smile appeared on her face.
“You sounded like dad.” She said as I returned the smile. “I miss him, Logan.” I nodded in agreement. Don’t get me wrong, we love our parents, but we love it when all of us are here together. Mom has been busy stressed out on trying to pay the bills, that she hasn’t had the time to spend it with us.
It doesn’t bother me, but Athena doesn’t really have friends expect Ricky and I. Although, Ricky and Athena seemed to not be talking as much as they used to. I decided I was going to break the awkward silence. “Is there something going on between you and Ricky?” I asked, finishing up the small joint I rolled.
Athena sighed as I put the joint in my mouth and lit it. “I-I-I told him how I felt and he didn’t say anything about it.” She softly said, as I passed the joint to her. I knew she had feeling for him, but I figured she would be too shy to say anything to him. I did know that when our mom found out, she told Ricky to stay away, Athena doesn’t know, but my mom doesn’t want history to repeat itself.
“Look, I’m just gonna come out and tell you this because I love you and I am your twin.” I took a deep breathe. “Mom told him to stay away from you, before he left college. She didn’t want your heart to be broken.”
Angry flushed her face. He handed the joint back to me, she wanted to pace back and forth, but there was no room to do so. “I can’t believe she did that! I’m tired of her treating me like a little flower!” I started to laugh, when she said flower, but it’s the truth. “It’s not funny!”
“Okay, I’m sorry, but I didn’t think you were going to say flower.” Athena finally started to relax. “Listen, here’s what I think about all this. Yes, your in love with him, but you have never been in love with anyone else. I think you need to put your feelings on the back burner, which I know will be hard to do, but I think that you’ll find someone else and forget about him.”

Chapter 2: TBA

New chapters will be posted every Monday! Can’t wait til then? Check out the book on Wattpad! Search ‘katieasehl’, not only will you find this book, but other’s that I’ve finished or currently working on!

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Posted in Arts and Crafts, Gaming, Mom Talk, My Secret Love, My Writing, Reviews, Uncategorized, Wrestling (WWE)

New Schedule For Katie’s Blog!

Hello dearies! As we are reaching to the end of the year, I just wanted to give you guys some heads up on the new schedule for my blog. I know that you guys want content, which I am working on for the upcoming year!

For the past week, I have been working on a way on how I can make myself become more active on my blog. Figuring out what I love to do and what I really didn’t care or have enough excitement to do. Meaning, I don’t want to write or blog about stuff that I don’t have enough of an excitement to do.

So, let’s begin!

-Art & Crafts and/or Crafty Sassy

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So, this topic, is not going anywhere. I love to try and make new things and this challenges me, which I love to do! Crocheting, of course, will be my top project and I will keep posting on Tuesdays, like I have done normally on Tuesdays. HOWEVER, I have stuff planned out in advanced, so that I don’t run out of ideas on what to do next.

That being said, here is what is going to be ‘new’ for Crafty Sassy:

  • Temperature Blanket
    • This is something I have found and I am very excited to try it out. Basically, you are crocheting a granny square a day of what the temperature was that day.
    • I plan on giving you guys updates once a month, so that you can see my progress.
  • Project of the Month
    • This is something I want to try out. Every month, I will make a project of the month, which the design is going to represent each month.
    • These’s will be done for the first week of each month with a different project for each month.
  • Bookmark of the Month and/or Coaster of the Month
    • I’m still debating on whether to do this or not, but for bookmarks, there are a lot of ideas I would love to try, same goes with coasters.
    • Either way, these’s projects would be done for the last week of the month.

The rest of the weeks, I will ask you guys on my Facebook Page on which I should do and go live showing you OR have a pre-made video on ‘how-to’ make that particular design. This also gives you guys a chance to let me know what project or design I should do next.

-Gaming

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This was another topic that I barely posted about, but I am going to try my best to make a change to post more. First off, I would like to start going live or stream live, but I still have to look into it and make sure I know what I am doing before I jump on it.

For the time being, gaming stuff might be tips or updates on my Sims Series or reviews in general. Like I said, this one might take a little longer to get started, but I plan on post/streaming Sunday’s. Make sure you like my Facebook Page, that would be the best place for me to give you guys updates on this.

-Mom Talk

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This one has been off and on, but I will try my best to add more. It is very difficult because when I first started, I had so much to talk about, but now, I find that it might be harder for me to post about ‘Mom Talk’ stuff.

Is it something that is ending? No! I will try to post one of these at least once a month, but don’t quote me on it. When I first started out doing it, it was a way to let me release my fears or answer someone’s questions about parenting, but in my sense of style.

-My Books

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If you haven’t noticed, I have been working on some changes to my blogging website. If you are looking for my books, they are in that tab, but let’s talk about what’s going on with that.

Now, I am currently in the middle of a book, which is on Wattpad. I’m trying to get as much as I can done before starting the new year, and no, I’m not rushing it. I have a lot of ideas for it and just never had the time until now.

If you are wondering why I’m not posting very much, that is why. I’m making sure that this next book will last, at least, a half of the year to a year. What I mean by that, I need to have enough chapters to post on Mondays and Fridays, but because I am trying to become a better creative writer, my book chapters will be posted on Mondays only.

The reason why I posted them on Mondays and Fridays was that I saw a lot of people checking them out more on those days, so I made it more for my readers, but once I realized I didn’t have enough work for my audience (you guys), I had to come up with a better plan.

So, for the New Year, chapters of my next book will be published on Mondays. Sorry for the long ramble, but writers tend to do it.

-My Writing

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This was where I labeled my books ‘My Writing’, but that is changing. Which I will be going back to EVERY chapter for each book and getting rid of the ‘My Writing’ title because I have something bigger and better planned for it.

Here is what is starting to go in this category:

  • 365 Days of Writing
    • I saw it on Pinerest that some of them where doing writing prompts for every day for 365 days of the year, which I am very excited to start the beginning of this upcoming year!
    • Basically, I will be posting something everyday, for my writing prompt, but what it is about is a surprise for you guys!
  • Friday’s Short Stories
    • Every Fridays, I will be picking a theme or genre and writing a short story on that particular theme or genre.
    • If you know me, I love writing about romance and love, but I am very excited to try this out, as well! I will also be posting what theme or genre I will be doing on my Facebook Page, so if you guys want to try it out with me as well!

-Reviews

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This is something new that I want to try out. The reviews can be on anything, from books, T.V. Shows, movies, products, etc. I have a plan that I want to try and split it up, so that the reviews aren’t about just books, or just movies.

I don’t have a plan on what day I planned on doing them on, but I think Thursdays, once a month, I will do a review, if not, every other week. Like I said, this is something new and I will also make a video to go with it as well, than just a normal written review.

-Wrestling (WWE)

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So, for me, it was very stressful to do a re-cap of Raw and Smackdown, that’s why I stopped and the fact that I don’t watch them until the weekend. It didn’t make sense to keep doing it unless I was posting the same day that Raw and Smackdown aired.

Superstar of the Week and Hall of Famer of the month was also very stressful, but let’s talk about why. When I thought about doing it, I thought it was a great idea, I loved the fact that I picked a male and female superstar and talked about them, but I felt that I was rushing each one.

Instead of taking the time to write about them, I felt that I didn’t take the time to really write about them. I’m sorry if that doesn’t make any sense, but as a writer, I like to make sure that everything I post is something that is worth reading and I really rushed those ones.

Here is how I’m going to learn from my mistakes:

  • Superstars of the Month
    • These are going to be written a month in advance, but twice a month, I will post a male superstar of the month the first week of the month.
    • And a female superstar of the month the last week of the month.
    • January, we will start out with the Raw brand and then switch off every month. I will still post on Wednesdays for this topic.
  • Pay-Per-Views
    • So, instead of recapping Raw and Smackdown, I will be doing it for the PPV’s. Which are usually on Sundays and I usually watch these live.
    • I figured this would be a little easier for me to do, than trying to recap Raw and Smackdown.

-Podcasts/YouTube Channel

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Yes, podcasts are still a iffy. I am not sure that I will bring them back or not. It is something that I would still love to do, but I have realized that it might be better with another person with me.

So, for podcasts, they are currently not in the plan for the New Year, but if you want me to keep doing them or thing they were worth me putting the time in, then I will possibly think about it.

My YouTube Channel will become more active in the New Year. I am going to make sure that any craft projects, reviews, and my Sims Series are uploaded more. I have a plan to make sure to work on my Sims Series more and make sure that I upload a new episode every month, if not, twice a month.

For the craft projects, basically a how-to’s and updates to any of my finished projects, especially the temperature blanket. Like I said, I have a lot to plan in the upcoming new year.

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There it is! The plan for the upcoming new year. I will try my best to post more stuff, but thank you for all being so patient! If I do post anything, it might be for my store or new craft projects. I do want to have some new patterns for you guys!

 

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: What Some People Don’t Understand About Being A Stay-At-Home Mom

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What do you think of when you hear ‘stay-at-home mom’? Do you think, ‘Wow, they are so lucky, they must get so much time.’ or ‘Their kids must drive them crazy!’ or ‘They probably didn’t want to go back to work.’ There are so many opinions about stay-at-home moms, but they don’t understand what goes through the mind of a stay-at-home mom.

I’m a stay-at-home mom. I made the decision to become one when I realized that I didn’t want to miss out on any of my daughters milestones. I also talked to my fiance to make sure it was something we could afford to do.

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However, I didn’t expect to be a stay at home mom. Way before I even had kids, I did have a plan of what I wanted to do in my future. I wanted to become a teacher. Still to this day, I would love to be a teacher, but sometimes plans change when you have kids.

Let’s get back to me being a stay-at-home mom. The other downfall is that I don’t have a way to get from place to place because I’ve got some compilations with getting my license, so once a week, my mother comes to pick me up and it gives me a chance to get out of the house.

When I get back home, I’m in this state of mind: lonely. I know I’m not alone, but when you are a stay-at-home mom, the only people you talk to is your children and whenever your spouse is home. You are probably saying, ‘Don’t you have other friends or mom friends you can talk to or invite over.’

Yes, I do, but here is the thing about me. I have no problem talk to close family, but when it comes to friends, I feel like this: I’m bothering them. They are probably busy. They don’t want to hear from me. I don’t have a car, they will think I’m using them. They probably don’t like me. 

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Those sentences run through my mind when I think about talking to someone other than my family. I do have a few friends that stay-at-home, but I will always feel like a bother to them. Which I might not be, but I feel like that for everyone, anytime someone does something for me or my family, I feel it was done because I was a bother.

Moving on, a lot of people think their house would be spotless, being able to stay home. I try my best to keep the place in ‘decent shape’, but between ordering stuff online, broken appliances, toys everywhere, and having a bunch of stuff that we have no room for, it’s very hard to keep this place spotless.

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I’m lucky to sweep at least once a week or vacuum. Dishes, the ones that we use the most get rewashed everyday, the other just sit until we need them. I’ve gotten all the dishes done at one point, but they stack up quicker. Laundry has been difficult because of the fact that they are broken.

It’s not just that, I worry about not being able to pay off bills, my own medical bills. I worry about little things, but they turn into giant things because my mind makes them a big thing.

You also have to take in fact that my daughter always wants me, so doing stuff around the house during the day is difficult. ‘You can get them done when she goes to sleep or takes a nap.’ Yeah, I can, during her naps, I try to get as much as I can done, but when she goes to sleep for the night, it’s difficult because I’m exhausted and I usually take that time to relax doing what I want to do. Sometimes, I’m just too tired and just go to bed.

The one thing people always asks me is: Do you love being a stay-at-home mom?

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Yes and no. The no part is that you don’t socialize very much with adults, chores can be a challenge to do, you get depressed very quickly, you mind feels, and you never get a break, sometimes. Why do I love it? I get to see my daughter reach milestones. Watch laugh, cry, walk, find her voice, play with her toys, talk, and most of all, make her known that she is loved.

If you are a stay-at-home mom and can get all the chores done, being able to sit on the couch folding laundry with a cup of coffee, watching your kids favorite T.V. show, good for you! I’m glad you have the motivation to do all that, I wish I had motivation for that.

But, if you are like me, where we barely get stuff done, spend it most with our kids, forgetting to sweep, worrying about what to do with stuff that you can’t decided to throw away or keep. It’s okay!

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It’s okay that our emotions get in the way, we just have to learn to deal with them in the most healthiest way possible. It’s okay if you reach out for help, sometimes you just need an outsiders point of view.

Posted in Not Again

Not Again: List of Chapters

Not Again is a short story that I wrote back in my Junior year of high school. It isn’t the best, but I just haven’t have the time to go back and edit at it because it really does. Anyway, here is the list of chapters, just so you don’t have to scroll through all of them.

Intro and Chapter 1:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/12/my-writing-not-again-intro-chapter-1-short-story/

Chapter 2:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/15/my-writing-not-again-chapter-2-short-story/

Chapter 3:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/19/my-writing-not-again-short-story-chapter-3/

Chapter 4:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/22/my-writing-not-again-short-story-chapter-4/

Chapter 5:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/26/my-writing-not-again-short-story-chapter-5/

Chapter 6:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/29/my-writing-not-again-short-story-chapter-6/

You can always check out Wattpad for the full book, but I have heard that posting a list of chapters, especially to long books, helped out a lot of you and I find that it was easier to find a chapter you are looking for.

Posted in Not Again

Not Again – Short Story (Chapter 3)

Not Again Book Cover

If you haven’t read Chapter 2, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/15/my-writing-not-again-chapter-2-short-story/

*Warning, Mature Content. Read at your own risk!*

~Chapter 3: It Wasn’t Me~

I woke up the next morning with someone pounding on my door. Ugh, what did May want now? I looked over at the clock, 10:15 a.m., I might as well get up anyway. I got up and answered the door. It was Sami at my door and she looked pissed. She slapped me across the face really hard. What the hell was that for?
“You are such a slut!” Sami said as I rubbed my cheek. Boy, did she slap me hard. “You knew how much I loved Ty and then you go ahead and make-out with him in front of me! He was my boyfriend and you had to have him, didn’t you?” I looked up at her, confused, as I was. I left the party to go get food with Chris and then he dropped me back home.
“I left the party, Sami. I bumped into Chris and we went to go get Chinese food. And after that, he dropped me off home.” I said as Sami pulled up her phone. “I didn’t even go inside.” She then she showed me a picture of a girl, who was wearing the same dress that I was, that night, making-out with Ty.
“You ‘left’ the party alright.” Sami said as she was getting sarcastic. “You are going to pay for this.” She said and then slapped me one more time and left.
I left the party when Chris did. I know that wasn’t me. I would never do that to anyone, especially to Sami, but to be honest, she kinda did deserve it. I mean, I was her only real friend who cared about her. Now she was on her own, I guess.
I then got dressed and walked downstairs to find my mother sitting in her chair reading a book. She looked up from her book and smiled at me. I returned the smile.
“Hey, mom?” I said as she placed her book down and had her attention at me. “Is it okay, if I go to the library to study with Chris?” I asked.
“Of course you can. Just be home before dinner and please make sure you get home safe and sound.” She replied as I grabbed my backpack and my car keys.
“Don’t worry, I will. I’ll be back for dinner.” I said opening the door. My mother then went back to her book and continue to read. I’m glad that she is doing better today. I then left my house, excited to meet Chris at the library. I’m so glad things are changing, hopefully for the better.

If you can’t wait til the next chapter comes out, feel free to check it out on Wattpad, just search my username, katieasehl, not only will you find this book and others that are either finished or I’m currently working on.

Chapter 4:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/22/my-writing-not-again-short-story-chapter-4/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 19)

*Warning: Mature Content. Read at your own risk!*

If you haven’t read Chapter 18, here is the link!

https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/01/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-18/

~Chapter 19~

“What the hell is your problem?” I woke up to someone screaming in the next room. I looked over, to see if Dylan was next to me, but he was gone. I rubbed my eyes and got out of the bed.

“My problem is that you can’t just fuck her for the fun of it!” Once I heard that voice, I knew who it was. I ran out of the bedroom to find Michael and Dylan yelling at each other.

“We didn’t fuck! You need to relax and let her be her own person. I would never do that to her. I cared about her-” I stopped Dylan in the middle of his sentence.

“What’s going on?” I asked, Michael walked over and hugged me.

“I have been looking everywhere for you!” I pulled away from his embrace. “We are leaving.” He grabbed my arm, trying to pull me to the door, but I pulled away.

“No.”

“No?” Michael spoke.

“No, I’m not going. You need to leave me alone. I can’t forgive you for what you did.” Michael threw his hands in his hair and walked back and forth.

“It wasn’t my fucking fault! Whatever, blame it on me because I wanted to save your life so that we could be happy together. I’ve tried, I’m done.” Michael then slammed the door.

“I’m so sorry about that. I didn’t think that he would go all through this trouble to find me.” I said. I grabbed my stuff and walked out the door.

Dylan followed. I could hear his footsteps following me.
“Please don’t go.” He paused when I turned around. “Is there anything I can do to help you?”

I nodded and he lead me into the garage. “You can take my Jeep and go where ever you want.” He handed me the keys and I got in and just drove. I never wanted to look back.

If you can’t wait for the next chapter to come out, feel free to check it out on Wattpad! Just look up katieasehl and not only will you find this book, but others that are finished or I’m currently working on.

Chapter 20:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/08/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-20/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 18)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Mature Content. Read at your own risk!*

If you haven’t read Chapter 17, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/28/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-17/

~Chapter 18~

I haven’t talked to Michael in over a week. I have been inside the house, crying over the death of my brother and drinking to heal the pain of losing him.
I walked into the kitchen and poured myself a shot. I downed it and poured another one. I saw Michael was still sleeping on the beach, he had gotten himself a tent and has been camping out on the beach until I welcomed him back in. Which I haven’t.
I missed him. I felt so stupid for blaming him for something that wasn’t completely his fault. I downed the second shot and looked at the time. It was only 3 in the afternoon. I figure I should get out of this house. I downed another shot and went to go get dressed.
I grabbed the car keys and walked out the front door. I wasn’t able to go to far because Michael was just about to knock on the door.
“Hey, how are you?” He asked as he looked down in my hands and saw the bottle of tequila and car keys I had in my hand. “Where are you going?”
I was silent and slowly walked passed him. I didn’t know what to say, but cry at this point.
“You shouldn’t be driving with that.” He said as I then turned to him and tossed the keys to him.
“Fine, I will walk.” I said before turning around and muttering ‘asshole’. I took another sip and walked down the boardwalk. It wasn’t that busy for a Friday, but it looked like it was going to rain. I still kept walking, taking sips of the bottle of tequila while people stopped and stared. I could care less. My life was coming to be pointless.
I found an empty bench that was facing the ocean, I just sat and watched the sun set. Someone came up and sat next to me. “Elizabeth?”
I turned and saw Dylan, the guy I met at the nightclub. I turned and faced the ocean again. “Are you okay? You look like you have been crying. Is everything okay?”
I took another sip and muttered ‘No’. I started to cry some more. “What can I do to help you? I’m not gonna leave you here to be drunk.”
“Can you bring back my dead brother?” I asked, looking at him.
“I can’t.”
“Then there is nothing you can do for me.”
“Where is your boyfriend? Do you want me to go find him for you?” I laughed.
“I never had one to begin with.” I said, still laughing that he thought that Michael was my boyfriend.
“Okay, well, what do you want to do?” He asked as I got up to stretch. “Get drunk with me.” I downed the rest of the bottle and handed it to him. I started to walk down to the nightclub, where we first met. Dylan followed and threw the bottle in the trash and grabbed my hand. I held onto his hand, not caring if Michael saw.
“I want some shots!” I yelled at Dylan, while we were standing at the bar. Dylan nodded and ordered some for us. Once they were in front of me, I looked at Dylan and grinned. “I’m gonna warn you that I’m already pretty drunk and that I might take your shots.” He then downed his and mine once I finished speaking.
“Hey! Now you need to order more!” I said, Dylan laughed and I smiled. I haven’t smiled in such a long time that it felt good to smile.
“Bartender, I need two more for her.” Dylan said as the bartender poured another two shots. I downed them both and looked up at Dylan. “Do you want to go back to my house? I’ve got a hot tub.”
“Yeah! I don’t have a bathing suit though.” I said Dylan paid the bartender and we started to walk out.
“That’s okay, I can buy you one or you can go in your bra and panties.” He smirked. I grabbed his hand as we walked down the boardwalk to his house. His place was huge, like a mansion, almost. “Dude, I didn’t know you were rich!” Dylan laughed as he opened the gate and held open for me. “Who do you think owns the boardwalk?”
“Shut up! No way!” I said as we walked up the path and entered into his home. We walked upstairs to his room and on the balcony was a hot tub. He started to take off his shirt and looked at me. “Well what are you waiting for?” He then got into the hot tub. I slowly took my tank top off and then my shorts. I was wearing a red bra and panties set. “Damn, you look hot.” Dylan said as I took off my flip flops and got into the hot tub.
“This is so relaxing. Thank you.” I said as Dylan smiled.
“No problem, do you want something to drink and some music?” He asked, I shook my head yes as Dylan got out. “I’ll be right back.”
I closed my eyes and just took a minute to relax. It was a long time since I have felt relax, or calm. Dylan came back in and had turned on a Pandora station and handed me a glass of red wine.
I took a sip as he got back into the hot tub. “You look a lot more stressed free.” He said as he sat down beside me. “With what I had gone through in the past week or so, I needed this.”
He wrapped his arm around be and took a sip of his wine. I did as well. He then smiled. “So now that you aren’t with that dude, am I okay to finish what I started?” He asked, I took a moment to think about it. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea? I’m drunk and I don’t think Michael would like the fact that I would be doing something with another guy. I was still upset with him.
I looked at Dylan and placed a kiss on his lips. I pulled back and looked up at the sky, a tear fell from my cheek. “If you don’t mind me asking, but what happened?” I was silent for a minute. I closed my eyes and all I could picture was that bloody scene, my brother, death in my arms.
“My brother was shot in the head by my ex.” I said as I looked at him. “I thought I was in love with my ex, but once we were engaged, everything changed about him.”
“He would beat and rape me. Some nights, I didn’t even want to go home. I didn’t feel safe anymore.”
Dylan stayed silent after I took another breath.
“One night, I had enough, he beat me almost to death and that’s when Michael took my brother and I here. I thought we would be safe, but he found me. My father was helping him look for me and he ended up killing him. Tim and I got away, but I blamed Michael for everything. Tim and I, stupidly, left Michael and stayed at a hotel. My ex found us, shot my brother and I killed him.”
I started to cry some more, Dylan then hugged me. “I’m so sorry, Elizabeth.” I looked up at him and he wiped my tears away. “Let’s get you into some dry clothes and get you some sleep, okay?” I nodded as Dylan helped me out of the hot tub. He gave me a shirt and sweatpants, that smelled like his scent. I laid down in his bed, placing the covers over me. “If you need anything, I’ll be downstairs.” As Dylan started to walk out of the room.
“Wait.” I said as Dylan stopped. “Can you lay with me?” I asked as Dylan nodded and got underneath the covers as well. He wrapped his arms around me and I fell off to sleep. The only thing that I was think about was Michael.

If you can’t wait for the next chapter, you can always check out this book on Wattpad. Just search my username, katieasehl, not only will you find this book, but others that I have either finished, or I’m currently working on.

Chapter 19: https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/05/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-19/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 17)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning* Mature Content! Read at your own risk!

If you haven’t read Chapter 16, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/24/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-16/

 

~Chapter 17~

“How are you feeling?” Michael said as I woke up. My head was pounding. I looked around the room and saw Michael laying down next to me in the bed. “l wanted to let you know that I laid your brother to rest. He’s buried in the back.”
It took me a minute to remember what had happen. Tears started to fall down my cheek as I started to sit up.
“Did I kill Justin?” I asked. Praying that this was some horrible dream. Michael looked at me and nodded.
I quickly got up, not believing that all this was real. I ran outside to the back of the house where Michael said my brother was buried. There I saw a wooden cross that was planted on the ground. I slowly walked towards the cross and dropped to my knees.
Tears fell from my cheeks as I saw what I had hoped was only a dream, but yet, my worst nightmare had happen instead.
All I could think that I was alone. I had no one left.
The only family I had left in my eyes was Tim. My father and mother did care about me, only if I was what they wanted me to be.
“I’m so sorry, Elizabeth.” Michael said as I looked up and saw Michael, from the corner of my eye, on his knees staring at me. ” I know this is a very hard time that you are going through, but you need to let me help you through this.”
My heart wanted to listen to him and let him help me, but my brain thought otherwise. He was the reason for all this mess, I thought to myself.
“You started this, all of this. Its your fault my brother is dead. I should’ve never allowed you to come back into my life.” I said.
“So you are going to blame me for everything that I had no control over?”
“Yes.” I stood up and so did Michael.
“I came back for you, so I could be with you. I didn’t know that Justin would beat you almost to death and kill your father and brother. You can’t blame someone else’s actions on someone else.” He paused as I looked away. My tears were starting to dry up on my face. “I didn’t know that he would find you-”
“That’s the thing. He did find me! You said that my brother and I were both safe and that he would never find us, but he did!” I screamed at him.
“Elizabeth, I’m sorry. I love-”
“Don’t even finish that sentence! You only love yourself!.” I started to walk back to the house when he grabbed my arm.
“Will you let me finish?” He asked, I pulled my arm from his grasp.
“No! Fuck off and leave me alone!” I ran into the house and locked the door. I fell down to the floor with my back up against the door.
I could hear Michael climbing up the stairs and trying to open the door. “Please Elizabeth, let me in. Let’s talk about this.”
I stayed silent, until I heard his footsteps walk away from the door. I held my head in my hands as I started to dry even more.
I didn’t know what to do or how to feel about everything. My mind was everywhere. I knew it wasn’t Michael’s fault, but I wanted someone to blame. I cried even more knowing that I just pushed away my best friend and the love of my life.

If you can’t wait until the next chapter to be out, feel free to check this book out on Wattpad! Just search my username, katieasehl, and not only will you find this book, but other’s that are finished or I’m currently working on!

Chapter 18:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/10/01/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-18/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 15)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Mature Content. Read at your own risk!*

If you haven’t read Chapter 14, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/17/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-14/

~Chapter 15~

I looked at myself in the mirror. Took a deep breathe and smiled. Looking outside, it was a beautiful evening for a date on the boardwalk. I was nervous, its been years since I’ve been on a date with Michael.
Michael was sitting on the swing in dark blue jeans with a plaid button up shirt. He smiled when he saw me. “You look beautiful.” He said.
I smiled as he stood up and planted a kiss on my forehead. “Ready for tonight?”
I nodded as he grabbed my hand and we started to walk down to the board walk.
“So, what do you have in mind for tonight?” I asked.
“That’s for me to know and you to find out.” He smirked. “But it will be a night to remember.”
I started to get butterflies in my stomach, just like I did the first time we met.
As we walked down the boardwalk, we headed over to the amusement park. I started to smile. He remembered.
Our first date was at the town fair and he had snuck me out, since my parents hated him and did not like the fact that he was a ‘bad boy’, has my father put it.
Michael tugged my hand, “So where do you want to start? Your choice.”
I smiled as I pointed over to, what was called, the Thunderbolt. One of my favorite rides to go on.
We started to walk over to the ride, when I noticed him. I froze were I stood. He wasn’t alone. My father was standing right next to him.
“We can’t go over there.” I said as Michael looked to confused.
“What are you talking about?” He asked, as my father spotted me from the distance. I turned around and ran as fast as I could, pulling Michael with me. “What the hell is going on?”
I ignored him and kept running, until I ran into the nightclub, that was  far enough to explain. Once we got in, I hurried over to wear the bathrooms were.
“Are you going to tell me what the fuck is going on right now?”
“He’s here.”
Michael’s face froze. “Who’s here?”
“My dad and my ex. They were standing by the ride with a SWAT team. I have to let my brother know.” I pulled out my phone and dialed my brother’s number.
The phone kept ringing and ringing. He wasn’t picking up. I was getting worried. “How did they find me?” I asked as Michael was on his phone calling out to someone.
I tired to call my brother again, still no answer.
“We have to go back to the house.” I said as I started walk away. Michael grabbed my hand.
“We can’t. We need to stay here, my boys are on their way to get your brother and bring them to a safe location.”
“Michael, how did they find me?” I asked again.
“I’m not sure, I did everything to prevent them from finding you or your brother. My friend, Caleb, said that they checked the video footage of us all boarding the plane, but he can’t confirm for sure.”
Michaels phone went off and he quickly answered the text message. “Did they find my brother? Is he okay?” Michael had a sad look on his face, which worried me. “Michael, my brother is fine, right??” I asked again.
“I’m honestly not sure, but we do need to get out of here, now.” He grabbed my hand as we went out the back door.
Their was a black Hummer waiting for us. We jumped into the car and sped away.
“Jay, what the fuck is going on?” Michael asked the guy in the driver seat.
“Shit just went down and let’s just say I grabbed you guys shit and fucking left.” He explained, driving as fast as he could.
“Where’s my brother? Is he okay?” I asked.
“We got him just in time before they started to blowing shit up, but when we spilt, they caught the sight of Ren’s car and started to follow him. I tired to get your brother to get in my car, but I don’t think he heard me.”
“Where are they now?” Michael asked as he jumped in the other front seat and grabbed the GPS. “Shit, they are on his tail.” Michael turned to me. “Call your brother right now.”
I dialed my brother’s number. It kept ringing, until I heard his voice. “Tim, are you okay? Please tell me if you are okay?”
“Sweetie, I’m fine, but your wondering ex is on our ass.”
“Did you see dad?”
“Yeah, but about him, he’s never going to hurt us anymore.”
“What do you mean, Tim?” I felt like I was gonna throw up.
“He’s dead.” I went silent and froze.
“Elizabeth, hey, what did he say?” I dropped my phone on my lap and Michael quickly grabbed it.
“Hey Tim, its Mikey. What’s going on?”
I just couldn’t believe it. My father was actually dead? I hated him, but I never wished for him to be dead. I still stood, frozen.
All I could think of is that I went through all this trouble and my father ends up being killed. My mind kept racing.
Michael got off the phone and turned to look at me.
“Elizabeth? You okay?” He asked. I still went silent. “We are going to meet up with your brother in a little bit. They lost your ex in the backways.”
I looked out the window and stared through the glass.

We finally stopped driving when we got to a place that looked like a safe house. Michael looked back to me, but I ignored him. I was just overwhelmed with everything. I didn’t know how to feel.
I got out the car and fell to my knees. Tears fell from my face. I couldn’t stop crying. All I could picture was my father, taking Tim and I to the park, playing on the playground as he would watch from one of the park benches. Back to when we were younger and there was nothing wrong with my life. Back before I met Michael.
“Elizabeth, I’m here for you.” Michael said as he wrapped his arms around me. I didn’t feel that warmth that I felt before, nor how much I loved him. All I could feel was rage.
I stood up, pushing him off of me.
“Don’t fucking touch me!” I screamed. “You caused all this! This is your fault! I wish I never met you!” I slapped Michael across his face. My tears were starting to dry on my face because of the wind.
“It wasn’t my fault!” He said, but I didn’t believe him. “Can you please just calm down so we can figure out what’s going on.” I then saw another car pull up and Tim run out to me.
“No, I tired of listening to you! All you have done is ruin my life!” I looked over and Tim. “C’mon, I’m leaving.”
I started to walk over to one of the other vehicle that Tim was just in and got into the drivers seat. Tim got on the other side, but Michael stopped before I could close the door.
“You aren’t going anywhere. I know you are angry with me, but you and your brother going out on your own is a bad idea.” He paused. “I don’t want to risk you getting hurt when I could’ve protected you.”
I then sat down in the drivers seat and looked up at him. “Just like you protected me from getting beaten. You weren’t their for me, only after when I was left for dead. You never stopped him from beating me or raping me. I’m better off by myself rather being protected by you.”
I could see the hurt in Michael’s eyes. I knew he hated himself for happened to me. I knew it was gonna hurt him, but it was the only way he was going to let go of the door and let me leave.
I slammed the door shut, started the car and drove off.
“Where are we going exactly?” Tim asked after a few moments of silence.
“I don’t know. Anywhere, but here.” I said as we drove down the long road ahead of us.

If you can’t wait until the next chapter, feel free to check it out on Wattpad. Just search katieannsehl, and not only will you find this book, but other works that are either finished or I’m currently working on. 

Chapter 16:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/24/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-16/

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: The Secret Behind Shrek Forever After

If you have no idea what ‘Shrek’ is, then I highly recommend you check it out the entire series. Growing up, the Shrek series was something that we watched, almost on a daily, but in the last movie, of the saga, I noticed something.

So, if you haven’t watched all the movies, I’m going to break down the first 3 real quick:

Image result for shrek

  1. Shrek: In the first Shrek, we meet Shrek and how he is an ogre who lives alone in his swamp, but that is taken from him when the outlawed fairy tale creatures decide that they are going to stay on Shrek’s land. So, Shrek goes to the person who banned them onto his swamp, when arriving to Lord Farrquad castle, Farrquad sets him on a quest to rescue Princess Fiona, so that Lord Farrquad can marry her and become king. Long story short, Fiona and Shrek start to fall in love and Shrek finds out about her curse and how after sunset, she turns into an ogre.
    1. Shrek fell in love with Fiona, regardless of who the were on the outside. Mortal of this story is that your true love can be in anyone.
  2. Shrek 2: We see Fiona and Shrek go off and enjoy their honeymoon, at the end of the last movie, they got married. When the real Prince Charming comes to save her, he finds out that she has already been saved and that she just got married. Shrek and Fiona get invited to Far Far Away for Fiona’s father to give his blessing on the marriage. Shrek and the King don’t get along very well because Prince Charming was suppose to rescue Fiona. The King follows the orders of the Fairy Godmother and tries to get rid of Shrek, by hiring an hit man, Puss n Boots. Shrek then steals a potion, thinking that Fiona would better off by being human and together, they both transform into a human. Charming tries to ‘pretend’ to be Shrek. At the end, the King saves Shrek’s life and gives his blessing.
    1. Shrek didn’t have a very good relationship with his father-in-law, but because the King and Queen assumed that it would be Prince Charming instead. The real mortal of the story is that Shrek transformed into an human to make Fiona happy, but when he realizes that she loved him for him and that deep down, Fiona embraced being an ogre.
  3. Shrek The Third: In this one, Shrek and Fiona are going all the royal duties because the King has been sick. Shrek realizes that he would rather be back home in his swamp. On the Kings deathbed, he tells Shrek of the last air for the throne, giving Shrek and Fiona another option if they just wanted to live their lives back at the swamp. Shrek, Donkey, and Puss leave Far Far Away to go get Arthur, the next air. Fiona tells him that she is pregnant. Shrek has nightmares about being a father because his father wasn’t really in the picture much. Shrek basically practices on Arthur on how to become a father and saves Arthur’s life when Charming over rules the kingdom. Charming puts on a play where he wants to kill Shrek in front of everyone, but Arthur saves Shrek’s life and takes his role to be King, while Shrek and Fiona go home with 3 new babies.
    1. I think the mortal of the story was more for those who think they are going to be terrible parents when they find out that their spouse is pregnant. Sometimes they think that having kids would ruin their life, but Shrek learned that they make life better.

 

Now, that you kinda have a background on what each movie is about, we are finally, going to talk about the last movie from the Shrek Saga, Shrek Forever After.

As an adult, when you have kids, you tend to watch a lot of movies that you used to watch when you were a kid. The Shrek Series was something we watched all the time. My daughter loves anything animated and she doesn’t mind to watch them with me.

Well, when we finally got to the last current Shrek movie, I noticed something that I wouldn’t have noticed when I was a kid. Shrek embraces the parenting life, but when he realizes that he can’t always have some peace and quiet, and that things would go back to the way they were.

Image result for shrek family

Shrek feels that he his living in a boring life that seems it would never end, but he has enough, at his kids birthday party. When him and Fiona go outside to talk about, he tells Fiona how he wished he could have his swamp life back. Rumpelstiltskin overhears and offers Shrek a “Ogre For A Day”, meaning Shrek would be able to live a day as an ogre, but he would have to give a day to get a day.

Shrek tells Rumple that he can have any day from his childhood, Rumple takes the day he was born as payment. Shrek enjoys his time as an ogre, but he finds a poster with the Fiona’s face wanted, he looks to find her, but gets captures by Rumple and finds out that after his day is up, he’ll be gone, unless he has true loves first kiss.

Shrek finds Fiona and finds out that she recused herself from the tower. Shrek tries everything to have Fiona fall in love with him, all over again. Before his day is up, Fiona kisses him, and realized that he was her true love because he broke her curse.

Image result for shrek family

When Shrek gets back, he realizes how happy he was with his little family and that there was nothing he wouldn’t change about it.

You see, when you have kids, you thing that its going to be so easy and that you will still be able to do whatever you want, but once they are here, you might feel overwhelmed or wished you would have waited to have them.

I felt that way, but when I let my daughter spend the night with her grandmother, I missed her like crazy, even if I spent the time alone with my fiance, we both missed her like crazy.

Sometimes, having kids brings people closer together, other times, they can bring people to stay away or not want to be apart of it.

Having kids doesn’t ruin your life, it does change it. Some people, its the end of the world, but for me, they are a product of my fiance and I’s love for each other that we get to show the world.

Image result for shrek family

There is nothing in this world I would rather have than my wonderfully unperfect, little family. Just like Shrek found out, even though he found out the hard way, but he found that his little family was worth fighting for.

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 13)

My Secret Love Book Cover

If you haven’t read chapter 12, here is the link:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/10/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-12/

 

~Chapter 13~

I woke up the next morning, alone. I sat up, hugging the sheets to my body. My head was killing me. What the hell happened last night?  I realized that my clothes were everywhere.
I got up, wrapping the sheet around me, as I got up and tried to gather my clothes. I walked over to the window and looked outside. The sun was shining bright today. As I looked down, I saw Michael, working on a car outside, shirtless.
He looked up and saw me in the window, smiling. He then looked like he was coming inside. I quickly got dressed. It was completely wrong. I thought to myself. I then grabbed my phone and walked down the stairs, walking in front of Michael.
“Morning beautiful.” Michael said as he tried to kiss me, but I pushed him away. He looked confused. I walked over to my brother, who looked at both of us, knowing that he heard everything from last night.
“Awkward.” Tim said as he walked up the stairs. I headed for the front door, but Michael grabbed my arm.
“What the hell is wrong with you? We make love and you act like it never happened?”
“Because it was a mistake, Mikey. I should’ve never slept with you last night.” I pulled from his grip and walked out the front door with him following right behind me.
“What doesn’t make sense? Please tell me, Elizabeth.” He paused as I sat down on the swing, that was on the deck.
“We should’ve never done anything at all. I can’t keep doing this, having my hopes up and then you leaving me like you did before. I can’t have my heart go through this anymore.” I started to cry a little. “I just can’t, Mikey.”
He sat down on the swing and hugged me. I got up, I wasn’t going to let him comfort me. As much as I wanted him to, I just couldn’t.
“I didn’t leave because of you, if that’s what you were thinking.” He paused. “I left because I had to, not because I wanted to.”
“Then why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because of your father. He was going to have me killed.” My heart dropped. My father wanted to kill him? I knew my father hated him, but having him killed was just wrong. “The night we made love for the very first time and your father caught us. He was planning on having me killed. My boys got me out alive, but I felt like a fucking asshole for leaving you there. I tried to go back and explain, but when I saw you with Justin, and how happy you were, I just couldn’t.”

He placed his head in his hands. I got down on both of my knees and pulled his head up slowly.
“Why didn’t you?” I asked. Our eyes met. He placed his hand on my check.
“I didn’t want to break your heart more than I did before.” He then kissed my forehead. “I’m not gonna push you anymore to love me. I already feel like a dick for bring that girl over last night. We didn’t do anything, if you wanted to know.”
I felt a little relieved. He stood up, helping me up. I wanted to kiss him, but I needed time. I needed time to think about everything. “I need to think about it before I jump into anything.”
“If space is what you need, I’ll give you all the time and space you need. I just want to do this one more time, if it is my last.” He said, pushing my hair to the side and slowly coming closer, kissing me.
The spark that we had since we were younger, never changed. The only thing that did was time. I didn’t push him away or stop him. It felt right. He kept kissing me, until he pulled away before we did anything else that we might regret.
I froze, watching him walk down the porch to the car that he was working on. I touched my lips and smiled, I couldn’t help but smile. The one thing that wouldn’t leave my mind, was that kiss.

If you can’t wait to read another chapter, feel free to check it out on Wattpad. Just search my username, katieasehl, and you’ll find this book and other books that I am currently working on or are finished.

Chapter 14:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/17/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-14/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 12)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Very Mature Content! Read at your own risk!*

If you haven’t read Chapter 11, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/07/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-11/

 

~Chapter 12~

I circled on an ad for a bank clerk job. I wanted to try something new. I took a sip of coffee and looked at the clock. It was only 10 in the morning. I was still in my pj’s with my hair in a messy bun.
As I was scanning the news paper, Michael walked in, with no shirt and sweat pants. He walked over to the coffee maker and pour himself a cup of coffee.
“What you doing?” He asked as he turned around and leaned over the island. “Looking for a job, huh?” He asked as I circled one that said bartender.
“Yeah, why?” I took another sip of my coffee. Michael then lifted my chin up so that I was facing him.
“You look sexy as hell.” He grinned at me. I rolled my eyes at him and looked back down to the newspaper. He looked down at one of the ads I had circled. “Don’t work at a nightclub. I don’t want other guys hitting on you.”
I finished my coffee and got up and poured myself another cup. “I’m single. I’ll do whatever I want with who ever I want.” I walked back over and took the newspaper and looked back over to Michael. “By the way, that thing I said last night, I didn’t mean it.”
He smiled and looked to me. “That’s fine, but there’s one thing that I gonna do.” He walked over me.
“That is?” I asked.
“I’m gonna make you fall in love with me all over again.” He then kissed my forehead and sat down at the island.
I walked up the stairs and walked into my room. Sat down at my desk and kept looking in the ads, but I ended up falling asleep on my desk. I didn’t sleep very well last night.
In fact, I haven’t slept very well the past couple of days, but the more sleep I could get, the better. Just to keep my mind off of everything, especially Justin. My fear was that he was going to find us and that would be it, I wouldn’t be able to have my own life.
I woke up an hour later, got dressed and then grabbed the newspaper, I was just about to leave, when I bumped into Michael. He glared up and down me, a grin appeared on his face. I wasn’t even wearing anything that was sexy, but then I realized that my cleavage was showing.
“Really?” I said, rolling my eyes at him and then walked away.
“Where you going, especially looking like that?” He stopped me before I started to go down the stairs. “You’re not going out to go get other guys are you? I’ll kick their ass, just like I did the other night.”
I pulled away from his grip and walked away, ignoring him. I didn’t want to deal with this crap today. I was really getting tired of this jealously, but it was kinda cute that he got so jealous. He didn’t get jealous when I was dating Justin.
Then again, Justin was more jealous of Michael, due to how close we were. Justin was even more jealous with how close I was with my brother.
I walked down the stairs and walked out the front door. As I got outside, my brother was on the porch, tanning on one of the lawn chairs. He smiled at me as I returned the smile.
“If I knew you were going to be tanning, I wouldn’t be job hunting.” I said, putting on my sunglasses, since it was really bright and hot today.
“Well, I went to ask you, but you were asleep.” He laughed, I looked on my phone and realized that it was Saturday. “Hunny, you have been job searching for days, you need to relax.”
I had just started job searching since yesterday, but knowing my brother, he likes to overthink things. “I’ve been doing it since yesterday, but since it’s Saturday,  you wanna go watch topless guys play volleyball on the beach?”
“I thought you would never ask! I’ll go get the towels and everything else!” Tim jumped up so fast that I’ve never even seen him get up so fast.
I then realized that I forgot to put on my bathing suit and I really didn’t want to go back into the house. I took a deep breath and went back inside to my room.
I looked over all the bathing suits I had, but I couldn’t find my favorite red and pink bikini. I also tore my room apart until I jumped from hearing the door shut.
“Let me guess, you’re looking for this?” As I turned around, Michael was leaning on the back of my door, holding in his hand,  the bathing suit that I was looking for.
“Seriously? I don’t have time for this shit. Stop, Michael.” I said, I was tired with the mind games and I really didn’t want to deal with him right now. I grabbed the bathing suit from his hands. “Now go, and let me change.”
He wouldn’t move. I wasn’t going to wait for him to leave and by the time he does move, it would be too late to go tanning. “Nah, I think I’m gonna sit right here.”
“Fine then.” I then took off my t-shirt, he stared at me, he didn’t think I would do something like this, but I did. I then turned around, facing the wall, when I took off my bra. I felt his warm arms, hug around my waist.
He nibbled on my ear and whispered, “You are making this very hard for me.” He started placing kisses down my neck. He pulled me in closer and I could feel him getting harder. “I know you want me and I want you.”

Then my brother knocked on the door, thank god. “You getting your bathing suit on?” Tim asked.
“Yeah, I’ll be down in a minute.” I said as Michael let go of me.
“Okay, I’m gonna grab us some Bud Light Strawberitas and I’ll be waiting for you outside!” Michael turned and faced me.
“Okay.” He looked at me, as I was still covering my breasts. I then put on my bikini top and slowly pulled my shorts and panties down. “I’ve got to go.” I quickly put on my bottoms and grabbed a summer dress to go over my bathing suit.

“Wait.” He stopped me as I got to the door. “I know that you probably want nothing to do with me, but I was wondering if we could hang out tonight.”
I was just about to answer him, but then he spoke again. “I know that I fucked some things up with us ever having a future together, but I’ll understand if you don’t want to. You don’t have to give me a straight answer, I’ll be in my room.” I opened the door and walked out.
“I can’t believe it started to rain!” Tim said as we ran for cover for the house. “What time is it?” I checked my phone as I took a sip of my Strawberita, it was only 8pm.
“It’s only 8, why?” I said as we walked into our house.
“Netflix marathon of Bones.” He said as he took another drink and headed upstairs. I was soaking wet, but I then thought to what Michael said earlier.
Maybe I should go see him? What’s so wrong about hanging out? I then went into my bedroom and changed into some dryer clothes. I then slowly approached Michael’s door. I knocked and heard his voice.
Michael came to the door and saw me. “Hey.” He was only wearing boxers. He then closed the door behind him. “What’s up?” He sounded drunk, but I heard something that I really didn’t expect. “Michael, can you get me another drink?” I heard a female’s voice say.
“Well, you told me if I wanted to hang out with you to come to your room, but you look busy, I’ll come back later.” I said as walked down the stairs and grabbed a couple more of the Strawberita’s. I don’t know why, but it hurt.
Hearing another girl in his room or just even picturing him with another girl, I just couldn’t picture it. I didn’t want to feel this way. I kept thinking about it and it just wouldn’t go away. I sat at the island, and was about to down my drink when I saw him.
“I’m really sorry I forgot.” Michael said as he tried to hug me, but I didn’t want anything to do with him. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong? Are you really going to ask me that?” I yelled.
“Yes, because you said you didn’t care, so I found someone who cared.” He said, as opened my third one and started to down it. “Stop that, Elizabeth.” He pulled the drink away from me. I got up and took back my drink.
“You don’t get to tell me w-w-what I can and can’t do.” I said. I my drink back up to my room and slammed the door. I downed the rest of my drink and I was starting to really feel drunk now.
Michael opened the door and closed it shut. I threw the can at him as he tried to hug me, but I kept fighting. He the pinned me down to the bed.
He was too strong for me to escape. I had my eyes closed as I was pinned down. “Look at me. Look at me!” Michael yelled. “Fuck, You need to make up your fucking mind! Do you love me or not?”
When he asked me that, I opened my eyes and stared into his. I didn’t say anything. “If you don’t love me, I’ll get off, but if you do, you need to tell me. Otherwise, I’ll go back in my room and fuck that girl again.”
“Get off, please.” I said, he looked heart broken, but pissed.
“Fine.” He got off of me, but I stood straight up and grabbed his arm. He pulled away and closed the door shut.
I sat on the bed crying as I said. “Why do I have to love him so much?” I kept crying as the door opened. Michael closed the door and I stood up. “What do you want now, g-go back to your-“, he press his lips to mine and I pulled him in closer.
“I don’t want her. I want you.” He said as he kept kissing me. His hands started moving up and down. “Do you want this, as badly as I have?”
“Stop talking and just do it.” I said as he pressed harder on my lips, taking off my tank top and pj shorts. I only had my bra and underwear on. He carefully brought me down on my bed. Kissing me slowly down my neck and nibbling my ear.
I moved my hands over his boxers as I felt him getting hard. I moaned when his hand touched my spot. He moved his fingers around and it drove me crazy. He pulled down my panties and his boxers as he then rubbed his dick in my entrance, he kept doing that and it was driving me nuts.
“Fuck me, already!” I yelled. Michael grinned. I could see that he was enjoying doing what he was doing.

“You’re so wet, baby.” He then finally put him into me. He didn’t start thrusting until he asked me if this was okay, I nodded my head yes, once I gave him the okay, he thrusted into me as hard as he could.
I moaned with pleasure. He kept hitting my spot, as I moaned louder, the bed board hitting the wall so hard from him thrusting that I thought that he was gonna break the door.
He looked down at me and stopped thrusting, when he noticed I was struggling to take my bra off. “I got it.” he said, ripping it open and throwing it to the side.
“You owe me a new bra.” I said as he grinned.
“Don’t you worry about that.” He said as he thrusted harder, “Come, baby. Come for me.” He went faster. I moaned louder. As we both finished. He laid on top of me while we both took a minute to catch our breath.
Michael then rolled over next to me and lifted the blanket over us. I moved over and laid on his chest. “God, I missed that.” Michael said as I giggled.
“Me too.” I said as we looked out my window that faced the ocean. Michael started to play with my hair and planted a kiss on my forehead.
“I love you. I always have and always will.” Michael said. He was about to get out of bed, but I stopped him.
“Stay with me, please?” I asked as Michael laid back down. I fell asleep in his arms, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. And I whispered back to him.
“I love you, Mikey.”

If you can’t wait until the next chapter to be out, feel free to check it out on Wattpad! Just search my username katieasehl and not only will you find this book, but you will find other of my other finished and current books that I am working on. 

Chapter 13:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/14/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-13/

Posted in Gaming

TS2 – Something Unexpected (Getting To Know The Characters)

Hey dearies! So, if you haven’t since on my Facebook and Twitter, I have just completed my first EVER Sims 2 Series! This is one of the big projects that I have been working on and I wanted to give you guys, more info on my characters.

So, I loved watching Sims 2 series ALL the time! To this day, I still watch them. There are some of my favorites that have stopped because they either were done making them or just didn’t have enough time to create them because they have grown up.

Now, that I finally have gotten my hands on the Sims 2, for the past couple months, I have been adding content, mods, watching videos, learning to film, and just playing around with the Sims 2. I don’t know why or what it is, but Sims 2 Series is just amazing, to me.

I finally had a script, for the very first episode and finally had time to create it! If you want to check out the very first episode of Something Unexpected, check out the link:

I got the idea from actually, one of my books, Something Unexpected. You guys might not have seen it on my blog, yet, but it was a book that I just finished and it was about a girl who has always listened to her parents, but when the ‘bad boy’ of the school enters her life, she stands up for herself and takes the time to find herself.

I will point out that this series and the book are NOT the same. The only big thing, that will be the same, is their names and some plots from the story itself. The book version, is a little too dirty for me to make with the Sims 2, so I figured I would change the plot and script a little bit.

Now, I will be completely honest with you, it isn’t the best, but I am a beginner and in order for me to improve is to fix or change the way I film or any of that. Basically, I am going to learn from my mistakes from each video I produce. So, let’s get into a little bit about the cast!

Characters:

  • Madison ‘Maddie’ (16)
    • She is the ‘main character’ of this story. She’s very creative and smart, top of her class. Her parents are like normal, not so much her mother, she give Madison a little bit of a hard time because of how she is. Madison doesn’t have very many best friends, other than Sami, so she took a chance and went on an online chatroom, that’s when she met Xajacks42(otherwise known as Jax, but she doesn’t know yet).
    • Family: Her parents, Daniel and Connie, are still married, but their relationship has been rocky because of how strict Connie is to their children. Madison also has a little sister, Fiona, she always wants Madison’s attention.
  • Jackson ‘Jax’ (17)
    • He is the bad boy of the school. Always gets into trouble and is kind of a ‘lady’s man’, but he is dating one of the most popular girls in school (go figure). He plays video games and met MadMadis88(Madison, but he doesn’t know yet either.) in an online chatroom. He usually has party’s, a lot, at his house, so he hangs out with his best friend, Nathan.
    • Family: He lives with his dad, Jim, but he is barely home, due to being a business man. His mother died when Jax was 9, from a car accident.
  • Nathan ‘Nate’ (16)
    • He is Jax’s best friend. Lives with his parents. He doesn’t really have many hobbies, other than sports. He has a huge crush on Madison, due to her father and his father are best friends and business partners to a major company. He actually finds out that Jax is talking to Madison and uses it to blackmail one of them (Not going to say because it would ruin the series for you.)
    • Family: His parents are all about business. They love their son, but plan on using Nathan crush to keep the family business to stay in the family.
  • Sami (16)
    • Best friends with Madison, they have been friends since they both started school. Sami is, what you would say, a ‘tree hugger’ and a artist. She lives with her mom and brother, but has a part time job, to help keep the family afloat.
  • Savannah (17)
    • The ‘popular girl’ of school. She is all about Jax and doesn’t ever want to let him go. She is also the ‘school slut’, since she used to cheat on Jax with other classmates. She really doesn’t like Madison, just because she is the ‘school nerd’ and that her brother has a huge crush on her. Basically she is annoyed with how much her brother talks about her. She lives with her parents, and older brother.

There you have it! Just a little bit about my characters. This is going to be a working progress, so bare with me when I try to upload a new episode every month. That’s the goal, but if there is any issues, I’ll post on my twitter and Facebook page to let you guys know!

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 11)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Mature Content! Read at your own risk!*

If you haven’t read Chapter 10, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/03/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-10/

 

~Chapter 11~

After lunch, Tim and I walked over to the ticket booth a bought a few tickets to go on a couple rides. We walked over to the Tilt-a-Whirl and waited in line.
“I haven’t been on this ride in years!” Tim said, as I thought back to when we were younger. Our parents never allowed us to go on amusement rides. Michael would sneak us out and hung out at the town fair all night.
“It’s been a while.” The ride finally stopped so we could go on. Tim and I both spotted number 3 as the fast spinner. Once we were in, it felt like yesterday that we were going on the Tilt-a-Whirl for the first time.
We both laughed as we were spinning faster and faster, until the ride came to a complete stop. Once we got off the ride, we were still laughing, but when I looked down the boardwalk, I saw Michael, walking towards us.
My god did he look hot. Wearing long jean pants and a black tank top that really showed more of his figure. I turned to Tim, as he turned and saw Michael.
“You need a drink?” I asked. Tim nodded and we walked off to the bar. I started to walk faster.
“Question. Why are we avoiding Michael?” Tim asked and I placed a devilish look on my face.
“That’s for me to know and you to find out.” I turned my head to the side. “Karma’s a bitch.”
The bar was pretty packed for a Tuesday night. Tim and I head right over to the bar.
“4 shots over here.” Tim asked and pointed to where we were. The bartender quickly came over and poured us our shots. “Hunny, slow down.”
Tim said as I had just pounded all four shots down. He looked puzzled, but didn’t say anything.
“What are you trying to do?” He asked. I called over the bartender to make a Sex on the Beach, then looked back to Tim.
“I’m going to prove a point.” The bartender handed me my drink and I took a sip. Tim still looked confused.
“What do you mean?” Then Tim thought about it and his eyes got really big. “Oh, no. No, please don’t do what I think you are going to do. You are just gonna piss him off even more than he already is.”
I walked to the middle of the dance floor, I started dancing solo, until I felt a guy start to grind on me. “You are fine as hell.” The mystery guy whispered in my ear. “You with anybody? I’m really not in the mood to get my ass beat.”
“Only me and my brother, who is over by the bar.” I turned around and looked at the guy. He was cute with his blond messy hair and amazing green eyes. I whispered in his ears. “By the way, I didn’t catch a name.”
He whispered back, “Dylan.” He then pulled me close as I turned around, grinding all over him. I caught Michael staring.
“Elizabeth.” I answered. I turned and faced Dylan. “Do you want to go outside?”
Dylan smiled and nodded. I grabbed his hand as we exited the club, but before I left, Michael was following us. “Is he your ex?” Dylan asked as we kept walking down the board walk.
“We never really dated. Just best friends, but I’m getting back at him.” I probably shouldn’t of said that, but Dylan seemed into it.
“What did you have in mind?” I saw the house coming closer.
“You’ll see.” I said, I turned back to see where Michael was at, but he far enough so that he can’t stop it in time. We walked up the stairs, that lead to the deck. I turned and faked a smile. “Kiss me. Now.”
Dylan pressed his lips against mine. Then his tough slowly slipped in. I started getting turned on a little, but the moment was ruined when Michael pulled me away from him.
“What the hell, Michael!” I yelled. He was pissed. He looked at me and I  could tell that it hurt him. He then turned to Dylan and started throwing a punches. I ran back over to them and tired pulling Michael off Dylan. “Cut it out, Michael!” I screamed, and he threw one last punch and then looked at me, frowning.

“Get inside.” He commanded, but I didn’t move. Instead, I got down and checked on Dylan. His face with horrible. “Get the fuck inside! We need to talk. NOW!” He yelled.
“No! Fuck off!” I said, but he threw me over his shoulders. He turned to Dylan and gave him an evil stare. “I’m so sorry that this happened to you.” I told Dylan, but I could see that he understood.
Michael still had me over his shoulders as he went into my room. Threw me on my bed and slammed the door.
“What the fuck was that?” He yelled. I rolled my eyes. He just got more pissed at me.
“Karma is a bitch and you deserved it.” I got up and walked over to the door, but Michael was blocking it. “Move!”
“No, you aren’t running away from this. We are gonna have a nice long talk about this.” He then pointed to me to sit on the bed. “Why are you such a pain in my ass?”
I sat down at the foot of the bed. “Why are you such a jackass?” I giggled.
“This isn’t funny. Why would you do that? And in front of me? What were you thinking?” He crossed his arms. I really didn’t want to be questioned tonight.
“I wasn’t thinking. I just wanted to have some fun.” I said, taking everything out of my pockets. “Are we done? I would like to change and go to bed.”
“No, we aren’t done.” I then got up and picked out some sweats and a t-shirt. “I said we aren’t done talking, Elizabeth.”
“I know, okay? Turn around, I’m gonna change, since you won’t leave.” As soon as I said that, he turned around and faced the wall.
I slowly let my pants slide down as Michael just kept talking. I pulled my shirt over my head, the only clothing I had on were a thong and a bra.
“I just can’t believe yo-.” Michael had turned around before I could put my pj’s on. “Damn.” Michael’s mouth dropped as he saw what I was wearing.
“Are you gonna keep staring or let me get dressed?” I asked as I grabbed the sweat pants and pulled them on.
“I’d like to do something else.” I then threw over a red plan tee. It fitted me to my body figure, which I liked and could see that Michael was liking it too.
“Well, that’s not going to ever happen, again.” I said, getting into my bed. “I’d like to see you try.” I smirked as I laid in bed, ready to fall asleep.

“I’ll take that challenge.” He opened the door and grind to me.”
I then realized what I said. “I was just joking about that.” I said before he left. “I was kidding. There is no challenge.” But knowing Michael, even if I was joking, he’s always won. I won’t let him win this time.

If you can’t wait until the next chapter to be out, you can always check out my story on Wattpad. Just search katieasehl, and you’ll find this book and a few others that are finished or I am currently working on. 

Chapter 12:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/10/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-12/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 10)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning Mature Content* Read at your own risk!

If you haven’t read Chapter 9, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/31/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-9/

 

~Chapter 10~

“Why did I drink to much?” I asked myself as I had just finished puking in the toilet. I got up and changed into a pair of shorts and a purple tank top. I usually don’t wear tank tops, but today was just hot.
I walked down the stairs and into the kitchen to find that I was the only one up. As I looked at the clock, it was only 11:43 a.m., Michael had just  walked in. His dark orange hair was wet and he was only wearing a towel.
“Morning.” He said as I turned and started to make coffee. “Coffee? Don’t you only drink only iced coffee?”
I turned the coffee machine on and looked right at him. “I do, but I drink both.”
Michael came over with three coffee cups and placed them next to the coffee machine. I could help but notice that he rubbed right up against me. I closed my eyes and counted to five. As I turned around, I touched something that I didn’t mean to touch.
He came closer to me, pushing up his boner against me. “Why did you do that?” He whispered into my ear. “Your getting me hard.” He then kissed my ear and then started to bite softly against my neck.
He was turning me on, not in a bad way, but a good way. Flashes of Justin raping me, made me pull away.

“I can’t.” I said as I then ran up to my bedroom and started to cry into my pillow.
Why do the flashes keep coming back of what Justin did? All I felt was pain and how Justin held me down, as I tired to break free. I shook my head and cried some more.
A couple minutes later, some one knocked on my door. “Go away!” I said, then just kept crying more. The door opened and then closed shut.
“Please Elizabeth, talk to me.” I heard Michael’s voice. He started to rub my back, which felt very relaxing. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No.”
“Okay, what is it?” Michael asked again. Then I heard my brother come in.
“Michael. Just drop it.” Tim said and then handed him a note. I sat up, until I saw Michael’s face when he read it. He was about to say something, but Tim interrupted. “Don’t.”
“Don’t what?”
“You know what?”
“Why not, that fucking asshole deserves it!” Michael said, then turned to look at me. “Why didn’t you tell me? I knew something was wrong, but I thought it was him just beating you.”
Tim left the room and it went silent.
“How could I tell you? Are you serious?” I then got out of bed and faced him. “You didn’t give two shits about me until now. It’s been years since I’ve seen you and all of a sudden you care? You told me that you never loved me and never wanted to see me ever again, but look where we are now-,” Michael pulled me in and kissed me.
I felt warm and happy. That spark that you get when you kiss someone special, but I pulled away.
“No, you can’t keep doing this, Mikey!” I said, sitting down at the end of the bed as Michael joined me as well.
“I left because I got scared of you loving me.” He said, holding my hand in his.
“Why didn’t you told me how you felt?” I asked, he looked into my eyes.
“I’m a guy. You know how hard it is to express my feelings.” I laughed a little bit.
“You could’ve at least told me how you felt, before you left.”
“I’m sorry.” He said, but I grabbed my purse and just left. I walked right out of the door towards the board walk.
I texted my brother to meet me at the video arcade that they had by the board walk. I walked right in, exchanged my ones for quarters, and walked right to one of my favorite games, Guitar Hero.
I popped a dollar of coins into the machine and selected one of my favorite songs to play, Cliffs of Dover.
As I was playing, I swung the guitar around and knocked someone out. As I turned around, Tim got back up and rubbed his head.
“So much for trying to scare you.” He said as I finished a song. “Hungry? I’m craving a juicy burger and a milkshake.”

I laughed as I put the guitar back in it’s spot and we walked out. “Where do you want to go? Somewhere away from the house.”
“It’s a surprise.” He smiled and we kept walking down the board walk to a small bar/restaurant that was right next to a t-shirt shop. We walked right up to the bar. “Isn’t this cute?”
“Adorable.” Then one of the waiters came over and asked us what we wanted. Once she got our orders, she left to go get our drinks.
Tim then turned to me and smiled. “So what happened after I left?” I rolled my eyes.
“Same old bullshit.” I said, but Tim knew that I was hiding something and crossed his arms. “Okay, okay. I’ll tell you.”
The waiter came back with my strawberry Mike’s Hard and Tim a Twisted Tea. I took a sip and then took a deep breathe.
“Keep this between us. Michael tried making a move on me, but I pushed him away because he triggered a flash back of Justin raping me.”
Tim hugged me as a small tear fell from my eyes. “It’s okay. He must of touched you a way that brought that flashback.”
“I don’t know, but Michael is being a pain in the ass.” I took another sip and then spoke, again. “Saying that he left because he was afraid that someone would actually love him, but he comes back now and wants to fix everything.”
“Well, he must really love you to do all the stuff he did for you.” The waiter came with our food. “Thanks, hunny.” Tim said to the waiter as she smiled at Tim.
“He has a weird way of expressing it.”

If you can’t wait for the next chapter, feel free to check it out on Wattpad. Just search my username, katieasehl, not only will you find this book, but other’s that I am currently working on or finished. 

Chapter 11:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/07/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-11/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 9)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Mature Content*

If you haven’t ready Chapter 8, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/27/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-8/

 

~Chapter 9~

“Girl, you look so awesome!” Tim said as the hair dresser pulled the towel away from my head to release my new long dark red hair. “I love it!”
“I thought it was time for a change.” I said stepping out of the chair and paying the hair dresser. Tim dyed his hair blond and had it cut enough so he could style the front with gel.
“Now, where to?” Tim asked as we walked down the street, we passed a clothing store and Tim stopped. “Omg, Eliza, that outfit will look amazing on you!”
It was a a shirt that covered one shoulder and it was big enough for it to hang on the over shoulder. It also had a tank top underneath and a short pair of shorts.
We went in and bought that for me and Tim got some yellow neon bright sunglasses. I laughed when I saw Tim with his glasses on and then we heard the beats from a nightclub, just down the street from where we were.
It wasn’t late enough to go dancing, so we figured that going down to the beach and chilling there until the sun came down, sounded like a wonderful idea.
We sat down in the sand, just watching the waves crash against the beach. Tim turned and smiled at me, I smiled back.
“I know that you didn’t want to talk about it, but I just want to say thank you. Thank you for standing up to me.” Tim grabbed my hand he then looked back towards the ocean. “I really thought that you were a goner, when we brought you to the hospital.”
“I know.” I then felt my left side, my fingers brushed up against my cheek, feeling the small scar. I flashed back to Justin just beating me. I shook my head and turned to Tim. “How bad was I?”
“It was bad, but you’re a fighter. I just never want to see you like that. Ever. I mean it.” Tim looked serious, but I couldn’t help, but laugh. He then started to chuckle.
Tim looked around, as the sky was getting darker. He smiled and stood up. “You ready to party!?” He asked as he helped me up and I grinned.

“Hell yeah!” I yelled as we walked down to the night club.
The music was loud, but the beat was jumping. Tim and I just danced, until he fell down. He looked at me, his face was so red. “Ready for another one?” Tim asked.
I nodded as I watched him walk over to the bar. I then went back to dancing. That was until I felt a hand run down my arm. I started to grind on him to the beat. He spun me around and both of our hands were connected. I looked up and all I could see is his hair. He leaned in and said, “Keep shaking your ass like that and you’ll get unwanted attention.”
Under his hoodie, I saw him grin. I knew exactly who it was. I leaned in and whispered, “It got your attention, didn’t it?” I then walked over to the bar to find Tim talking to some guy. I figured that I would leave them be, so I found a spot on the other side of the bar.
“What can I get for you?” The bartender asked as I handed him my I.D.
“2 shots of whiskey. ” As I said that, I felt hands hug my waist.
“How about we go outside?” Michael as he whispered in my ear. I turned and shook my head no. “You can bring a drink with you.”
I grabbed the two shots, handed one to Michael. I looked towards the bartender and asked him for a Sex on the Beach.
“You take this shot and I’ll go.” I said. I downed my shot just like it was water. Then he did, placed the shot glass on the bar and grabbed my hand, pulling me out of the club, with my drink in hand.
“Where are w-we going?” I asked. I started to feel really drunk. We then walked down the boardwalk and once we were up front of this beach house, Michael stopped and sat down in the sand. “W-who’s p-place is this?”
“Ours.” He then pulled out of his pocket a lighter and a joint. “Remember this?”
“Yeah, those were the good times.” He then put the joint in his mouth and lit it. Once he took a hit, he handed it to me.
“Why did you stop?” He asked. I took a hit and french in-hailed the smoke, then passed it to him.
“Two reasons. One, my parents are cops and two, Justin didn’t like me smoking.” I said as I took off my flip flops and shoved my toes in the sand.
“That’s right.” He went silent. I took another hits off the joint and then handed it to him. He then looked at me, “Why did you say yes?”
I thought about it and they only reason I could think of, was that I would be safe with him. That and I really did love him. I then took a deep breath. “I don’t know. I thought he would keep me safe and he is the only guy who loved me for me. I did love him. I don’t know.”
“He didn’t love you for who you were. He changed you into someone he wanted you to be.” I laid down in the sand. Looking up to the stars. I started to cry.
“I-I know. Why would he do that? Why would he hurt me? Why?” I looked over to Michael, he looked over and wiped the tears under my eyes. I sat up as we both gazed into each others eyes.
“Because he’s a worthless piece of shit. You deserve better.” He then took another hit off the joint and came closer to my lips. He then blew the smoke into my mouth. He pulled away and gentle touch the side of my cheek. I blew out whatever smoke was left and stood up.
“I think it’s t-time for me to go to sleep.” I said, grabbing my shoes and walking up towards the new place we will all be staying in, together.
Michael then helped me to bed and as soon as I laid down, I fell right asleep.

If you can’t wait for the next chapter to come out, feel free to check it out on Wattpad. Just search katieasehl and you’ll find this work and others that are either finished or I’m currently working on.

Chapter 10:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/09/03/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-10/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 8)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Mature Content*

If you haven’t read Chapter 7, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/24/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-7/

~Chapter 8~

I woke up to the sound of beeping.
Beep…Beep…Beep…Beep…
I opened my eyes and saw that I was in the hospital. I started to freak out, my heart started to race.
Beep.Beep.Beep.Beep.
A nurse came in and looked at the monitor. She looked at me and smiled.
“It’s alright, you need to calm down, ma’am.” She said as I started to calm down a little. “Now, if you can, remain calm. You came in late last night and your husband saw you on the floor, bleeding.”
My eyes watered. I couldn’t remember what happened. Last thing I remembered was Justin’s fist. I can’t remember what happened after that. “When can I leave?” I asked, I tried to sit up, but the nurse held me down, lightly.
“You need your rest and we aren’t sure when you will be able to leave. Only Dr. Lee can give you a better answer, but for now, I need you to relax and get some rest.” She tucked me in and then smiled. “If you need anything, the call button for a nurse is right here on the inside of your bed. Feel free to use it.”
She then left and as I was about to close my eyes, Michael came in and walked over to my bed and sat on the edge.
“How you feeling?” He said, grabbed my hand and held it in his. It felt nice and I gave him a small smile.
“I can’t remember what happened.”
“I saw the entire thing.” He then looked into my eyes. My eyes widen.
“You did. What happened?” I asked.
“I knew something was up and so I followed you home. You and him started to fight and then once he hit you, I called a couple of my boys and we went in to beat the shit outta him, but he had already left.” He turned away from him. “He left you there for dead, Elizabeth.”
I didn’t know what to say, other than I started to get upset and cry, again. I didn’t know what to think. “What did you do to Justin?”
“Well, one of my boys followed him to a couple houses down where you lived and we saw him kissing another woman.” He then turned to me and wiped the waterfall of tears that was pouring out of my eyes. “But don’t worry. I kicked his ass.” He smirked and I smiled a little more.
“Thank you.”
“No need to. It was my pleasure, but there’s something that I kinda did.” I looked at him and saw that he did what I know he’s been wanting to do for years. “I faked Tim’s death and yours.”
I looked confused because why would he risk faking our deaths if I’m currently in the hospital. “Won’t they find out?”
“Nope, they won’t find us because I changed Tim and yours name. Plus we are in the next state over.” He grinned.
“Is my brother safe?” Once I asked that, Tim walked right in and hugged me.
“Don’t you worry, hun. I am fine, but once you are ready to leave, we are going somewhere I’ve always wanted to go.” He smiled.
I left the hospital, after being there for one day, because we had to get a move on, before people figured out who we really were.
I smiled as we got off the plane. The sun was shining, the water was bright blue, and the breeze was perfect. Why didn’t Tim and I leave for the Bahamas sooner, I don’t know. Maybe because I thought that everything would be perfect with Justin, but I guess I was wrong.
I looked down at my hand and saw that Justin’s engagement ring was gone. I smiled. Deep down, I really did love him, but if I would’ve stayed with him, who knows what would happen. I could’ve died, for all I know.
“Mikey, sweetie! were are we staying at?” Tim asked as he dropped his bags in the back of the rental car.
“Don’t worry about it, enjoy yourselves. I’ll find you.” Michael then got into the rental car and drove off.
“I need a drink.” I said as Tim and I walked over to the bar that was right across where the boat dropped us off.
We sat down at the bar and ordered our drinks. “I’m glad we are here.” I said as the bartender handed us our drinks.
“Me too.” He said, taking a sip of his drink. “I’m just glad that you are safe. I can’t believe Justin did that to you. God, he makes me angry.”
“Can we please not talk about it? I just want to forget all about him tonight.” I took a sip and Tim smiled.
“Of course.” He then raised his glass and I raised mine. “Here’s to having a awesome night of getting drunk.” We tapped our glasses together and I said, “Cheers to that.”

If you can’t wait for the next chapter, feel free to check it out on Wattpad. Just search katieasehl, and you’ll find this book and a few others that are finished or I’m currently working on. 

Chapter 9:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/31/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-9/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 7)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Warning: Mature Content*

If you haven’t read Chapter 6, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/20/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-6/

~Chapter 7~

The few days, I stayed late at work, trying to pretend that everything was okay. But really, it wasn’t. My father came in as I was getting my stuff, I was just about to leave. Just seeing him, really scared me.
“So, how is everything?” He asked.
“Fine.” I said, putting on my jacket. Just looking at him just made me flash back to what he did last weekend. He’s hit us before, but never like that. It scared me very much.
“Well, Justin called and told me that you guys want to get married at the end of this month?”
“I guess.” I grabbed my bag and then headed for the door. “Listen, I’ve got to go. Justin will worry if I don’t get home on time.”
“Okay, well, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I then walked down to the parking lot and got into my car.
Once I was inside, I just started crying. I then checked my phone to see that I had missed Justin’s call. My phone went off again, as I just received a text message from Justin.
When can I expect u home?
I then clicked on his picture and called him.
“Where are you?” He didn’t sound too happy. “You’re late, why?”
I took and deep breath then spoke. “My dad wanted me to stay a little later. I’m sorry, I was going to text you, but I got caught up in paperwork.”
“Sure you did, now hurry home.” He hung up and I put my phone back in my pocket. I started my car and then saw that I was gonna run out of gas pretty soon. I pulled out of the parking garage and drove across the street to the gas station.
I parked at the second gas pump and turned off the car. When I went searching for my card, I couldn’t find it. Where was it? It had to be somewhere? I started to panic, until I find a note in my bag:
I got us a joint banking account, that card doesn’t work anymore. New cards will be in soon.
-Justin
Are you kidding me? I can’t believe that he did that and without my permission. I kept looking in my bag and thankfully, I had a twenty dollar bill.
I got out of the car and went inside to pay, but when I got out, Michael was pumping gas into my car.
I walked over, but he didn’t look at me, he just kept looking at the pump.
“Well, you look like crap.” He said, I stood next to him.
“I know, but I guess this is what my life is gonna be now.” I said. He turned to look at me.
“It doesn’t have to be. You have the power to change how you want your life to be.” He then turned back to the pump and placed it back where it was and closed up my gas tank. “So, how is your new soon-to-be ‘hubby’?”
“At home, which reminds me, I have to go.” I walked over to the drivers side and just as I was about to open the door, Michael shut it.
“Something is wrong with you. You’re not yourself.” I looked down. If I faced him, he would know that something was up.
“I’m fine, but I got to go. I’m already late.” I said as I tried to open the car door, but Michael was leaning on it. “Please, I have to go.”
I said as I looked up to him in his eyes and a tear fell from my cheek. He wiped my tear away and then moved out of the way. Before I got into my car, I looked back to him, as he was walking to his truck, that was next to my car.
“I know something is up and if he is hurting you, I’ll find out. Whether you tell me or not.”
“Where were you?!?” Justin yelled as I walked through the door and placed my bag on the couch. When I turned around, Justin slapped me. “You were cheating on me, weren’t you? You fucking slut!”
My eyes started to water, but I didn’t cry. I stood up and looked at him. “I wasn’t out cheating on you, I had to stop and get gas.” I then took a deep breath and then pulled out the little note he left me saying that he canceled my account. “First of all, if you wanted to have a joint banking account, you could’ve told me and the fact that you did it behind my back is even worst.”
“It doesn’t matter. You are going to be my wife and I figured why not do it now.”
“I can’t do this, Justin. I can’t.” I started to cry. “What happened to the man I fell in love with?”
“I’m right here.” He said as he came closer to me, making me walk backwards until my back hit the wall. “I haven’t changed. I’m still the same person.” He pulled me in to embrace me, I couldn’t escape. He then looked up at me and smiled.
“You’ve changed. You’re not the same man I fell in love with. Y-You’re a monster. I can never fall in love with a monster.” His face changed from smiling to becoming very pissed. He pushed me up against the wall, slapped me.
“Don’t you fucking say that again.” He said, then he threw me on the ground and punched me in the face. “You aren’t going to end this. I’m the only one who decides if this relationship is over and it isn’t.”
The only thing I remember was Justin’s fist and then it all went black.

As always, if you can’t wait for the next chapter to come out, you can always check it out on Wattpad. Just search katieasehl and you will not only find this book, but a few others that I have either finished or I’m currently working on. 

Chapter 8:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/27/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-8/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 5)

My Secret Love Book Cover

Another chapter for you all, dearies! I hope you enjoy. 

If you haven’t read Chapter 4, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/13/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-4/

~Chapter 5~

I was woken up by Justin, he was planting kisses down my arm. His hands started to travel down, but I stopped them. “No, let me sleep.” I said.
“It’s noon, babe. We are going shopping, remember?” He said as he got up and pulled the blanket off of me. I remember that before we went to bed, he had asked if I wanted to go with him to help pick out a gift for my mother’s birthday.
“I’ll get up in a few.”
“Come on, let’s go. We need to get that gift before tonight.” I was confused. Her birthday is next weekend. I sat up and checked my phone. When I went into my messages, my mom had sent me a text saying that they were throwing a party tonight because she and my father are going on a mini vacation the week of her birthday.
The only thing that pissed me off, is that Justin went through my phone, again. I have no problem with him going through my phone, but if he checks my messages, he should at least tell me if someone texted me.
I dropped my phone on the bed and went to go put some clothes on. “What’s wrong?” Justin asked. Seriously? I turned around after I had gotten dressed and faced him.
“I have no problem with you checked my phone, but if someone texts me, let me know.” I said as a grabbed my phone and walked through the kitchen. He grabbed my arm and turned me to face him.
“I’m sorry, but don’t get pissed off because I went through your phone. You to the same.”
“I did, but I trust you enough that I don’t need to check your phone, but when it comes to me, it’s a big deal. You know I don’t cheat.” I said. He was getting pissed. I could see it in his eyes. “But why do you always have to check my phone? Do you not trust me?”
He threw his hands through his black hair. Then looked at me. “Your mom told me about Michael. I heard he was back in town and I didn’t know if you were talking to him at all.”
“Are you kidding me? She told you everything and you’re worried that I’m gonna still talk to him?” I said crossing my arms. I’ve told him about Michael, I just never mention his name. “I want nothing to do with him after what he did to me.”
“She told me that he used to get you into lots of trouble and that your father caught you and him in a car, naked.” He paused, “I don’t want you around him. Last thing I don’t want to happen is him breaking us up.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Never mind, forget that I even said anything.” He turned and walked into the bedroom and came back into the kitchen with his jacket and car keys. I put my red leather jacket on and then he looked at me. “Look, I’m sorry. I have a lot going on with work and I’m taking it out on you, especially tonight.”
“What do you mean by that?” I asked, but he wouldn’t tell me as we walked down the stairs and out the apartment door. He opened the door for me and even when he got into the drivers seat, he was completely silent.
The entire ride there and back was silent. The only time we spoke was when we were getting a gift for my mother. Which we ended up getting her a scrapbook and a 50 dollar gift card to Krafty Krafts, which is a arts and crafts that its my favorite place to go.
Justin pulled into my parent’s drive way. We ended up going back home because he wanted me to change into something nice. He never asks me to do that, I feel that he’s up to something.
He gets out of the car and walks over to open my door. I smile, as he looks at me, he gives me a smile in return.
“Please talk to me. Why are you giving me the cold shoulder?” I said as he grabs my hand and walks me over to the two wooden swings that hung from the huge tree that was in front of my parents house. “Justin, what’s going on?” I asked, sitting down on one of the swings.
I looked up at him as he then got down on one knee and grabbed my hand. Oh my god, is he doing what I think he is doing? I felt my face getting goosebumps, as he was holding my hand.
“Elizabeth, I know I’ve been acting awkward all day, but it’s because I was so nervous to do this.” He then pulled out a tiny box and placed it in my hand. “Elizabeth, I love you so much and there isn’t anyone else I would rather spend my life with than you. I want to grown old together as we watch our children and grandchildren grown up. So what I’m asking is, will you marry me?”
My heart dropped. I was completely speechless and shocked. When he opened the box, there was a really pretty ring in there. My mouth dropped as I saw the ring. “Oh, Justin. It’s beautiful.”
He then took it out of the box and placed it on my hand. “I take it that was a yes?” I shook my head yes as he then kissed me. He then picked me up as I jumped into his arms, closing my eyes, but when I opened them, I saw Michael.
He was across the street from my parents house, standing in the road smoking. A tear fell from my cheeks as Justin put me down and kissed me, again.
“I love you so much.” Justin said, holding my hands tight. “Oh, babe, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”
“No, it’s okay, they are tears of joy. Plus the wind is also not helping.” I said.
“Right, let’s go inside.” As we walked to the door together. “By the way, this is our engagement party, it was my idea and your moms.”
I smiled, he went inside as I turned back to see if Michael was still there, but he wasn’t. My heart ached a little. I hated seeing that look on his face. Something tells me that this night was just the beginning.

If you can’t wait until Monday to read another chapter, feel free to check this, and many other of my works on Wattpad! Just search katieasehl, you’ll find all of the books I have read and ones that are currently in the working process!

Chapter 6:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/20/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-6/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 4)

My Secret Love Book Cover

Sorry guys for being late uploading this! Here is chapter 4!

If you haven’t read chapter 3, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/10/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-3/

~Chapter 4~

I woke up to a boy and a girl, jumping on the bed. They looked so much like me.
“Mommy, mommy! Wake up!” The little boy said as he tried pulling me out of bed. “Come on Mommy. Daddy says that we can open presents now.” The little girl said as I got out of bed and walked down the stairs, holding their little hands.
I walked into the living room to find a fully decorative tree, lights went all around the room. Then I saw him. He was grabbing a little box that was hidden underneath the tree. I sat done with the little ones, as they cuddled up close to me.
“Jacob. Lila. Can you give this to Mommy?” he said, handing the kids a tiny box. They gave it to me, but I still couldn’t see who it was.
As I opened the box, my eyes widen. No one knew what the meaning of this present, but two people. I knew what it was, so didn’t Michael. I picked up the necklace that had a shell, sand dollar, and a little bottle of sand.
My eyes started to water as he came closer to me. When I opened my eyes, it was Michael. I didn’t know what to think.
I woke up and looked around the room. I was still home. I sat up and checked the time then rubbed my eyes. Tanner was still sleeping and I slowly got out of bed and went into the living room. I looked towards the balcony and saw a figure.
I walked toward the glass doors to the balcony and then I saw him.
“What are you doing here, Michael?” I asked as I saw the faint grin that was coming off his face. His black hoodie was still over his head.
“What, no more Mikey?” He said.
“You need to go before Justin wakes up and sees you.”
“Or what? He’ll kick my ass? I doubt that. I’ve kicked his ass plenty of times.” He chuckled. I crossed my arms and gave him an disgusted look, but he came closer to me. “I’ve missed you, sweetheart and so haven’t you.”
“No, just leave, okay? I’m happy with Justin. I don’t need you to repeat the past.” I said as he took off his hood and I stared into his eyes. He brushed his hand up against my cheek. Chills went up my back, but it felt good.
“Okay, okay, I’ll just come back another time.” He pulled away and threw a hand through his hair. “I’ll be in town for awhile. I’ll come visit you when you’re in a better mood, but I can’t leave without this.”
He walked back towards me, brushed my hair behind my ear and then pulled me in for a kiss. That spark we had when we kissed, make me warm and happy inside, like his lips were a drug that I wanted to abuse, but I pulled away.
“Stop doing that!” I said. “I love Justin.”
He laughed, but then slowly came closer to my ear. “If you really loved him, you wouldn’t of let me kiss you.” Just like that, he was gone. Jumped down the fire escape and ran into the small woods that were right behind where I lived.
I then went back inside and locked the door to the balcony. I didn’t know what to do about him, but my one question is what is he doing here? Why did he come back? I laid in my bed, trying to answer some of my questions.
I laid on Justin’s chest, slowly drifted off to sleep.

If you can’t wait for the next chapter, check out my book on Wattpad. Just search katieasehl. You’ll find my finished and current works. At the moment, I am starting to work on an Unclear 2! 

Chapter 5:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/17/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-5/

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 2)

My Secret Love Book Cover

*Mature content, read at your own risk!*

Here is the second chapter of one of my other books! I hope you all enjoy! I will also be coming out with another post with all of these chapters and their links, soon! I found it that a lot of people really liked how helpful it was when they were looking for a chapter! I will try my best and see if I can have it pinned to the top of the page on it’s page.

Click here if you haven’t read Chapter 1:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/03/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-1/

~Chapter 2~

“When did you get this?” I asked. I carefully took a sip of coffee.
“A week ago. I hid it in my desk. I was going to tell you, but you seemed stressed out at the time.” My brother said. I just couldn’t believe that out of all files, he wouldn’t be the one to show up on my desk. “He’s wanted for murder, again.”
“Again? When did this happen?” I opened the file and saw that he was involved with the death of his parents. “But I thought that he was proven not guilty?”
“He was, but he disappeared after the trial. No one had hear from him in years, until now.” I got up from my desk and paced back and forth. “What’s wrong?”
I stopped and looked out the window, it was a beautiful fall morning. My brother walked over and looked at me as I kept staring at the window. “Nothing. I’m fine.”
Tim knew something was up, but left the subject alone as we went back to work. I looked over his file again. Rereading the same line, over and over again.
Wanted for the murder of  Alison Stonewall
The day went by pretty fast. Finished all the paper work for the day, but I didn’t get started on the file my brother gave me. I decided to lock it in my desk and pretend that it wasn’t there. Tim was texting on his phone, when our mother walked in.
“Elizabeth, may I have a word with you?” She looked over at my brother as he frowned. My father and her weren’t happy that Tim decided to come out to the closet.
“Whatever you have to say, just say it now. I’m getting ready to leave.” I said, making sure that I grabbed everything that I needed.
“I need you to stay late again. Your father and I need to talk to you.” I knew it.
“Well, what is it about? Justin is going to be here any minute now.” I said, ready to walk out the door, until my father stood in front of the door. “Hun, let her go. We can talk about it later.”
“We need to talk to her about that.” My mother wasn’t very happy. I had an idea of what they wanted to talk about because my brother then dropped his phone on his desk and then walked over to our father.
“Is it because I came out to you and told you that I’m gay? You think this is a illness? Something that I will just get over?” Tim paused and looked at our mother. “Just because you don’t believe in same-sex couples, doesn’t change who I am. Out of all people, I thought that you two would understand.”
Tim then grabbed my hand and we walked past them. “Wow.” I said once we reached the parking garage.
“I know, but I feel so much better.” We both hugged each other as Justin’s car pulled right next to Tim’s truck. “Looks like your stud muffin is here.”
Justin got out of the car, as he walked over to hug me, then kissed me on the lips. “Hey Tim, hows everything?” Justin asked as Tim smiled.
“Oh, peaches!” Tim then opened his car door and got right in. “You take care of my sister. Make sure she doesn’t drink too much.
“Don’t worry, I won’t go over board.” I said as he drove off.
Once we got into the car, Justin drove off to where we used to make-out all the time. I was confused, but as soon as he turned the car off, he grabbed two beers.
“So how was work?” He asked, but I didn’t answer him, until after I chugged my first beer. “That bad?”
“Well, let’s just say that I want to have a good time and just forget about it all, just for tonight.” I said, as he handed me my second beer.
“Don’t worry, babe.” He turned to me and grinned. “Forget about work, just relax.” He then started to kiss me. My hands started to wander up and down his body as were his hands were going up and down on my body.
I pulled away as he softly brushed his hand against my cheek. I then pulled him in for one last kiss. “Okay, you ready to go have some fun tonight?” I nodded yes as we then drove off to one of my favorite night clubs.
The club was packed as hell, but we found two seats by the bar. Justin got us our first round of shots. We both took 5 or 6 shots each and then headed onto the dance floor.
I grinded up and down on Justin, I could feel that he was starting to get hard, but then he stopped me from grinning and pulled me in for another kiss. Then we started kissing. Before we knew it, we were making out hard core, walking all the way down to the bathrooms.
I pulled away from his lips, while he started kissing my neck and his fingers traveled down my stomach. He tensed me by running his fingers slowly in between the beginning of my underwear line. Making it seem like his fingers were going to travel further.
A moan escaped from my mouth. Justin then kissed me and looked at me. “Ready to go home?” He asked. I nodded. “Meet me out by the car while I pay the tab.”
He kissed me one more time as I walked in front of him, swaying my hips back and fourth. He slapped my ass and whispered in my ear, “Stop being so naughty, or you’re gonna get it.” I giggled and then walked out of the club.
It’s very hard to walk straight when you see two of everything. I finally reached the car, but tripped right next to it. “Shit.” I mumbled.
“Hammered much?” A voice said, but chills ran up my spine. I recognized that voice, a voice I hadn’t heard in years. I got up and looked at him. “I-I-I’m fine.”
I couldn’t see his face, only his eyes. Bright blue eyes, that had gold in the middle. I remembered those eyes. It couldn’t of been him. He pushed my hair behind my ears.
“God, you are so beautiful.” He said as he leaned in and kissed me. I felt a spark, that same spark I hadn’t felt in a long time. He then pulled away, before I even opened my eyes, he was gone.
I touched my lips and tried to recall what had just happen, but Justin came back to the car and we went home. Even though I was drunk, I kept thinking about that kiss. I didn’t know if I should tell Justin.
Once we parked in the drive way, Justin ended up carrying me to our bedroom. He laid me down on the bed, taking off my shoes and his. “Who was that you were talking to?” He asked. I was so drunk and tired that I ended up passing out.
The next morning, I didn’t feel good. I ran to the bathroom, puked my brains out. I brushed my teeth and when I walked into the bedroom, Justin wasn’t in bed. I walked into the kitchen to see that he had made me coffee and breakfast. Still, I couldn’t find him.
I sat down and starting eating, when Justin walked into the kitchen, as he came from the front door. “Morning. How you feeling?” I gave him a dirty look.
“I feel like someone took a big ass hammer and is hitting me in the head, repeatedly.” I said, he smiled, but then he looked serious.
“So about last night.” He paused and sat down at the table next to me. “Who was that you were talking to?”
“I don’t know. I couldn’t really see his face.” I said.
“He?”
“I think, why?”
“Just curious.” He took a sip of his coffee. “I saw him get close to you. I didn’t know if it was a friend or not.”
“I don’t think I know him.” I lied. I know I’ve met him before, but I can’t remember where. I wasn’t paying attention to what I was saying, but it slipped out. “I think he kissed me, but I think I was just imaging it.”
“So, you knew him?” Justin questioned me again. Why was he being so worried? If I told him that I knew that guy, he would want to know who, but even I don’t know who.
“No, I don’t remember much after we had our hard core make-out session.”
“Okay, I was just making sure.” He paused and then touched my hand that was on the table. “I care about you too much and I don’t want to lose you. I love you, Elizabeth.”
“I love you, too.” I finished breakfast and then I decided that I wanted to get more sleep, so Justin and I cuddled the entire day. It was perfect, but my mind was still wondering who that mysterious guy was.

As always, if you can’t wait until the next chapter to come out, feel free to check it out on Wattpad, just search katieasehl, and you will find My Secret Love and few other books that I have been working on or currently finished.

Chapter 3:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/10/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-3/

 

Posted in My Secret Love

My Secret Love (Chapter 1)

my-secret-love-book-cover.png

Here is another one of my books! My Secret Love. I want to WARN everyone that there is mature content and this story might talk about abuse, rape, drugs. There is ALSO some very graphic sex scenes. I will let you all know at the beginning of each chapter!

When I woke up this morning, it didn’t feel like a normal day. It felt different. I looked over to see Justin still sleeping on the other side of the bed. I slowly got up, grabbed clothes and got into the shower.
I was glad today was Friday. With the work week I had, drinks are needed after I got out of work. I’ve been staying late almost every time for the past few months because of my little sister Sammy.
The water felt nice on my skin, I really didn’t want to get out, but it was already 7:43 a.m. I had to be at work for 8, but it looks like I’ll be a little late.
When I got out of the shower, Justin was already dressed and ready to go. I grabbed my clothes and dropped my towel. I had enough time to put my bra and underwear on before I felt his warm hands go down my arms.
“Let’s not go into work. Stay home with me, baby.” He slowly kissed my shoulder, going closer to my neck and lightly nibbled. “Please, baby? Take today off, I’m sure your parents will understand.”
I pulled away from him to put my jeans on and one of my favorite plaid button-up shirts. “I wish, but they don’t get it. I can’t have a life, but they can with Sammy.” I then grabbed my red leather jacket, that my Mimi gave me before she died. “I’ll try my best to get out early and then we can go to the bar, have a few drinks, and spend time together.” He kissed me and then smiled.
“We can do that. I really wish you had today off, but to make the day even better, how about I bring you to work?”He then grabbed his coat and his car keys. I grabbed my bag and then we left for work.
“You’re late, again.” I heard my mother’s voice as I was trying to eat my breakfast. She walked in and sat down in front of my desk. “Why were you late this time?”
I took a sip of my coffee and then looked at her. “Oh, I don’t know. Probably because my boyfriend wants to spend more time with me because for the last couple months, I have been working late.”
“I’m sorry, but you have more important things to do. Your father and I do like Justin, but you have duties here that you have to attend with.”
“I know.” I then took a bite out of my breakfast sandwich as she rolled her eyes, when she saw what I was wearing. “What’s the problem now?”
“You need to dress more formally if you’re going to be in the office all day. I raised you better than this, Elizabeth.” She then stood up as my older brother walked in. She looked at my brother and left our office.
“Well, what did you do to her now?” Tim asked as he closed the door. “Okay, now spill it.” He then sat down at his desk.
“She bitched at me for being late again. I told her that I would like to spend more time with my boyfriend, but that’s not important.” I ranted to him. “But, anyway, I see that she is still not talking to you.”
“Nope. Did I forget to mention that Dad stopped by my house last night?” Tim then put a file on his desk. “No way, why did he come over?” I asked.
“First of all, he was completely wasted, screaming and yelling in front of my house. I guess that’s what happen’s when I finally had the guts to tell them your gay.” He then got up and threw down a file.
My eyes widen when I saw the name of who the file was on. It was him. A name that I never thought I would see again. Michael James Locke.

As always, if you want to read the book, without waiting for the chapters, it is out on Wattpad, and search katieasehl. 

Chapter 2:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/08/06/my-writing-my-secret-love-chapter-2/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – 10 Years Later, Happy Ending (Chapter 20) ~End~

Unclear Book Cover

Hey dearies! I didn’t know how short this ending was, I’m sorry about that! So, for an extra special, I am going to give you guys a NEW chapter from one of my other books!

If you haven’t read Chapter 19, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/30/my-writing-unclear-all-just-a-dream-chapter-19/

Jade’s P.O.V. 
I never thought that I would be a mother. Even when I dreamed about it, I never thought I would be able to have any kids after the accident. I moved into Tanner’s place after the accident. He has helped me so much. We fell in love all over again and got married 3 years later.
And now, we are parents to twins. Just like in the dream.
But, come to find out…
My best friend is dead. He died 3 weeks after the twins were born. I do miss him. I’ll think about here and then, but he doesn’t spend too much time on my mind.
Tanner’s sister is married and is expecting a little boy.
My mom and her new husband ended up splitting up after she lost the babies.
And me? Well, I’ve been a stay at home mother and also been teaching students online for a living. But after everything I’ve been through, I’m finally happy. I just wished my sister and father were here.
I’m glad that I have a family of my own. It’s perfect for my happy ending.

So, I’m debating on creating a sequel because I didn’t realize how I ended it, so I will keep you guys posted on my Facebook and Twitter. Hope you all enjoyed this story! If you have any feedback, please feel free to let me know! 

Posted in Podcast

Let’s Rant – Episode 2 (13 Reason Why)

Hello Dearies! So, for this podcast, I wanted to talk about a TV Series that has everyone talking about, 13 Reasons Why. Netflix released the second season earlier this year, yes I know I am a behind on talking about it.

Anyway, if you haven’t seen it on Netflix, I recommend you NOT to listen in. I will also be talking about the book as well, and yes, this series was based off a book!

Image result for 13 reasons why book cover

So, a spoiler alert is needed.

Image result for 13 reasons why

Click here if you want to listen in to the tapes that the author created for the book:
https://www.youtube.com/user/Hannahsfriend13/featured

If you are struggling with life or need someone to talk to, here is the Lifeline website. There is always another option!!! It’s better to talk about it than be silent!
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

Here is the website, from the TV series:
https://13reasonswhy.info/

Here is the website from the actually book, with more information:
http://www.thirteenreasonswhy.com/

Check out my YouTube channel, it has all my podcasts and much more!
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzooJ6mOChq1CCHgAiPGC8g

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Why I Decided To Fix An Old Friendship

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So, if you have been reading or following my blog since April of this year, I talked about how I had to get rid of one of my best friends because it was too much unwanted drama and stress. I didn’t fix that relationship, believe me, it’s not worth fixing, to me.

I’m talking about another relationship that I destroyed back in my senior year of high school. I can’t really remember why I got rid of her as a friend. I believe it was because I thought she was more drama, but I don’t have a set reason on why I did what I did.

I’ve known her since the 10th grade, but we really connected and became best friends in 11th grade. We had many fights, but always fixed them as soon as possible. When senior year was coming to an end, I ended the friendship. Maybe because I didn’t think I would see her as much? Maybe I wanted to end the pain of losing her as a friend?

The only thing I can think of is that I was very immature and everyone in high school can be immature. What really made me look back and realized all the stupid shit I did and all the people I pushed out of my life, was when I lost my son.

When you go through something as difficult and it changes you. You think of things differently, you rethink all your actions, and you become more mature after going through something as difficult as death or anything.

After my son died, I deleted my old Facebook and created a new one a few months after, I wanted time away from social media. Well, in the past couple weeks, I saw her profile pop up on my suggestions list for friends. I debated on whether on messaging her or not, just because on how I ended things so quickly and without reason.

I’ll be honest, when I finally got the courage to message her, I literally had it all wrote out on my phone, planning on what I was gonna say to her. Deep down, I knew that I should at least be an adult and say sorry for all the crap I caused. All I thought she would do is have my ass handed to me, which I totally deserved, but I was shocked.

I think she was shocked too when I sent that message, but I’m glad I did. She forgave me, something I didn’t think that would happen, but she did. It shows how much we have both grown up in the past almost 3 years.

We ended up telling each other everything we have done within the past 3 years. We even talked about our high school days. I was shocked to find out that she had been thinking about me too, wondering why I got rid of her as a friend.

If I looked back at the only really close friendships I had, the one I had with her, was probably the best because we clicked a lot better that I did with my other ex best friend. The ex best friend, we had a few things in common, but I feel I was more issues and drama because she wanted to be center of attention.

I’m glad I took the shot to fix a broken friendship that I ruined. It felt good to know that after 3 years, we clicked back, just like that. Even now, that I have kids, she still would’ve stayed if I just kept her in my life, but the past is in the past. I’m going to try my best to, hopefully, keep this friendship for many more years and years to come.

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – Prayers, Anything Please (Chapter 18)

Unclear Book Cover

After this chapter, only to more chapters will be left! If you like to vote on if I should make an Unclear or show one of my other works, check out my Facebook page to vote! There is only a few days left!

If you haven’t read Chapter 17, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/23/my-writing-unclear-new-life-chapter-17/

Tanner’s P.O.V.
~4 Weeks Later~
This wasn’t suppose to happen. She should’ve made it out okay. Now, the mother of my children, may not even walk out of here alright. We need a fucking miracle, something. She can’t leave this world, not now. Her babies need her.
Jade hasn’t improved since she gave birth to our twins. The babies were able to come home the 4th day since they were born. They only got to see her once. I’ve been visiting the hospital as much as I can, but it’s been difficult with the twins home. Jade’s mom has been a huge help with all of this. She told me that she would help me out until Jade is well and able to come home.
They don’t know what caused it. Its like she’s sleeping beauty, but someone did something to her. She looks like she’s in a deep sleep that she can’t wake herself up. Doctor’s think that she just lost a lot of blood and pasted out because she just gave birth, but I don’t believe it. I think that someone did something to here.
As I looked over at Jade, hoping that she just opens her eyes at me, touch my hand back, or move, something. I grabbed her hand and held it in mine and just watched her as the doctor came in.
“How is she doing?” I asked as I looked up at Dr. Locke. He frowned. “Okay, the same she was or has been for the past couple weeks.”
“Do you know when she will wake up?” Rubbing her soft hands.
“Unfortunately, we are still unsure about it, but the good thing is that she’s stable.” He paused, “However, we did get a phone call from a Mr. John, he said that he wants you to call him back. I guess he didn’t know you or Jade’s number.” As he handed me a piece of paper that had a number written on it. “I’ll be bad in a few hours to check up on her again. Have a good day.”
As soon as Dr. Locke left, I dialed the number in my cell phone and placed it to my ear. It rang a few times before I heard the familiar voice that I didn’t think I would ever see or hear from again.
“So, sorry to hear about how my beloved Jade isn’t doing well. What a shame.” Lucas spoke. My blood started to boil, just hearing his name pissed me off.
“How the hell do you know all this? I thought that we were done with all this high school bullshit.”
“I have ears, James. I’m not that stupid, but I’m not into Jade anymore. Since I have came to the conclusion that she will never be with me, I have decided that if she can’t be mine, she can’t be with anyone.”
“What did you do to her?? Her children need her now, they need their mother!” I yelled.
“I know a doctor who’s drugging her up and keeping her from waking up. I told you not to call this cops, but you did and sent me to jail, yet again. And of course I know her children need her, that’s why she will be woken up, but soon. So don’t get your hopes up, she could be gone before your eyes.” He laughed.
“You just aren’t going to leave her alone, aren’t you? You can’t let her have the life she wants, unless it’s with you? She’ll never love you the way she loves me now. What you did to her, she’ll never forget. So what are going to do now, huh? Drug her and have the family that you wanted? I don’t think so, whatever you thought about doing to her, forget it. You won’t get past me to get Jade or our children. Go ahead and try, I dare you, because as soon as you do get anywhere near her, I’ll make sure that some one is there to arrest your ass and make sure that you never get out.”
“We will see about that, just because she has that restraining order on me, don’t mean shit to me. I’m not the one who’s going to get her or your children and besides, I’ll make a better father to them than you ever were.”
“Like hell you are! You keep dreaming about that buddy, cause it won’t ever happened. Why don’t you go bother someone else for a change.” I hung up.
I just sat there and just kept thinking. How will I be able to protect both Jade and the babies? Just in case this dumb ass actually comes out and tries to get them.
Why the hell does this stuff have to happen to us?

Next chapter will be out on Friday!

Chapter 19:

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – New Life (Chapter 17)

Unclear Book Cover

Good Morning! Here is another chapter of my book! Only a few more chapters left! I also wanted to let everyone know, if you haven’t noticed, I have updated each chapter, so before you read the current chapter you are on, I will have a link for the chapter before and at the end, I will have a link to the next chapter, from the one you are currently on. 

If some of the link aren’t working, let me know, so I can fix them! I also have a list of all the chapter. I will be updating that as well, until the end of the book!

If you haven’t read Chapter 16, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/20/my-writing-unclear-its-time-chapter-16/

Enjoy!

~New Life~

Jade’s P.O.V.
“Just a few more pushes.” Doctor Locke said as I pushed. “One more.” Then I heard crying. Tanner looked at me and kissed me. “It’s a boy!”
“How is he? He’s healthy right?” I asked. Worried that something might be wrong.
“He’s perfectly fine, but we need to get the next one out now.” He said as he handed my son to one of the nurses. “Okay, push.” I pushed and pushed.
“Okay, I see it’s head, now one more push.” I pushed and then hear the crying of my second child. “It’s a girl!” I smiled in relief. I felt exhausted. Tanner kissed me once more.
“They are beautiful.” Tanner said. I smiled. I then started to fade. “Jade?” I heard Tanner say before I completely blacked out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tanner’s P.O.V. 
“Jade!” I said.
“Her heart rate is slowing down. You need to leave.” The doctor said as I was being pulled out of the room. They closed the door and I threw my hands in my hair. Why the hell is this happening? James came up to me.
“It everything okay?” He asked.
“The babies are fine, but they kicked me out because Jade’s heart rate started to going down.” I just wish that they would tell me what the hell is wrong. I can’t lose another person who I love. I just can’t. It would kill me.
“Don’t worry, she’s a fighter, she’ll be fine.” He said, then walked back to the waiting room. I started to pace back and forth for about 20 minutes, until one of the nurses came out from the room.
“How is she? What happened to her in there?” I asked. I couldn’t wait any longer, I needed answers.
“She lost a lot of blood. Currently, she is fine, but she is in a comma. We aren’t sure how it happened, all we know is that it might be a while, before she wakes up.” My eyes started to water. How the hell did this happen? Then the nurse spoke again. “You can go in and see her, if you like, but why don’t you meet your son and daughter.”
I followed the nurse to the nursery. She then picked up my son and handed me him. Just holding him in my arms was priceless. It really was. A tear slipped from my eye, as I held his little hands. He was just so tiny. Perfect.
The nurse then switched with me, so that I could hold my daughter. She looked so much like Jade. It sadden me that Jade wasn’t able to hold our children before she went into a comma. I just hoped that she will wake up in time for us to all go home as a family.
“Did you have any names in mind?” The nursed asked as I looked up at her and then back down to my daughter.
“Yeah, we had names picked out.” I paused, “I just didn’t think it would just be me to name them.”
“I understand, but they do need names.”
“I know.” I said, looking down at my daughter. She was just as beautiful as her mother. I then started to think back to when we were talking about baby names.
A few months ago…
“What about Matthew?” Jade said, we were siting on our couch, both looking for baby names. She was looking through a baby book that had a list of names, while I was looking on my phone.
“I like it, but what about Norman?” I said. Jade looked at me and questioned me.
“Norman? That sounds like a old person’s name.” I looked over at her. “So? Everyone names their kid Matthew, it’s a very common name.” I explained, she looked back at her book.
“What about Logan? Logan Michael? I can see that. What do you think?” She asked.
“Sounds good to me. I think I can live with our son being named that.” She smiled. “And for a girl, we should name her Athena Lynn.”
“That’s beautiful. How did you come up with that?”
“It was my great-grandmother’s name.” I said, looking at her. She smiled. “So are we done with name picking because I think that we are done, finally.” She rolled her eyes.
“Yes, we are done.” She paused and placed my hand on her stomach. “They are kicking.” I smiled when I felt them kicking.
“They must like their names.” I smiled and took my other hand and placed it on her cheek. “That and they must love their mommy.”
“And their daddy.” Jade added as I came in and kissed her.
I smiled. As I looked down at my daughter. “Her name is Athena Lynn.”
The nurse then handed me my son and I held both children in my arms. “His name is Logan Michael.” I then placed a kiss on both of them. The nurse took my daughter and placed her down. I then placed my son down.
Now that I saw my children and held them for the first time, I wanted to see Jade.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jame’s P.O.V.
As I walked back to the waiting room, Jade’s mother and Savannah were waiting. Savannah shot up and walked over to me.
“How is she? Is she okay? How are the babies?” She questioned me. I looked at her and my face sadden. She’s gonna be just as hurt as I was when Tanner told me.
“The babies are healthy, but Jade’s heart rate started to go down and the doctors kicked Tanner out. They haven’t said what was wrong with her, yet.” I said. Savannah started to cry. Jade’s mother walked over and her eyes started to water.
“I feel so bad.” Jade’s mother said. “I could’ve fixed the relationship we had, but instead, I give all my attention to my husband.” Savannah hugged her.
“It’s not your fault. People do crazy things, when their in love.” Savannah said. She had a point. I ruined a chance to be with Jade and because of that, she’s with Tanner. They’ll make one great family. “But we aren’t here about that. We are here to support Jade and Tanner. Come on, let’s go get some coffee, while we wait for more news from Tanner.”
I ended up siting in one of the waiting room chairs. I can’t believe that this is happening. Jade doesn’t deserve this. She doesn’t deserve me as a friend. Why the hell did I come?
My phone then started to go off. It was my girlfriend calling me.
“Hello?”
“Where the hell have you been?” she yelled.
“I’ve been at the hospital. Jade just had her babies.”
“What! Do you even know what day it is today?”
“Um, our anniversary? Your birthday?”
“No and no! We had plans to go out to the club tonight!”
“Well, I’m really not up for clubbing.”
“Why not?? You promised!”
“Ugh, fine. Just let me find out what the hell happened to Jade and then I’ll be on my way to pick you up.”
“Well, hurry the fuck up! Or you don’t get your surprise.”
“Okay, okay. I’m on my way now. See you in a few.” I then hung up on her. Fuck. I got up and started to walk out the door, until Savannah stopped me. She was just by herself.
“Where are you going?” She asked. I really didn’t have time for this. I just realized that ‘surprise’ my girlfriend had for me, it’s a threesome and I’m not going to pass it up.
“I’ve got to go. Keep me updated.” I said, as I ran out of the hospital.

Next chapter will be out on Friday! If you can’t wait to finish the book, you can always go to Wattpad and search katieasehl, not only will you find Unclear, but you will also find other books that I have wrote or I’m currently working on. 

Chapter 18:
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/27/my-writing-unclear-prayers-anything-please-chapter-18/

Posted in Gaming

The Sims Saga: Which Do I Prefer?

Image result for the sims

When you here the game Sims, what comes to mind? I think about The Sims games, creating a character and controlling their life. A lot of people forget that the Sims first originated from SimCity, where you created a city and made sure that it was successful.

I’m not going to talk about SimCity, though. This is mainly about The Sims. I’ll be honest, I’ve never actually played the Sims, but for it’s time, it was amazing. To be able to control their life, made them do whatever our hearts wanted them to do.

It was like GTA, but without the violence and free will to move your Sim manual. You could even create your dream house, have a family, or get the job of your dreams. When I got hooked, it wasn’t with the first The Sims, it was The Sims 2.

The Sims 2

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The first time I saw The Sims 2, was when I was on YouTube. I had came across it and it was recommend to me. A lot of people actually used The Sims 2 game, to create movies or series, or what got me hooked on, was the teen pregnancy series.

You must think that I’m weird to like to watch them, but seriously, look up the series ‘My Life’. The creator of that series, she really got me to thinking that I wanted to do something creative like that. If you actually watch her series, from her very first episode, to her newer ones, she has come a long way.

The Sims 2 had more to offer, as well. There were more add-on’s to the game, such as the different seasons, hobbies, and even jobs. It made the game play more like real life.

I finally had a chance to buy it for myself, and I am currently, trying to learn how to film and make a good series, that I will post on my YouTube channel.

Even if you aren’t trying to make a series, its a great way to past the time on a rainy day. Hell, I even when forward and created my fiance, son, daughter, and myself into the game. I highly recommend getting this game! It’s the best of both worlds.

Now, let’s talk about its, aftermath…The Sims 3.

The Sims 3

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I’m going to try my best not to bash this game. It wasn’t a bad sequel to The Sims 3. They added a lot of new things, such as making it easier to custom clothes and items, you didn’t have to wait for loading times to get from one place to another, and you could follow your Sim to work, the hospital, etc.

There was one BIG issue with this game. It is SO buggy. If you didn’t have the best computer in the world, you were bugging because your game would lag. Brand new or with mods, it would lag, or the loading time would take forever. Especially if you are in create-a-sim.

To me, the creators wanted to get this game out, as soon as possible because of the high demand that The Sims 2 was, so they did rush it, a little, by adding some stuff that the other games never had.

The one thing that I LOVED about it, was that you could follow your Sim anywhere without having to deal with those loading screens and the way you could custom, almost everything.

The Sims 3 was the first Sims game that I have ever own and I had the season, pets, and supernatural packs that made the game play so much fun! I wonder, now that I have a better computer, if it would run better?

Last, but not least, let’s get to the newer Sims game that came out in the last few years, The Sims 4.

The Sims 4

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Again, this is another game I haven’t touched, yet, and I have looked into seeing if it is really worth getting, but to me, the creators went back a couple steps. You think with a newer game, it would be better and would fix the problems from the last game, well, they did, but not very well.

I have heard that the game play is okay, graphics are okay, etc. It is missing A LOT from The Sims 3 game. You have loading screens for EVERYWHERE you go, even if you are going to the next door neighbor.

It’s not as buggy or laggy, as The Sims 3 was, but they had to get rid of a lot of stuff, in order to fix it, which a lot of people were disappointed in. The Sims 4, seems to me, boring. Just because they didn’t add anything new that would make us get excited.

Although, they did add a pack that basically makes you do your Sims job. Which was something that we could do in the other games, but I would rather just fast-forward my Sim’s job, then doing it, I’m already controlling pretty much them, why should I have to do their work for them?

Which is worth playing?

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The Sims 2, hands down. I would recommend it to everyone. It plays great on Windows 10, there is a few glitches, but it’s still playable. I like how the Sims are in this game and how you can do so much.

Plus, it still has that SimCity feeling to it, so that I could make my own town, I could. I am hoping to get a few more packs, just to play around with it some more. I do have the the Late Night and University packs, so I am hoping to either get Pets or Seasons next.

If you are a Sims fan, which game do you prefer? Leave a comment down below! There has also been a rumor that they are working on The Sims 5, do you thinks they should have another Sims? If so, what do you think they need to improve or leave alone?

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – The Last Long Love (Chapter 15)

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Good morning! What a great way to start your day with a little Unclear! Sadly, only 5 more chapters left! If you are one of my readers that has been reading this on every Monday and Friday, I need your help! Should I make a sequel or just show another story? 

If you haven’t read Chapter 14, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/13/my-writing-unclear-maries-hope-chapter-14/

~The Last Long Love~

Marie P.O.V.
“Y-You’re here?!?” I coughed again, this time there was blood coming out. I was dying and it was starting now.
“I finally found you. After two years of searching, I found you.” Eli said, coming closer to my side of the bed. Sitting down next to me, taking his hand and feeling my cheek. His hands were cold, but that’s because he’s dead. A vampire.
“I thought you were a goner when you were trapped in that house fire.” Tears started to my eyes, remember that night was torture. Deep down, I did love Eli, but he didn’t find out that I was dying until that very night when I told him. Sadly, vampires can’t have children with the living, they must be a vampire in order to have any young.
“No, I escaped in time, but was very weak. It took me a long time to heal myself, after that, I went off in searching for you.” He said, wiping my tears away. God, was he was just as beautiful as the day I first met him. “I love you, Marie. When I got here, I was told that you were in the hospital, dying, but I can help you.”
“Please help her. She’s my only family after our parents left.” My brother spoke out, but he was right, ever since our parents left, he was the only family that I had left. But he wouldn’t be alone, he has two unborn children on the way and I know for a fact that he will be a amazing father. “What can you do to help her?”
“Well, I can try two things,” Eli paused and looked up at Tanner and Jade. “One, is I give her my blood and see if she heals.”
“Okay, what is the second thing?” Jade asked.
“I’d give her my blood and if it didn’t heal her, she would become a vampire, like myself.” Eli said those last words, I didn’t think he would let me become a vampire. He wanted me to enjoy my human life, since he was unable to enjoy his.
“Wait, if she turns into one of you, she won’t be able to stand in sunlight? Or can’t be around holy water? And have to survive on just blood?” Tanner sounded worried.
“My friend, she will be fine. I’ll teach her everything she knows. I also have a ring that allows her to walk in the sunlight.” Eli said as I coughed again, harder and more blood started to come out. Eli grabbed a towel and handed it to me. “She’s getting worse. A few more coughs like that and she might be dead.”
“But what if I become a horrible beast that might feed on my niece and nephew? And don’t ever stop.” I asked. That was the only thing that I was worried about. I didn’t want to become a monster that hurts everyone in my path. I can’t do that.
Eli pushed my hair out of my face and I looked into his eyes. “I won’t let you get like that, my love. I’ll make sure of it.” He kissed my cheek and looked up at Tanner. “It’s her choice if she wants to change. I won’t force her to do anything, but just remember that she won’t be the same after this transformation. Because of this, once she is changed, I’m going to take her far away from here and help her get over her craving for blood, so that when your children are born, neither you or your family will be put to harm.”
Tanner walked over to me and kissed my forehead. “It’s your choice, but I would want you to be there for my unborn children. If you think you can do it, I’ll support you.”
“I want to change.” I coughed harder again. Eli then bit his wrist and fed me his blood. Once I started, I couldn’t stop. Then Eli pulled away.
“You must let me take her away from here now, otherwise you’ll have to watch her go in pain and die.” Eli said as Tanner nodded ‘yes’. He picked me up and we were gone, just like that.
“It hurts!” I yelled. My heart felt like it just exploded. I couldn’t breathe or move. I just laid there in pain. “Just kill me!”
“Love, it is. I can kill you, but I don’t want to hurt you like that. It’s almost over.” Eli said. Then my vision became blurry. Everything stopped. I didn’t feel alive anymore. I felt dead.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eli’s P.O.V.
Her transformation was complete. It was only a matter of days of when she would awaken as a vampire. I grabbed her phone and dialed the number that was her brothers.
“Marie! Are you alright?” He answered
“It’s me, Eli. And she has just finished her transformation.”
“Okay, but when can I see her again?”
“Well, once she wakes up, I’ll teach her to survive on blood bags. Then I’ll have to teach her to refrain from killing any humans. It really depends on how strong she can maintain it.”
“And how long will that take?” He asked. I knew this question couldn’t be answered right on. It all depends on Marie and how she changes.
“I can’t say for sure, but I will make sure that she contacts you when she is awake. It could be months or even years. It all depends on her. I’ll keep you updated.”
“Please take care of her, she is the only one I have left.” Then he hung up. I then placed her phone down and walked over to the window.
I can’t believe that I changed her. I wanted her to live a wonderful human life, but after that curse that was placed on her, she might not wake up for weeks. I love her, but I never wanted her to have this life. The only thing I can do now is help her, so that she doesn’t do the same mistake that I did years ago.
That might take a very long time. I just hope that she won’t change to become a completely different person. Just like my brother did.

Next chapter will be out on Friday! If can’t wait and want to keep reading, my book, Unclear, is on Wattpad! Just search katieasehl, and you will not only find Unclear, but other works that I written or are currently working on. 

Chapter 16: It’s Time
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/20/my-writing-unclear-its-time-chapter-16/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – Marie’s Hope (Chapter 14)

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Happy Friday! Here is another chapter to start your day off on a good note! Enjoy!

If you haven’t read Chapter 13, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/09/my-writing-unclear-whats-going-on-chapter-13/

~Marie’s Hope~

Marie’s P.O.V.
I woke up in the hospital. I guess I fainted, but I knew what was happening. I was dying. Nothing could save me now. Nothing could. I looked over to see my brother and Jade by the side of the bed. Tanner was holding my hand.
“How you feeling?” Jade asked as my brother looked up and saw that I was awake. How long had I been out for?
“I feel…Weak.” I said. I did. Every bone in my body felt cold, like I was starting to die. I can’t die. Not now.
“As long as you are alive, that’s all that matters.” Tanner said and kissed the top of my forehead. “Do you want something to eat? I’m gonna go down to the cafe and get some coffee.”
“If they have sour cream and onion chips, that would be great.” I said. Tanner looked over to Jade and she replied, “Water and maybe just some fruit.” As he left the room, Jade sat down in the chair that Tanner was sitting in.
“You are going to be a wonderful mother. I can already see it.” I said, then coughed. “You’re good for my brother. I haven’t seen him this happy in a long time.”
“Thank you, and you will be a wonderful godmother.” Once Jade spoke those words, my eyes watered. She is letting me be a godmother? The only thing that’s wrong with that is that I won’t be there for my niece and nephew. As soon as she saw me crying, she spoke again. “Please don’t cry, I wasn’t trying to make you cry, I just wanted you to know. I haven’t told Tanner yet.”
“I’m crying because I won’t even make it threw the night. Tonight is my last night on this Earth. Nothing can save me. Unless, no, that won’t work.” I coughed again, this time I felt that I was coughing up a lung.
“What? Tell me, anything that might be able to save your life. I’ll do anything.” Jade asked. The only way that I could escape death would be to drink a vampire’s blood, but their are none in the area. I’ve checked.

“It won’t work, Jade. There are no vampire’s in town.” I said as Tanner came in.
“What about them?” Tanner asked, giving Jade her water and fruit and me my sour cream and onion chips. “They aren’t real.”
“So you think.” I said. “They are real, one of my good friend’s is one, but he lives very far away.” As I said that a strange guy walked into the room. I knew exactly who he was. Eli Litton.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Such a cliffhanger! Next chapter will be out on Monday! If you can’t wait until then, you can always go to Wattpad and search katieasehl, you will find Unclear and other works that I have worked on or what I am currently working on. Unclear is slowly coming to an end and I want to know if I should make a sequel or just post one of my other works. 

Chapter 15: The Last Long Love
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/16/my-writing-unclear-the-last-long-love-chapter-15/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – What’s Going On? (Chapter 13)

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New chapter to the start of a new week! Now’s it’s going to start to get a little better, we are going to find out of Marie’s hidden past. Anyway, here is the next chapter of Unclear! Enjoy!

If you haven’t read Chapter 12, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/06/my-writing-unclear-hes-coming-for-me-chapter-12/

~What’s Going On?~

Jade’s P.O.V.
Tanner has been pacing back and forth for over an hour. I tried to ask him what was wrong, but he just kept telling me that he’s fine, but I know he’s not fine. I wish there was something to do to make him feel better.
“Tanner?” I asked. He looked up at me and smiled. “Are you sure that everything is okay?” He came over and sat next to me, hugging me. Why wouldn’t he just talk to me?
“I don’t want you to stress over it. I want you to focus on taking care of our babies.” He answered. I have been taking care of the babies, but I want to know what’s troubling him.
“Please, just tell me. I hate seeing you like this.” I said. He took a deep breath and then looked at me.
“Marie was the one to bail Lucas out of jail. She thought that having him back, he would take you away from James, but once I told her that you were pregnant with my baby, she locked him up to keep you safe.” He then paused. “He escaped this morning and he is threatening to kill my sister, if I don’t hand you over to him, but my sister is already going to die.”
“Why is she going to die?” I was just too shocked to say anything else.
“In my family, my grandmother was a witch. My parents didn’t want anything to do with magic because it killed my grandfather. When my sister got burned in the face, my grandmother did a spell and in order for her to live, she must have a baby before her 21st birthday.” He explained. “That’s why she went after James, but since he loved you, it wouldn’t work. She has to have a baby with someone who loves her.”
“Oh, that explains everything. I thought she was just doing that because she didn’t like me.” I felt so bad. I had no problem with her, but I just wish that she had open up to me about this. “Wait, did she tell Lucas that I’m pregnant with your babies?”
“Yeah, but he doesn’t seem to care. He said that he was going to raise them as his own on his old family farm.” He then threw his hands in his hair. “I’m just trying to find a way to save my sister, without getting you involved.”
“He just wants me, but I have a restraining order on him. He doesn’t want money?” When I mentioned that I had a restraining order on him, his eyes lit up.
“Does he know? About the restraining order?” Tanner asked and I nodded my head no. He smiled. He might of just thought of something. Before I could say anything he spoke again. “This is perfect. He can meet up at our place, but I’ll make a phone call to one of my friends, who is a cop, and once he steps on our property, he’ll be arrested again.”
Tanner then got up and made some phone calls. I then got up and walked over to my desk to find the papers. Once I found them, it flashed back to some old frighten memories of what he did to me and my sister. I just hope that they do throw him back in jail, I want my kids to be able to grow up safe and sound.
He came back in the room and I handed him the papers. “So when is this all going to go down?” I asked. Tanner kissed me on the forehead and smiled.
“He’s on his way.” I froze. I haven’t seen Lucas in years. I’m not sure what he might do. As long as his ass gets thrown in jail and far away from my new family. I hope Marie is okay, as well. I made a lot of sense to why she didn’t like me, but since things have changed, I would like her to at least hold one of her nephew or niece.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Marie’s P.O.V.
I couldn’t see anything. All I know is that I could be in the trunk of a car. I tried to free myself, but I couldn’t free my hands, from what felt like rope. My head was killing me. The last thing I remember is hearing Lucas on the phone with my brother and that’s when I blacked out.
A car door slammed shut and someone opened the trunk. I could feel the fresh breeze hitting my face. A pair of hands grabbed me and pulled me out of the trunk.
“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” Sounded like Lucas’ voice. “I’m going to hand you over to your brother, while your brother hands over my girl. Got it?”
I nodded. I felt so wrong for betraying my brother and Jade. I should’ve never bailed him out in the first place. I should’ve just found a different man to fall in love with, but my time is soon coming to the end.
Then the blind fold was taken off my head. I could see Tanner and Jade right in front of me. Lucas was still holding my arms. Jade looked scared as she saw Lucas.
“Damn, you just got even more beautiful then you were littler. ” Lucas said. “Can’t wait for us to start a life together. Especially, with the two little ones on the way.”
“They aren’t even yours.” Jade said, holding my brother’s hand.
“I don’t care who’s they are, they will be our children.” Lucas grinned. I wanted to just punch him in the face. “Don’t worry, Tanner. They will be in good hands.”
Tanner grinned back at Lucas. “We will see about that, now won’t we?” Tanner said as a two cops grabbed Lucas and handcuffed him.
“What the fuck? You can’t arrest me for doing nothing!” Lucas yelled as they placed him in the back of the cop car.
“Actually, you are breaking a restraining over that Ms. Roy has against you.” One of the officers said. “Since that violates your patrol, you are most likely going back to jail.”
“This isn’t fair! I’ll get you for this! And your family too!” Lucas yelled as he was taken away.
Tanner and Jade came up to me and untied me. Jade hugged me, which surprised me, but made me feel a lot better that my nephew and niece are safe now. Now since that creep was going to be locked up, I think that all three of us felt a lot better.
My head started to spin, I was losing my balance. Pain in my chest was literally killing me. It was too late. I didn’t want to leave this world, but I didn’t find true love in time. I fell to the ground, Tanner screaming my name. That’s when everything went completely black.

Next chapter will be out on Friday! As always, if you can’t wait until Friday to read Unclear, the book is currently on Wattpad, just search my username katieasehl and you will find Unclear and a few other books that I have out on there. If you have checked out my other works, what should I do next after Unclear is finished? Should I make a sequel and make it all about one character, or do what I did in Unclear and focus it on everyone?

Chapter 14: Marie’s Hope
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/13/my-writing-unclear-maries-hope-chapter-14/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – He’s Coming For Me (Chapter 12)

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Happy Friday! Bring another chapter to you. Again, I’m really sorry that these chapter’s haven’t been the greatest, but still hold on! It’s going to start getting a little better pretty soon! Enjoy!

If you haven’t read Chapter 11, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/02/my-writing-unclear-its-a-what-chapter-11/

~He’s Coming For Me~

Marie’s P.O.V. 
I was dreading about today. I had to left Lucas out, but I had a bad feeling about it. I was thinking about not letting him out all morning long, but I finally got the guts to go up stairs and break him free, but when I got up there, he was nowhere to be found in his cage. I panicked. Where could he be?
I opened the caged and walked in. “Let’s go Lucas, I don’t have time for your games this morning.” I said as I turned around, Lucas was right in front of me.
“Hello.” He said as I pulled my hand out, he put something around my wrist. I tried to choke him, but my powers weren’t working.
“What did you do to my powers?” I said, trying to remove it off my wrist. He then shut the cage door and locked me in it. “What the hell?? Let me out! I was going to do it this morning, like I promised you!”
“I got impatience.” He said. “You really didn’t think that I would sit on my ass any longer than I had to? I told you that when you freed me out, I wanted my girl back, but since you treated me like shit and got on my bad side, I thought I return the favor.”
“Seriously? How did you get this?” I said pointing to the bracelet around my wrist.
“Well, it didn’t take long to find it.” He grinned. “You really think I didn’t know about witches? Please! My mother raised me to become a wizard, but I never had any magic myself. You were the lucky one. It skipped me.”
“What do you want?” I asked. I just wanted to get the hell out of this cage and kill him.
“Well, for one, I want her. And you’re going to tell me where she is, but if not,” He paused, took his knife out and started to sharpen it. “I’ll kill your brother, right in front of you. Then I’ll leave you in there, where you will die.”
“Why don’t you let me out of here and I’ll show you to her instead.”
“How about no. You are going to stay put here. While I visit my love.”
“What do you see in her anyway? I thought you loved her sister?”
“I did, but she didn’t love me. She cheated on me and I threaten her if she ever did leave me or cheat on me, I’d kill her and rape her sister.” He said.
“It doesn’t matter, she doesn’t love you. And those aren’t your babies. Those are Tanner’s and they will always be!” I yelled.
“I don’t care! She is mine now!” He said as he was about to walk down the steps, but stopped. “Oh, I did think about having a child with you, but since you tried to kill me, I’ve changed my mind.” He then left.
I reached in my pocket and got my phone. The least I can do is warn them.
“Hello?” Tanner answered.
“Listen, I’ve made a huge mistake.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tanner’s P.O.V.
“You did what!!??” I yelled.
“I’m sorry, I thought that he would take Jade away from James, but once she became pregnant, I locked him up and he just escaped.” Marie said, she seemed really sorry, but of course, she did it for her own personal reasons. Now the mother of my children is in danger.
“Fuck, Marie. Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m alright, but don’t worry about me, protect Jade and the babies. He’s going after them. He plans on taking them to his old home and planning on raising them as his own.” She said.
“I will, don’t worry.”
“Just protect her-,” Her side went silent.
“Marie!? IS everything okay?” I asked, I hope she was okay.
“Oh, don’t worry, she’ll be fine.” A male voice spoke.
“What did you do to her!?” I yelled.
“Nothing… Yet.” He  paused and just as I was about to speak, he spoke instead. “Listen and listen good, Tanner. In order for your sister to live, I want Jade. Otherwise, I’m going to kill her by 10 pm tonight.” I then heard Marie yell, ‘Don’t worry about me, save yourselves.’
“I know what you did, Lucas. You are never going to get Jade. Never. Let my sister go, now!” I said, I knew it was Lucas, I put it together.
“How about no. And besides, your sister is gonna die anyway because of your grandmother.”
“What are you talking about? Our grandmother passed away a long time ago.” I was so confused.
“Oh, she never told you? Well, since your grandmother did some magic on her, she has been cursed, until she has a child before this coming up full moon. So me killing her now, is doing her a favor. I’ll see you at 10.”

Next chapter will be out on Monday! It you are too impatient and really want to keep reading, Unclear is on Wattpad, just search my username katieasehl. You will also find my other works, as well. Unclear is going to be ending soon, so if you would like me to create a sequel for it, send me a message or comment down below!

Chapter 13: What’s Going On?
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/09/my-writing-unclear-whats-going-on-chapter-13/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – It’s a…. WHAT?? (Chapter 11)

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Good Morning! We are finally in the month of July! I feel like this year has gone by so fast, so far. Anyway, here is another chapter of my book. In this chapter, we find out the sex of the baby! Enjoy and prepared to be shocked!

If you haven’t read Chapter 10, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/29/my-writing-unclear-5-months-chapter-10/

~It’s a ….. WHAT?~

Tanner’s P.O.V. 
Jade and I were waiting at the doctor’s office. Today, we are going to find out the sex of the baby. I have a feeling that it’s gonna be a girl. A boy would be nice too, but I have a feeling it’s going to be a girl.
Jade was looking through some magazines. As I looked over at her, she looked so beautiful. It’s been starting to get hard with her bump in the way, but I love it. She then looked up at me and smiled. I smiled back.
“Jade Roy?” One of the nurses called her name and we got up and followed her to one of the ultrasound rooms. Jade grabbed my hand as we walked into the room. “The doctor will be right in.” Then the nurse left. It was silence for a little bit until Jade spoke up.
“I’m nervous.” She said. “And excited. I just hope that nothing is wrong with the baby.” I hugged her tightly, but not too tightly. I didn’t want to put too much pressure on the baby.
“I am too.” I answered as I looked down at her. “Everything with be fine, I promise.” She then kissed me on the cheek and sat down on the table.
“Hello, Jade. How are we feeling today?” As the doctor walked in and looked up at Jade and I. “You must be the father.” As we shook hands. Then he went right back to Jade. “Are you ready to know what your baby is?”
“Yes, I’m nervous and excited.” Jade answered as she laid down on the table and pulled up her shirt, showing her belly.
“Don’t be nervous, I’m sure that everything will be just fine.” He smiled at her, then put some gel stuff on her belly. “And do you want to know what the sex of your baby is? Or do you want it to be a surprise?”
“Yes. Sooner I know, the sooner I can shop for him or her.” Jade said and the doctor smiled. Then there it was. Our baby. Once I heard the heartbeat, I kissed the top of Jade’s forehead. She was smiling, almost about to cry.
“There’s your baby. That’s the head. A hand. Looks like she’s waving to you too.” The doctor said as I smiled.
“It’s a girl?” I asked. I had the biggest smiled on my face.
“Yes, it is.” The doctor replied. Then his expression changed. “Wait a minute. There’s another heartbeat.” My eyes widen and I looked down at Jade, she was surprised.
“You mean there’s another baby?” She asked.
“Yes, you’re having twins.” The doctor then showed us the other baby. “He looks like he was hiding. I’m surprised I didn’t see him the first time I gave you an ultrasound.”
“A girl and a boy?” Jade asked. “But that’s impossible. No one on my side of the family has ever had twins.”
“Well, you see, having twins is rare, but not impossible. It doesn’t matter if your family has had twins, you could’ve had two eggs that were fertilized. I understand that this is shocking, but look at the bright side. You both have two perfectly healthy babies.” He explained, then he got up and walked over to the door. “I’m be right back. I’m going to get you some copies of your babies.” Then he exited.
“Twins, wow.” I said. Jade looked over to me. She was already shocked that I got her pregnant, but now we have, not just one, but two babies! I don’t know about her, but I’m so happy! “Hey, I know that this was a surprise, but think of it this way, at least you don’t have to get pregnant a second time.” She started to laugh.
“I guess you’re right. It’s not like these babies won’t be loved any less. I’m just glad you talked me into agreeing to get a 3 bedroom house.” She smiled. I laughed. I then went over to her and pressed my lips against hers.
“I won’t ever leave you. I promise that I’ll be here for you and our children until the very end.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lucas’s P.O.V.
Sitting in this shithole, while that crazy freak tries to put a love spell on me, or whatever, is pissing me off. I need to find this guy who got my girl pregnant. He’s a dead man when I get out of here. When I get out of here.
I got to think of a plan to get me the hell out of here. I need to see her. The only thing that I did have, that could get me out, was my pocket knife, my father gave me when I turned 12. That bitch fucking took it from me. Speak of the devil here she is.
“Well, well, you do look rather cozy in there.” She spoke. I ignored her. There’s no way in hell that I’m going to fuck her, just so she can live.
“When the hell are you going to let me out? And give me back my fucking knife! My father gave that to me!” I yelled.
“Soon, my love.” She then pulled her phone out of her pocket and answered it. “Hey Tanner. So how did it go?”
“WHAT? TWINS? Are you serious?” She was surprised. Wait, she did mention that Jade was going to find out the sex of the baby today. Oh shit, if she has twins, this will be perfect. If I escape, I was take her with me to my family’s old farm house. And we’ll raise those two babies together. This is perfect.
“A girl and a boy? Congratulations big bro! Listen, I’m kinda studying for a big test for college. I’ll talk to you later, okay? I love you, bye.” And she hung up the phone. “How is that possible? I thought that there was only one girl?” She then looked up at me.
“Well, it sounds to me, that my girl has been very naughty.” I said. “Sounds, like I could help you, but only if you let me out of here.”
“Tomorrow. I’ll let you out tomorrow, but you must agree that you will not harm my brother or those babies. They are not yours and never will be yours.” She gave me an evil look. “I mean it. They are the only family that I’ve got, since my parents walked out on me.”

Another chapter will be up on Friday! If you are too impatient and don’t want to wait for another chapter, you can always check out my story on Wattpad, just search my name katieasehl and you will find Unclear and other stories as well. We are about halfway done with Unclear. I haven’t written a squeal, its been in my thoughts, but I will ask for you guys advice on if I should make another one or not. Of course, let’s finish the book first, before you advised me to make another one or not. 

Chapter 12: He’s Coming For Me
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/06/my-writing-unclear-hes-coming-for-me-chapter-12/

 

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – 5 Months (Chapter 10)

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Happy Friday! Here is a another *sigh* short chapter. I’m sorry that they have been short lately. Here it is though! Enjoy!

If you haven’t read Chapter 9, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/25/my-writing-unclear-the-father-is-chapter-9/

~5 Months~

Jade’s P.O.V.
I’ve started to get a baby bump. Tanner thinks that it’s cute, but I think that once I get even more bigger, things are going to be difficult for me. I can no longer wear jeans and the only thing that actually fits is sweat pants or leggings.
Tanner and I have been looking for a place of our own. We haven’t told anyone, yet. I know his sister might be a little upset, after what Tanner told be about their parents and how they just left. Lately, he says that she’s been busy with painting, I guess. As long as she’s busy, she won’t be able to question us.
Today was a big day, though. We had just found a place and we also have a doctor’s appointment to find out what the sex of the baby is. I’m really excited! I hoping for a girl and Tanner is too. He told be he always wanted a little girl to call his own. He also said that a boy would be nice too.
As I finished packing the last box, Tanner took it and packed it in the back of the trunk. Savannah was holding Ricky when I came back in.
“I’m really going to miss you.” She said. Tears falling down from her eyes. We were basically like sisters, after my father and sister died. “You’ll always have a place here and if you ever need me, call me. Ok?” I hugged her and Ricky. Gave Ricky a little kiss on the check.
“I will too.” I said as I let go of her. I then looked at Ricky. “You be a good boy for your mama, okay? Maybe if you are good, Auntie might come over on Christmas Day.”
Ricky had the biggest smile and then I grabbed him from Savannah and hugged him. “Auntie, can you bring him too?” As he pointed up to Tanner in the doorway. Ever since Tanner has been coming around, Ricky really likes him. They would do all kind of stuff together. It was really cute and it made me feel like he was the one.
“Only if you are a good boy.” I said and he smiled and shook his head yes. “I love you, buddy.” He then hugged me back. Then he ran over to Tanner and hugged him too.
Once everyone got their hugs and kisses, Tanner and I got into the truck and left to our new place.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next chapter will be out on Monday! If you are too impatient to wait, Unclear is avaible on Wattpad. Just look up my username katieasehl. That is where you will find other stories I have written. 

Chapter 11: Its A… What!?
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/07/02/my-writing-unclear-its-a-what-chapter-11/

 

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – The Father Is? (Chapter 9)

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Good morning, guys! Here is another chapter of Unclear for you! Now, I won’t be on at all today because it is my son’s birthday and it is a very difficult day for me and my family. I have this scheduled to appear for today. Anyway, I did actually Google if you can get a paternity test while pregnant, which you can, its just really dangerous, or Google was wrong and now I just sound dumb. I think I just wanted to let you readers know who it is so that we can move on from this ‘love triangle’ we have going on. Enjoy!

If you haven’t read Chapter 8, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/22/my-writing-unclear-it-was-me-chapter-8/

~The Father Is?~

Jade’s P.O.V.
A week later, I was finally called into the doctors office. They had finished the DNA testing to see who the father was. I told Tanner that I wanted to go by myself and that I would tell him when I left the doctors office.
I sat in the waiting room, waiting. Why the hell is it taking so damn long? I honestly thought that they were going to send it in the mail, but I guess not.
“Jade Roy?” A nurse finally came out and called my name. I got up and followed her to my doctor’s office. My doctor was sitting at his office chair, with my file on hand. I sat down in one of the two chairs that sat in front of his desk. The nurse then closed the door.
“How are you feeling, Jade?” Doctor Locke asked.
“Fine.” I answered. I just wanted to know who the father was. “Why didn’t you just send me the results?”
“Well, I thought that it would be better if you got the results in person.” Doctor Locke then pulled out the paper and handed it to me. “Mr. James Miles had a lot of drugs in his system that we couldn’t really get a good test from. However, Mr. Tanner Homes DNA showed that he is in fact the father of your child.”
I looked down at the paper. He was right. Tanner is the father. I couldn’t believe it.
“Wait, why does it say that for James?” I asked because on the paper, next to his name, it said that it wasn’t possible for him to ever have kids. “Why did you test them both to see if they were able to have children or not?”
“Well, you see. We needed to find out first if Mr. Miles and Mr. Homes could have kids. Mr. Homes could, but unfortunately Mr. Miles can not.” he explained, but I still didn’t understand. “We do this with every paternity test and if they are able to have children, then we take their blood and test it.”
“Well, thanks anyway, Locke.” I said as I got up and went over to the door. I then looked back at him. “Wait.” He said as he stood up from his seat. “Be careful, he’s coming for you.”
I knew who he was talking about because Mr. Locke was my doctor when they did the rape kit for me. I just wanted to forget all about it, but I can’t. I need to find a place of my own and soon. Otherwise, he’ll threaten Kayla and little Ricky. First things first, I need to tell Tanner that he is the father.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tanner’s P.O.V.
I ended up going to see James, he said he had the money he owed me. I just hope that this time, he wasn’t going to give me cocaine as a payment, again. I don’t do that because my best friend, Thomas, died from cocaine. That’s why I only grow and sell pot. I do smoke it, but since I found out that I might be a father, I’ve stopped. I’ve just been selling. Jade knows because she used to smoke too.
I knocked on James’ door and then walked in. I saw him on the couch, fucking some girl. I then looked at him and he knew that I was going to let him finish first. I just hope that Jade doesn’t come over while he’s doing that.
I sat down at the island in the kitchen and waited. I then heard the moans come to a stop and then James walked in with just sweatpants on. He then opened the fridge and grabbed a beer.
“You got my money?” I asked. He better because most of the money I’ve been making, I’ve put away in the bank for the baby, just in case it’s mine. “Who’s that in the living room?”
“Yeah, I got it.” He said as he reached in his pockets and pulled out $300 dollars. “Here. There’s a little extra for maybe a bag.”
“Yeah, I guess, but none of this I.O.U crap,  I’m not letting you have a tab anymore. From now on, you’ll pay me in cash and only cash.” I said as I took the money and counted $300 exactly. Then the girl that James was having fun with, came in with his tee shirt on and underwear.
“I got it, man. ” James said, taking another sip of beer. “And this is Becky, my girlfriend.” He hugged her and gave her a kiss on the check. She smiled and then went back out to the living room.
“You haven’t told Jade?” I asked.
“No, and she don’t need to know.” He then grabbed a bottle of Gin and started drinking it straight up. He should’ve told her. Before you know it, she is going to find out the hard way. “She never cared, so why should I? And besides, I can’t have kids so the baby is gonna be yours.”
“You can’t have kids? Who told you that?” I was surprised.
“Jade’s doctor. He said that the reason why I didn’t have to do blood work is because I can never have kids. Which is fine with me, I can always adopt a China baby.” He started laughing and laughing. “Jade’s better off with you than me. Just look at me. I’m a mess and you have you’re not. Can I have more pot or what?”
“Here.” I gave him a bag of pot and left.
As I got into my truck, Jade was calling me. As soon as I closed my truck door I answered.
“Hello?”
“Hey, so I found out.”
“Yeah? Is it mine or James.” I had a feeling that I already knew it was mine, but then again, James was drunk and doesn’t know what he was saying half the time.
“It’s yours. James’ can’t have children.” Once she said those words, the biggest smile came on my face. “I also have a question.”
“Shoot.”
“Do you think that it would be a good idea if we were to live together? For the baby’s sake.” Really? I mean, I was going to ask, but I thought that it might be too soon, I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?
“Yeah, if you want to. I’m all for it. Do you want me to come over and we can start looking for a place?” I asked.
“Yeah, meet me at my house in 10?”
“I’ll be there.”
“I’ll be waiting. Oh, and one more thing.”
“Yes?”
“I’m really glad that the baby is yours.” And then she hung up.
I couldn’t believe that I am going to be a father. I really can’t believe it. I was so happy that I ended up beating her home. I sat in my truck and waited for Jade to get out of her car.
“I promise, little one, that I will always be there for you. Always and forever.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Marie’s P.O.V.
“LET ME OUT YOU CRAZY BITCH!” Lucas said as he was banging on the bars and trying to open them, but there was no point.
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch.” I said as I was looking into the mirror. Trying to see if there was another way for me to break this curse. Then it hit me. Why don’t I use Lucas to create my child? I then looked over at him, he was pissed. “Now, I have a question for you.”
“What now? First you promised me that I would get Jade, then told me she killed my baby, and then locked me up because she’s pregnant with some fags baby??” He said. “What more do you want from me?”
“I need you. I have a deal that I want to make with you.” I said, walking back to my spell book. “Since, she killed your baby and broke your heart. I can make you forget her.”
“Here it comes.” He said crossing his arms.
“But, I need to have a child, otherwise I will die. So, what I was thinking…” I paused and then looked up at him. “I make you fall deeply in love with me that you’ll forget her. Then we can run off together. One big happy family.”
“You think that anyone would ever fall in love with a freak like you? Ha!” He started laughing and that pissed me off more. I then came to the cage and grabbed his throat. Lifted him off his feet and then started to choke him.
“Unfortunately, you don’t have a choice. You are going to fall in love with me and you will forget all about Jade. Then we are going to have a child. Got it?” I then left go of his neck and he fell to the ground. “Oh, and if you wanted a son or daughter, I can make that happen, as well. Or we can just have both.”
I than walked over to my spell book and read over how I was going to make him forget about her. All I need is a piece of her hair, which I already had, and a piece of his hair. I walked back over and plunked a hair from his head.
“Now, while you are recovering from the chokehold that I just gave you, I will be creating this love potion that you will drink.” I said as I started to go down the stairs. “Oh, one more thing. You can scream as loud as you want, but no one will hear you .” I grinned and started to laugh.

Next chapter will be out on Friday and it won’t be scheduled, like today’s was. Thank you guys for reading and as always, if you can’t wait for the next chapter, you can always read my book Unclear on Wattpad. Just look up katieasehl or Unclear and you will find all the books that I have written or currently working on. 

Chapter 10: 5 Months
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/29/my-writing-unclear-5-months-chapter-10/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – I Need To Tell Them (Chapter 6)

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I hope everyone’s Friday is wonderful! Of course it is! You are getting another chapter today! Sorry for the chapter being so short. Enjoy! 

If you haven’t read Chapter 5, here is the link! 
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/11/my-writing-unclear-uh-oh-chapter-5/

~I Need To Tell Them~

It just kept running through my mind, ‘You’re going to be a mother.’ All night long. I had called the doctors office and made an appointment the day before. After the doctor came in with my tests. She smiled and told me that I was going to be a mother.
I got up from Savannah’s guest room bed and got dressed. I then headed out to the kitchen to see Savannah playing with Ricky on the floor. I smiled when Savannah saw me walk in. I’m so glad to have her as a friend.
“How you feeling?” Savannah asked and Ricky smiled up at me.
“Well, it’s not the first time I was told I was pregnant. I just can’t believe that this is happening now.” I said as I placed my hands over my eyes. “How could I be so stupid?”
“You made a mistake. It happens. Nobody is perfect. Just look at me, I got pregnant my last year of high school. Did everyone hate me for it? Yes, but the best thing that happened to me, was Ricky.” She said and I looked down a Ricky. He looks so much like Savannah. “So, when are you going to tell them?”
“I don’t know, I though I could hide out here until the baby was born and then tell them.” I smiled.
“You can’t do that! First thing first, you need to have both of them take a paternity test. Then, you need to figure out who’s it is. And when that is all done, then we find out what you want to do with the baby.”
“I’m joking. I’m just scared, Van.” I then went over and pour myself a glass of milk.
“I know you are. I was too. And do you know who helped me out through my pregnancy? The one who kept my spirits up when my family abandoned me? You were. No one else was, but you. Now it’s my turn to be your guardian angel.”
“Thanks, Savannah.” We hugged and then I looked at her and questioned her. “Guardian angel?”
“Hey, I can be a little cheesy when I want to.” She said and we laughed. “If you don’t want to live with James, you are more than welcome to live here.”
“Thanks, Van. I think that might be a better idea, it’s really weird living with him. He always wants to talk about us.” I hugged her again, then my phone started to go off.
“Speak of the devil, is that him?” She asked, I shock my head yes. James texted me.
‘We need to talk. Now.’ As I reread what he said, I had a bad feeling about this.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I parked into the driveway of Jame’s house, well, it will be his by the end of the day. I got out of the car to notice that Tanner’s truck was parked right in front of the house. I took a deep breath and then enter the house.
Tanner and James were sitting, all eyes on me. I closed the door and then sat down as well.
“So, what did you want to talk about?” I asked. Tanner looked right at me and then spoke, “Well, why don’t you tell us what’s up?”
“Nothing is up. What the hell are you talking about?” I asked again. Did they already find out?
“Well,” James said and cleared his throat. “Marie was out with her friends and she saw you and Savannah buying some pregnancy tests.”
“W-what?” I was completely frozen.
“Are you pregnant?” Tanner asked. I looked in his eyes, god they were really cute. I couldn’t lie to those eyes.
“I found out yesterday, but I don’t know if-.” James’ cuts me off. “Wow, Jade. This is a low for you.”
“What is that suppose to mean?” I asked. What the hell? Why is he acting like this?
“Well, coming from a whore, such as yourself, you think that it’s okay to sleep around and get knocked up, again, and then lead but of us on.” I then noticed the Bud Light he had in his hands./
“That wasn’t my fault, James, and you know it.” Tears started to fall down from my cheeks. God, why did he have to bring that up?
“James, enough. Let her finish.” Tanner said and then stood up in front of James. Their faces were close enough, to the point that they might get into a fight. I then stood up as well. “After what you just did to her, I should beat the living shit out of you.”
“You know what? I’m going to get going.” I looked at James, “By the way, I’m moving out.” I then looked over at both of them, “Oh, I will be letting you guys know when you can find out if this baby is one of yours.” I then left. I needed some ice cream and some girls time.

Again, sorry for the short chapter. As always, if you don’t want to wait until Monday for another chapter, you can find me on Wattpad, katieasehl, and finish reading my book Unclear. I also have a few other books that are out on there as well! 

Chapter 7: 3 Months –
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/18/my-writing-unclear-3-months-chapter-7/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – Uh, Oh (Chapter 5)

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Happy Monday dearies! A beautiful day to have another chapter! As always, mature content might be in the scene, I can’t remember. I’m going to forewarn you, this is when the story starts to jump around, a lot. Happy Reading!

If you haven’t already read Chapter 4, here is the link! 
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/08/my-writing-unclear-whats-wrong-with-me/

~Uh, oh~

~One Month Later~
It was a sunny day for once, this week. It has been rainy for the past couple days. Since, the sun was finally shining out, Savannah and I made a plan to go shopping. I honestly didn’t feel the greatest, but being stuck inside all week because of the rain. I had to get outside. Plus, James has been bugging me about going out with him. I want to, but I just don’t know what I’m feeling right now. So, I’ve been kinda avoiding him.
As Savannah and I walked into Kmart, my stomach started to turn, again. It’s been like that for the past weeks or so. Savannah grabbed a shopping cart and looked up at me.
“Are you okay? You don’t look so well. Actually, you look like crap.” Savannah said as we started walking through Kmart.
“I don’t really know. I was fine, up until now. I feel like I’m gonna puke.” I said as I felt something coming up my throat. I ran to the restrooms as fast as I could. Once I got in a stall, that was it. I was puking for the 100th time.
After I was done, I heard the door open and saw Savannah’s high heels in front of the stall I was in. I opened the door and walked over to the skins and washed my hands and face. All I could taste was vomit.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to bring you home? We can go shopping another time, when your feeling better.” She said and I turned around to face her.
“No, I promised that we would hang out, and I’m not going to cancel it because I’m sick.” I said as we both walked out of the bathroom and headed down to the baby isle. Savannah wanted to check out some more cute outfits for her son, Ricky.
I started looking at some of the clothes as well. Then it hit me. Could I be pregnant? I makes complete sense. I haven’t been feeling good for the past few weeks. I’m tired and exhausted all the time. Plus the other day, I had a weird craving for tuna fish and I normal don’t even touch that stuff, but I do have to admit that it was really good.
I looked over to Savannah, she picked out a cute outfit that make me smile. ‘If Mommy can’t get what I want, Auntie will.’ That’s what the shirt said and I smiled to Savannah.
“That’s really cute. He will look so cute in it.” I said.
“I know! I think I’m gonna get it, its only 9 dollars.” As soon as she said that, my stomach started to turn again. What the hell!? It’s only been 11 minutes and I have to puke again? So, I ran to the restroom and puked, again. Then saw Savannah waiting for me outside the bathrooms.
“Okay, we need to talk. I think I know what’s wrong with you.” She then dragged me over to wear all of the medicines were. As we walked by, I noticed that we were in the isle with pregnancy test and prenatal stuff. “When’s the last time you had sex?”
“About a month ago, why?”
“With who?” She questioned me. I felt my face get red.
“With Tanner and then with James.”
“In the same day?!” She said shockingly.
“No, no, It was first Tanner and then it was James a week later.”
“Oh, okay. Well, were they protected?” I looked up at her and I honestly couldn’t remember. I was so drunk that I couldn’t even remember barely anything. I just wanted to cry, but I held it in.
Savannah hugged me and then said, “It’s okay, it happens. If you want, you can stay with me and Ricky.” Then she pulled away. “First thing we need to do is find out if you are pregnant, then we will take it day by day. You helped me, when I got pregnant and I’m gonna do the same for you.”
Then my phone started to go off. It was an unknown caller.
“Hello?” I answered.
“Is this Jade?” A male voice spoke.
“Yes this is. Who is this and what do you want?”
“It’s Frank, your stepfather.” What the hell did he want now? “Your mother is in the hospital.” My eyes got wide.
“What?! Where is she? How is she? And why are you calling me instead of my mom?”
“I called because your mother went into labor and lost both of the babies. She needs you, Jade. You are the only child she has left.” Tears started to pour from my eyes. ” And another thing, we don’t have enough money to pay the hospital bills and we were wondering if-” I hung up the phone. Of course she marries a gold digger.
I looked up to Savannah and gave her the ‘we need to leave’ look. But, before we left, she grabbed 3 pregnancy tests. I just hope that I have a stomach flu and not pregnant with a baby, that I don’t even know who the father is.

 

James POV
It’s been one month since that night. When I made love to the girl that I love. Now, everything has changed. She has been avoiding me since that night. I just want to talk to her. I want to know how she feels. I want to be with her.
Then the door bell goes off. I get up from the couch and open the door to find Marie standing there. I kinda forgot about her ever since that night. She used to send me messages and call me, but I blocked her number.
“Hi, James.” She said, smiling.
“Oh, um hi.”
“Can we talk? I’ve tried to call and text you, but I never got a response. So, that’s why I’m here.”
“To talk about what? Why I dumped you?” Once I said that, it got Marie’s attention. “Really? Why don’t I answer your calls or texts? It’s because I want nothing to do with you. I’m in love with someone else.”
“I-I thought we had something. Don’t you feel that spark that we have?” She wasn’t wrong. We did have a spark that kept me from thinking about Jade. I really didn’t want to end it, I had to. It was my only chance show Jade how much I loved and cared about her.
“There’s nothing. No spark. Not anymore.” I said and tears started to form under her eyes. God, I hate to see her like this. I have to. I have to find out if Jade and I will work out. “I think, it’s time for you to leave. Now.”
She wiped her tears and then ran to her car. I then slammed the door shut and went into my room. I don’t know what’s going on with me. First, I’m all about Jade, then I meet Marie, then I sleep with Jade and fall head over heels for her. Then Marie comes back. Why did she have to come back now? Couldn’t it waited a few more years?
My phone vibrated, it was a message from Jade.
Spending the night at Savannah’s house.
Of course. Avoiding me as usual. I really think that I need a drink because I don’t think I can handle the events of this day.
Jade’s POV
After Savannah put Ricky down for his bedtime, we both went into the bathroom. She gave me the first test and then left the bathroom. God, why did I have to be put in this situation?
After I took the first test, I gave it to Savannah. We then waited the 5 minutes and then she gave the test back to me.
“It’s a plus, Jade.” Savannah said. As I looked down at the test to see a plus sign. “You’re pregnant.”
“Give me the box. There must be a mistake.” As I took the box from Savannah and read the back of the box. She was right, I’m pregnant. “Oh, god.”
“I know, I was shocked the first time that I found out I was pregnant. Then again, you are in a totally better situation than I was.” She said, tears started to fall from my cheeks. She came over to me and hugged me real tight. “I’ll be here for you. There are options if you don’t want to keep the baby. I’ll support you 100%. You can even move in and I can help you out with the baby.”
“Thanks, Savannah. I think I just want to lay down and process this all in.” I said as she let go of me and smiled.
“You’re welcome, just lay down and if you want to talk, I will be all ears.” She said as she then got up and walked out of her bedroom.
I just sat there. Thinking that I’m pregnant, but I don’t know who the father is. I really hope it’s James, but then again, that would mean I would have to tell him that I’m pregnant. What if the baby is Tanners? What am I going to do now?
First thing first, I need to go to the doctors soon. I have to know if I really am. Then, I’ll have to tell them both. Tanner and the James. I just wish I knew who the father really was. The sooner I tell them, the sooner that I will find out who’s the father.
Why did I have to be so stupid?

Thanks for reading! Next chapter will be out Friday! If you can’t wait for the next chapter, find me on Wattpad and search katieasehl. You will also find others works that I have written as well. 

Chapter 6: I Need To Tell Them –
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/15/my-writing-unclear-i-need-to-tell-them-chapter-6/

 

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – What’s wrong with me? (Chapter 4)

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If you haven’t already heard, I will be posting a new chapter every Monday and Fridays! I have had such positive reviews that I figured I would give you guys an extra day for an extra chapter! View at your own risk, mature content is advised. 

If you haven’t read Chapter 3, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/04/my-writing-unclear-does-he-love-me-chapter-3/

~What’s wrong with me?~

I woke up feeling hungover and someone’s arms wrapped around my waist. Shit, what the hell happened last night? All I could remember was that I was dancing with Tanner on the dance floor, at the club. Did I fuck Tanner, again? I thought, but the only problem was, that is wasn’t Tanner that I slept with, it was James.
I carefully moved James’ arms from around my waist, to realized that I was completely naked. Great. I quickly gathered my clothes, from his room, and went into my room. I finally found my phone and checked the time. 5:43 in the morning?! What the hell was I doing up? I tried to go back to sleep but, I couldn’t. So, I decided to get dressed and go make some coffee.
As soon as I walked into the kitchen, James had already gotten to the kitchen before me, again. When he saw me, he smiled and poured me a cup and handed it to me.
“How you feeling, today?” He asked.
“I could be better. I just wish I didn’t drink that much, but then again, Tanner was buying me drinks.” I said as James’ handed me the cup of coffee.
“So.” He said. I knew it was coming. One of us was going to bring it up sooner or later. “What would you like for breakfast?”
Breakfast? What the hell? I was hoping he would’ve asked me how my night was. Well, you know. I went to a club with Tanner, got drunk, and then came home and slept with the guy I’ve loved since the first time that I met him.
“Eggs, bacon, and toast sounds good.” I said, taking another sip of my coffee. James started to gather the stuff and started to cook. It was silent for a long time. I waited, hoping that I wouldn’t be the one to break the silence.
“So, about last night.” James said as he was putting the eggs, bacon and toast on plates. “I’m sorry that I took advantage of you last night. We shouldn’t of did it last night.” He then handed me a plate and he then sat down next to me and began to eat. Advantage of me? I was drunk and I’m pretty sure  I agreed to it.
“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t of gotten that drunk last night.” I said. God, now I just screwed everything up for us.
“It’s not your fault. I should’ve gone with you.” he said as we looked at each other. Why couldn’t I kiss him again? It just felt so good and right. I never thought that he would be okay with it, but he is a guy with needs. “But I have something that I want to ask.”
“Okay, what is it?” I asked as he took a sip of coffee and then began to speak.
“Do you have feelings for me?” I froze in my seat. Shit! I’ve never been confronted before, or like this anyway. What was I going to say? Well, you know, I’ve loved you since I’ve gotten to know you, but I didn’t want to lose our friendship, but your more of an older brother type. Oh, and I lost my virginity because I knew that you wouldn’t be the one who would take it.
I took another sip of coffee and began to clear my throat. “Well, if you want the truth, then yes I do have feelings for you, but I didn’t want to lose our friendship or make anything weird between us. Last night was just a mistake.” Great, I guess I’m going to have to start looking for a new place to stay.
“To me, last night, wasn’t a mistake, but a beginning. I loved you since I first laid eyes on you, Jade. You were my best friend, a person I knew that I would always be with. To be honest, it killed me inside that that creep got to have you, before I even got a chance.” He then took a sip of coffee and faced his half-eaten plate of eggs. See, I knew this was going to happen. Fucking stupid drunk I am.
It was silent, again. I didn’t know how or what to say. I just finished my breakfast and then left the house. I had to get out of there before I say something that I might regret.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Marie’s POV
“Please just answer your phone, James. ” I said, tears falling down my cheek. He dumped me last night, without any reason to why. Plus, he made Tanner tell me that it was over? I just didn’t get it. I’ve been in my bed, since last night and it’s almost noon. I didn’t want to eat or sleep, nothing. I just wanted to know why.
“Knock, knock. You okay?” Tanner said knocking on my door and entering my room. He sat down on the side of my bed. “You hungry? I’m thinking about going out for lunch and I was wondering if you want to come with?” He wiped my tears away and I gave him a small smile.
“Yeah, I need to get out of the house anyway.” I said. “Plus, I was also wondering if we could stop by James’ house.” I got out of bed and went to my dresser and picked out an outfit. Tanner got up from the bed and started to head to the door.
“I guess we could stop by. I’ll be waiting downstairs when your done getting ready.” Tanner said as he left my room. I then quickly got dressed and met my brother downstairs. We then got into his truck and drove to Sandy’s. Sandy’s was like a old fashion restaurant that felt like home. I was my favorite place to eat.
As soon as we got it, we were seated right away. It wasn’t very busy today. Tanner order his usual, Bacon Cheeseburger with fries and I order a salad with Shrimp Pasta.
“So, Tanner. Do you know exactly why James broke up with me?” I said to break the silence after the waiter left with our orders.
“He loves someone else, Marie. I told you he was no good and besides, there are other guys who are better for you then he is.” As soon as Tanner said that first sentence, my heart started to hurt. Why would he lie to me?
“Oh,um, do you know who he loves?” I asked, Tanner took a sip of his drink and then began to speak. “He’s in love with Jade.” Tanner looked upset too. What wouldn’t he just tell me this by him own mouth? I would’ve understood.
“What’s wrong with you, Tanner? Seems like you and her had a little history going on.” I said. Then the waiter came out with our lunch and then left.
“Let’s just say, I really like her, but I can’t have her.” he said and then started to eat his burger. I have to do something, if not, then I wont be here anymore…

Another new chapter will be out Monday! If you are still not patient and want to know what happens next, look up Unclear on Wattpad or search my username, katieasehl. You will also see some other books I have written as well!

Chapter 5: Uh, Oh –
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/11/my-writing-unclear-uh-oh-chapter-5/

Posted in Unclear

Unclear – Does He Love Me? (Chapter 3)

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Good Morning my dearies! Ready for Chapter 3? Well, here it is as our usual Monday thing that we do on my blog! 

If you haven’t read Chapter 2, here is the link!
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/05/28/my-writing-unclear-chapter-2-the-mistake-chapter-2/

*Warning* There may be some mature content. I did write this back in high school, so this isn’t my very best work! I do believe there is a few dirty scenes, so read at your own risk! And of course enjoy!

~Does He Love Me?~

I decided that I didn’t want to sit and mope about my mother. So, I decided to go get some coffee. I ordered the same thing every time, Mocha Frappe. I ended up siting down, at the Cafe, and going through my Facebook. God, everyone was just so bitchy. I really do hate social media. It’s only good for one thing, starting drama. It makes me think of my old high school days, fighting about boys, looks, preps, and trying to state your opinion.
Honestly, I’m glad that I had James and Savannah by my side, otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to make it through high school. Speaking of VanVan, I might as well text her. I was just about to text her until my phone started to ring. It was my mother, again.
“Doesn’t she get that I don’t want to talk.” I said silently to myself.
“Ignoring someone?” A familiar voice spoke and as I looked up from my phone, Tanner had already sat down next to me with a cup of coffee in his hand.
“Oh, hi, Tanner.” I said. Didn’t he get that this was totally awkward?  Well, for me it is because, since I am a normal human being, I respect myself and don’t go bragging about who I slept with.
“Hello, Jade. So, who is being ignored, by a beauty, such as yourself.”
“Actually, it’s called, ‘ignoring my mother because she apparently thinks that it’s okay to not tell me things, such as the truth.” I looked up at Tanner, but I didn’t notice how beautiful his eyes were.
“Well, if it makes you feel any better, my parents walked out on us, almost 3 years ago.”
“I’m so sorry about that. Have they made any contact to you?” I felt bad, knowing that his parents walked out on him and his little sister. I can’t imagine that happening to me.
“I’m here, if you want to talk about parenting problems.”
“No, I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yes, I’m fine. Can you just stop asking me if I’m fine?” God, this guy is caring way too much about me. Homeboy is getting attached.
“Okay, calm down, I’ll stop.” I was glad that he stopped and took a sip of my iced coffee. “The real reason why I came over was because Marie wants to do a double-date. Her and James, and I’ll be your date. James is all on board with the idea.” A double-date?? With HIM?? I just wanted one night of fun, not a serious relationship. Not yet, anyway.
“No thanks, I’ve got a boyfriend.” I lied.
“Really now? You suddenly have a boyfriend now? It was less than a week ago that we slept together.” My eyes widen. What did I ask him to do? Never to mention this! Fuck!
“Don’t say another word about that night. It was a drunken mistake. Just forget about it.” I said and got up and walked out of the Cafe and over to my Jeep. Of course, Tanner follows me right out to my car.
“Wait, Jade. That’s the thing, I can’t stop thinking about that night or you.” I stopped in my path. Oh, god. I turned to face him. God, his eyes were so dreamy. I then went ahead and spoke.
“You need to. It was a mistake. If you want a booty call, go ask the neighborhood sluts, not me.” I then turned back around and got into my car. He then came over to the drivers side window. Was he not fucking done talking?
“Why are you pushing me away? I know you felt something for me, that night. You can’t lie about that.” I couldn’t. It was true. Even though, I didn’t remember the full night, some parts aren’t too blurry. Being with him that night, was honestly, the happiest I’ve been in a long time. I didn’t want to feel good. I just wanted to have fun and being in a relationship, right now, is not the plan.
“I’m sorry, I have to go. I’m not doing this, Tanner.” I said as he backed away from the car and I pulled away. God, why does love hurt so much? Plus it’s also so confusing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I then drove back to the house. James was home, but I wasn’t in the mood to talk to him. I then walked to the shore. I took my shoes off and sat down on the sand and felt the cold ocean water touch my toes. This was my only escape. The beach. Honestly, the only reason why I lived next to my mother, was because she lived by the beach as well.
But, what’s wrong with me? Why can’t I stop thinking about Tanner and James? I love James, but Tanner doesn’t want to be, just my friend. What if I give him a chance? Will it be weird? I know better than that to fall in love. I’ve made that mistake once, and he still doesn’t know. But, what if he loves me? I just wish that everything was back to normal. Mom was single and not pregnant, James wasn’t talking to other girls, and Mandy and Dad were alive and well.
I was thinking so hard that I forgot to notice that there was someone behind me, which, by the way, scared the shit out of me.
“Well, JJ. What’s wrong, girl?” I knew that voice. It was Savannah, my other best friend. She sat down next to me and gave me a side hug. “I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to your party, last week.”
“I know, it’s fine. How’s Ricky?” I smiled. She then looked at me and smiled back. “He’s doing good, but he misses his auntie.” I laughed.
“Well, of course he does! I’m the cool aunt that gives him everything that you can’t.” I smiled, she knew I was joking around.
“Well, at least you want to make an effort to see him.”
“Still no word from Connor?”
“Nope. He never wanted a kid to begin with.” I hated Connor from the moment I met him.
Connor DeVoid was a player and a spoiled brat. His parents would let him get away with anything. He would also have the biggest parties in high school. He still does now, but he moved to L.A., to get away from his duties of being a father. What really made me and Savannah hate him even more, was that his parents tried to PAY Savannah to get an abortion. I knew Savannah couldn’t do that. Ever since we were little, she would always talk about being a mother, someday. She did, and still is today.
After a little long silent pause, Savannah looked up at me and I knew what she was about to ask. “So what’s going on with your Mom?” I knew it. James spilled the beans to her about me being upset about my mom. The good thing about having James as a friend, was that he would never lied about what was going on.
“Well, you know how I moved out 5 months ago?”
“Yeah, what about it?”
“Come to find out that my mom has been seeing this guy, ‘Frank’, for over a year now. And that they decided to not tell me that they were engaged or that they were planning on eloping until last week.”
“What?! Your mother isn’t like that.” Savannah looked as surprised as I were when I found out.
“I know, but to top it all off.” I paused and looked at the ocean to find someone sailing by on a sail boat. “She’s also 5 months pregnant with twins.” Savannah’s month dropped.
“OH MY GOD! Are you serious, right now?!”
“Yup. I found out all of that, last week. That’s why I didn’t answer you very much on the night of the party.”
“Ah, that’s why. James ended up texting me that you were fine, but forget about that, how was the party?”
“It was a fun-hungover-blurry night. I met someone, too.”
“Oooo, details!”
“Well, I don’t remember much, but I did get really drunk and had sex with Marie’s, older brother.” I then covered my face in shame.
“Wait, James Marie??”
“Yes…” I said very quietly.
“Jade!” Savannah shouted.
“What!?”
“Does James know?”
“Yes…”
“Well, for fucks sake! I thought you loved James?”
“I do, it’s just, he doesn’t like me that way and I was too drunk not to say no.”
“What are you feeling now? About everything?” When she asked me that, I didn’t know what to say. I loved James, but Tanner makes me feel, I don’t know…special.
“I actually don’t know.” Then my phone went off. It was a text from Tanner. I forgot that I gave him my number the morning after the party.
Tanner: Hey, you busy tonight? I was wondering if you wanted to hit up the club tonight. No funny business, I promise.
“Speak of the devil. Who is it?” Savannah asked. I frowned and showed her the message. She looked up at me and smiled. “Go out tonight. Have a good time and I promise that I will make a day where it is just us.”
“I really don’t-” Savannah stopped what I was saying and helped me up. “No, you are going. Now, get something nice on and go have fun! I’ve got to go, but I will text you tomorrow for the details of last night.”
We hugged each other and I walked her to her car and then went inside to get ready to go clubbing with Tanner. I texted him saying to pick me up at 7. I’m just wondering how tonight will play out. I breathed and then said to myself, don’t make the same mistake last time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As soon as Savannah left, I took a sip of wine and then went upstairs to get ready. I thought that tonight would be a good night to wear a dress. Hey, I felt like dressing sexy, nothing wrong with that other than people judging you, but at this point, I couldn’t give two shits. I just wanted to get drunk tonight and see what happens with Tanner.
Once I was done getting ready, I went into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of wine and sat down at the island, while I waited for Tanner to come and get me.
“So, someone’s going out tonight, I see.” James said as he came in and grabbed a beer out of the fridge. “You going out with Savannah?”
“Nope, actually I’m going out with Tanner, tonight. Savannah couldn’t, she had to leave because she got a call from the babysitter that Ricky wasn’t feeling good.” When I mentioned Tanner’s name, he froze.
“Oh, um, why are you going out with him?” He looked a little upset, but if he was upset, he was hiding it pretty well. But why the hell did he care, now? He didn’t seem to when he found out that we fucked, about a week ago.
“Well, since you and Marie are dating now, I thought that I should get to know him a little better. He seems like a nice guy. Don’t you think?” I took another sip of my wine.
“I guess. I don’t really know him well enough. Just be careful tonight, okay?” He looked worried and I nodded. Then I heard Tanner’s car pull up to our house. I heard a car door slam. Oh, great. He decided to come in and make the whole situation awkward.
“Well, looks like he’s here. I’ll see you later.” I said as I finished the last bit of wine and started walking to the door. I saw Tanner, who looked rather hot this evening. He smiled when he saw me as I opened the door.
“Wow, you look,” He paused for a moment and then pulled out a rose from behind his back. “Beautiful.”
I felt my face warming up when he handed me the rose and our skin touched each others. Oh, god, I’m blushing so much!
“T-Thank you, but is it okay for me to got put this in a vase? You can come in and sit on the couch while I go take care of this.” I asked and Tanner came in and sat down on the couch.
“Yeah, that’s fine, but hurry up, I’ve got the car running.” As soon as he said that, I found a vase and placed the single rose in the vase. God, this reminded me of my dad. He used to give us girls roses every year for Valentines Day. Even when Valentine’s Day was on a school day, he used to call Mandy and I down to the office and hand us our roses.
I placed the vase on my bed-stand and walked back out to the living. Come to find out that Marie was here. Why is she here? I frowned, but then took a deep breath and placed a smile on my face. Marie was sitting next to James, but once Tanner saw me coming down the hall, he got up and walked over to the door.
“Ready?” He smiled and I nodded my head. We then both got into his car and drove to the only nightclub in town.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
James’ POV
“I wonder what time they’ll be home by?” Marie said as we were cuddling in my bedroom. It was nice to have Marie around. We have so much in common, but there’s one problem, Jade.
I’ve started to get feelings for Jade our Junior year in high school. The only reason why I haven’t told her my feelings, is because I don’t want to lose her or this friendship. I just wished I wasn’t so scared to tell her.
I looked up at Marie and smiled. “I’m not sure, but the clubs will start to close soon, anyway.” Marie then smiled back at me.
“Hey, James?” She spoke after a few minutes of silence.
“Yeah?”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course. What is it?” I asked. I wonder what she’s thinking?
“Well, I was wondering why you haven’t kissed me yet.” Marie sat up and so did I, but we have only been going out for almost a week. I was planing on kissing her for the first time tonight, but ever since Jade has gone out with Tanner, tonight, I kinda just want go to sleep and forget the night.
“Well,” I said, “I was waiting for the perfect moment.”
That was a lie. Well, not completely, but I’m just not in the mood for romantic stuff tonight. Come on, Jade, get back home.
Marie turned and faced me. “Well, how about we make this night a perfect moment.” The she closed her eyes and she came closer to my face. Fuck! I can’t kiss her! Then I heard a door open and Jade’s high heels clicking against the floor. Well it’s about time she’s home.
“I-I’m HOMEEE, BITCHES!” Jade shouted and then tripped walking on the carpet. Tanner was trying to keep her steady, but when Jade’s drunk, that’s impossible. Believe me, I know.
“I’m guessing your drunk?” I said as I looked up at Jade. She smiled and then fell down again. Tanner then picked her up and handed her to me.

“D-drunker than a s-skunk!” She then burped and then rested her head on my neck. It felt perfect. I quickly snapped out of it and looked at Marie.

“Well, I got to take care of her, but I will talk to you tomorrow?” I asked and she nodded and kissed me on the check. I then started to walk down the hall to the bathroom and laid her on the floor. I knew she was going to start puking soon. “I’ll be right back with some water, okay?” She nodded and rested her arms around the toilet seat.
I then walked out of the bathroom to find Tanner still here. I thought he would’ve been gone by now. “What are you still doing here?” I asked.
“We need to talk about Marie.” He said. Now what? I thought he was fine will Marie and I dating?
“About?”
“You need to stop this before it gets worse.”
“Stop what?” What the hell was he talking about?

“You need to break up with Marie. I don’t want her to be with someone who is going to lead her on, when you are in love with someone else.”
“What? I’m not in love with someone else. Leave, now.”
“Not until you break up with my sister, now.” He said as I could hear Jade starting to puke. “She’s in the car. I’ll take care of Jade.” I stopped right in front of him. “Move out of the way.”
“No. She is my best friend, I’ll take care of her.” He looked pissed off.
“What about my sister?” He asked I heard Jade puking even louder. I turned around, so my back was facing him. “Just tell her it’s over.” I then walked into the bathroom. Jade was laying on the floor and as soon as I walked in, she smiled.
“How are you feeling?” I asked as I helped her up.
“B-better, can you come w-with me to m-my r-room?” I nodded and she then walked out of the bathroom to her room. “W-wait, o-outside.”
I sat outside her room, waiting for what was going to happen next. My phone went off and it was a text message from Marie. I’ll answer her later, right now, Jade is the only important thing. When I looked up from my phone, Jade came out of here room and was only in her bra and underwear. She looked beautiful, but I know that I shouldn’t take advantage of her like that. She then posed in a some-what sexy drunken pose.
“Y-you like what you s-see?” she spoke. Of course I did, but I didn’t want to do something that she might regret in the morning.
“I’m gonna head to bed, now. So, sleep tight and I’ll see you in the morning.” I said as she frowned. I then left her room and climbed into bed. Why did she had to be drunk? I just didn’t want to take advantage of her. I then turned my alarm on and closed my eyes.
I started to fall asleep, but I felt someone get in the blankets and on top of me. I looked up, it was Jade.
“What are you doing, Jade? Go back to bed.” I said as she then placed a finger over my mouth. she leaned in closer and said: “Don’t talk. Just k-kiss me.”
When her lips touched mine, it was like sparks. I couldn’t get enough of it. This was the first time that Jade and I have ever kissed. I just didn’t think it would feel this good. I then flipped her on her back on my bed and kissed her again. She would laugh when I would place kisses on her neck. I loved her laugh.
She then started to take off my shirt. I stopped and looked at her beautiful eyes. “Are you sure you want to continue?” I asked.
Jade brought my head down to hers, our lips, almost touching and then she spoke.
“I’ve b-been wanting this for a l-long time.” I smiled and she smiled back. “Now, shut up and kiss me!”
I did what she said to do. I couldn’t believe that I was going to make love to the woman that I’ve loved for 7 years.

Tune in next Monday for chapter 4! If you aren’t so patient and want to read the rest, check out the rest of ‘Unclear’ on Wattpad. Just look up my username, katieasehl!

Chapter 4: What’s Wrong With Me?
https://katiesblog96971617.com/2018/06/08/my-writing-unclear-whats-wrong-with-me/

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Dealing With Being Frustrated

Image result for being frustrated quotes

As all parents know, we are bound to get frustrated with our kids, lifestyle, work, etc. How to deal with it, can be very difficult. Especially, when you are a stay-at-home mom. It’s even worse when you suffer from depression.

I get frustrated. I can admit that. A lot of people can’t.

I get frustrated over little things, that I can do nothing about. I get frustrated over the bigger things that I can’t fix. Sometimes, there is nothing you can do, until the time is right to fix something. Or in my case, money always frustrates me.

Sometimes I get very frustrated with my daughter. I get frustrated when she cries and there is nothing I can do to help her. Do I take it out on her? No. I put her in her crib, play pen, or anywhere where I know she won’t hurt herself. I then take a deep breathe, count to ten and then go back to my daughter and try to take care of her the best I can.

Another reason why I get very frustrated is that I haven’t felt comfortable to leave my daughter with anyone, yet. I bet you are all thinking or saying that I need a break. I do, but with my past history, it’s very hard to do.

Losing my son, is making it difficult to leave her with anyone. I feel that if I do, I am going to freak out, if she were to spend the night somewhere, or I would get that call that something is wrong. The only people that really understand what I am going through, are mother who have lost a baby.

My daughter is 7 months old and I am starting to realize that she just wants me, which frustrates me because I want to get stuff done in the house. I know it’s my fault, but it’s hard to let go. It’s like when your child goes in for their first day of preschool, its hard to watch them go.

Anyway, being frustrated doesn’t mean you are a bad parent, it means you need to take a step back and try different ways to relax your frustration. I’ve counted to 10, that has helped. Closing your eyes, working out, doing a hobby, or if you are in a pickle, closing your eyes and relaxing them to a second.

Meditation is what I’m going to try and get into because of the fact that I still don’t feel 100% comfortable to leave my daughter with anyone, yet.

If you are like me and can’t leave your child, for whatever reason, start with an hour. Leave your child with your spouse and see how you do. Try it out with different family family members and then slowly leave them for more that an hour or two.

When you know that baby is comfortable and you finally feel comfortable, then leave them with family for a night. You just have to get to, not only your comfort zone, but your child’s as well.

Another way to deal with frustration, is to talk to someone, someone you know that wouldn’t mind listening to whatever is frustrating you. Airing it out is a lot better than keeping it in. I know how hard it is to talk to someone, but you don’t want it to keep it all in.

Before it’s too late and then you end up screaming at someone.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Dealing With Depression As A Mom

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A lot of people think that having a baby will bring you joy and happiness for your family. Which is does, but a lot of people don’t understand that there is a lot going on then just taking care of a baby.

I have been dealing with depression since I was 13. It’s been a long rocky-road for me. Sometimes, I just wish that I could just be happy, but having depression, makes you want to do nothing. Be nothing. You are always sad inside and no one will really know unless you talk to them about it.

When you have a baby, after the baby is born, some mom struggle with, what it is called, ‘baby blues’. It usually happens to a lot of moms within the first month of their baby being born. That’s why a lot of OBGYN’s ask you about ‘baby blues’, at your 6 week post-postpartum check up. They want to make sure that you and the baby are in good hands.

As a mom who has already lost a child and just had another one, it’s really difficult for me to watch my daughter grow because my son died when he was only a month old. It’s started to hit me a few days ago, that’s why there hasn’t been a lot of blogging going on.

Not just with the depression, stress and other issues are also on my mind. It makes it worse, especially when you have a little one that needs you every waking minute. There are days that I don’t want to get up, but my daughter gives me the kick that I need to get up and go on with my life.

It makes me sad that I can’t see my son reach the milestones that my daughter is, but she gives me a sense of hope. Just because I lost my son, I can’t get up on the fact that he’s gone. I always know that he will always watch over my daughter and any future children that I may have.

Before you say that a newly mother can’t be depressed, think about this. Have you ever had a child? Have you ever thought of the crying to never end? Have you ever go nuts, in your mind, because your baby is crying and you don’t know why?

I give praises to newly mothers, especially ones that have babies or children with birth defects. I also want to praise all the mothers that try their best, when they think their best isn’t good enough.

You moms are doing amazing!

It’s good to hear a good thing or too. To me, it makes me feel inspired and more confident to shoot for the stars.

But the one thing that I always do, when I’m feeling depressed or down, I talk to someone. Whether it is a friend, family member, or my fiance. I talk to someone. I rather people know what’s going on, versus keeping it all locked inside. As much as I sometimes would rather not talk to anyone, I know that I should.

If you are a mom, who’s struggling with depression or ‘baby blues’, talk to someone or talk to your doctor, they can give you some medication that will make it easier for you to handle. As much as some people don’t like taking medications, I am one of those people, it does work.

I am always an open ear. Seriously, if you need someone to talk to, go to my Contact page and send me a message. It’s better to open up to someone, rather than no one.

To all those moms, you keep doing what you are doing, better days are sure to come.

*If you really need help and need to talk to someone or a medical professionally, click on the link below. It gives a list of hotlines and explains depression in depth. The hotline is there and is completely anonymous.

https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/depression-hotline/

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Struggles With Weight Loss

Image result for weight loss

After you have a child, you still have the extra ‘baby fat’, as people would like to call it. But, for me, it’s completely different. I have struggled with weight loss for a very long time.

I’ve been considered ‘overweight’ ever since I was in middle school. I always got picked on and judged on how I looked that I never had any self esteem to get me motivated enough to really change.

I’ve been brought down by doctors, friends, and even some family, because of my weight. I’ve never really been motivate to find some exercise or a better diet that I feel comfortable changing or trying to do. I was one of those girls that would rather play video games than go outside.

High school, I grew to except it, but I wasn’t truly happy. I didn’t want to be thin like a toothpick. I wanted to lose the belly fat. The muffin top that made me feel like nothing would ever fit me because of it. I would change my clothes more than I could remember because I felt like I didn’t look good in them.

Until, I met my fiance. He made me fell like no matter what size I was, I was still beautiful. He helped me see past the muffin top. After having our daughter, I still have the muffin top. I’m a stay-at-home mom, it’s been difficult to do anything because I’m usually so tired in the morning and in the afternoon.

So I looked up what I could do to help me get rid of this muffin top, and keep it off, for good.

I looked up different exercises and challenges that I could try and I spotted the 30-Day Squat Challenge. I started it last Sunday, but I already notice a difference. My pants, that didn’t fit me, are slowly starting to fit me. I’m already starting to look a little smaller than I did.

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This is the Squat Challenge that I am doing. Just in case anyone is ready to make a change, just like I am.

I’m become proud of myself and excited that I’m finally doing, what took me years, to do. I want to feel what it’s like to be able to pick out clothes that actually fit, for once. I want people to notice me and not just my body size. I want to be able to love me for me.

I just started week 2 and I feel excited to do my squats every morning. I want to see if I can really finish this. I’m ready to make a change, a healthier change for not just my family, but for me.

 

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: When Do You Really Feel Ready For Another Child?

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I will always think of myself as a mom of two. Even thought, my son isn’t on this world, I always consider him, in anything. I hate having to explain to people why he isn’t here with us today.

After having our daughter, I thought that our family was complete. One boy and one girl. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, but its not like that. My fiance told me that he would like to have another child before our daughter turns two. He wants to try and hope that our next baby will be a boy.

To me, my daughter is all I really want, right now. But lately, I’ve started to change my mind. My daughter is growing up and it’s going by faster than I thought. She’s 6 months old and I already feel like her first birthday will be here before I know it.

Having another baby, will definitely keep me on my toes, but it would make our family whole again. Losing my son, I’m scared to have another baby because the next baby I have, might have the same thing my son did. Even thought it’s rare, I’ve talked to mothers who had it happen to them twice.

My fiance is basically ready to have another baby now, if I asked him. Me, I feel like I should wait until my daughter is a little older. Before you start thinking about having another baby, there are a lot of factors that you have to keep in mind.

  1. Finances: If you barely get by with having one child, a second one, might not be the best idea. You want to make sure you have the money to get the diapers, wipes, or even formula(if you are like me and can barely produce enough breast milk).
  2. Space: Right now, we are in a two bedroom trailer. Let’s face it, trailers are small and there is not a lot of room. Make sure that you have room for another baby because opposite genders can only stay in the same room until they are 4 or 5. If it’s the same gender, then you can just have your kids share a room.
  3. Daycare/Sitter: I’m lucky enough that my fiance and I don’t need to worry about daycare or a sitter, since I am a stay-at-home mom. Even if I was working, my fiance wouldn’t let me put any of our kids in daycare. Usually daycare is really pricey. Since I am a stay-at-home mom, I got offered to take care of another little girl come November. So, if you know someone that you can have watch your children, it would cost less than a daycare would.
  4. Emotionally: If you can handle the other one above, this one, is the most important. You have to be emotionally ready to have another baby. If you aren’t ready, you may just want to just take your time before you start trying. For me, it will always be a difficult time to prepare myself for another child, because of what I went through with my son.

If you ever think or feel that you aren’t ready, don’t feel pressured to do so. It’s not just your significant other’s choice, it’s also your choice. Talk to them and let them know that you aren’t ready for another one.

For me, I’m just dreading the conversation with my fiance, if and when he brings up when we should start trying, because I don’t want him to feel upset or hurt if I say ‘I’m not ready.’ My fiance is very understand and supported, he feels that he doesn’t want our daughter to be a only child. He wants them to have another sibling that they can go to high school together.

Always talk to your significant other, talking may not be the most fun thing to do, but it’s better to open up versus letting it all soak inside.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Doctor’s Appointments

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As a mom, we have to go to a lot of appointments for our kids. The most appointments you will ever go to with your child is when they are first born to a year old. Sometimes you have to go to extra appointments that isn’t to your doctors appointment.

About a week ago, we had to take my daughter to a heart doctor, because of our past with my son having HLHS. When she was first born, she had a hole in her heart that have not closed quite yet.

When we went to the appointment, I was a relieved mama. The hole had completely closed and they didn’t want to see her back until she was 2. Appointments, like these, always get me worried because you never know if anything scary or bad could happen.

Today, my daughter has her 6 month check up and shots. Usually, it’s a normal appointment. Except, my daughter is very long, she gets that from me, and the doctor sometimes makes us come back for a ‘weight check’. Personally, if my daughter is healthy and gaining weight, I don’t see any problem.

However, doctors go by percentages on what my daughter should be gaining every time they come in for a checkup. It drives me crazy because she is gaining what she is supposed to, but because she is so long, they make it a big deal and we have to come back and pull more money out of our pocket.

I know the doctors mean well and want to make sure that our daughter is healthy, but sometimes they should just go by percentages because all babies are different. Every baby is completely different from the next. I think doctors forget about that and that they should take that into consideration versus what the percentages are saying they should be at.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Making Time For You

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As a stay-at-home mom, I’m with my daughter 24/7. A lot of moms can’t do it because they want the social interaction. I’m one of those that if you don’t message me or call me, I rarely will text someone other than my mother or fiance.

Growing up, I never had many friends, especially now, I don’t even have a best friend, but I’m not sad anymore because she was very toxic to my life.

Anyway, I haven’t left my daughter with anyone or let her spend the night with any family members. My daughter is only 6 months old and I don’t feel comfortable enough for me to leave her with anyone yet.

It’s not that I don’t trust the family members that I would leave her with, its just some of them do not respect how I am raising my daughter. Don’t get me wrong, they mean well, but some of what they did when their kids were younger, is something that I wouldn’t do.

You are probably thinking in your head, ‘What do you do if you want some time for you if you don’t feel comfortable leaving your daughter with anyone?’. Well, what I do, is once my daughter is asleep, I’ll go out in my living room, listening it, if she screams. Either I will finish up cleaning up the house or I will relax by watching Netflix or playing video games.

Sometimes, I’ll crochet and knit or watch videos on YouTube. Or anything else that I will be able to relax, but that isn’t too loud to wake her up. Some days, I just want to read, but I usually start to fall asleep.

If you are one of those moms that can leave your children in the care of your family, they go get some time for you! Doing it every once in a while, is not bad to do, but if you are partying every night, just to escape to be a parent. If you do that, I’m not judging, but if your parting comes first, before your children, maybe you would’ve thought twice about having kids.

Us moms do need a break. I have one day that I have my fiance take care of our daughter, so that I can get stuff done or work on anything that needs to be worked on. It’s not bad to take a break, just don’t make it more important than your children.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: How To Deal With Unwanted Advice

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As a mom, you will get told by everyone how to care for your child. From your family to doctors to strangers. Even before the baby’s born, you will be told how to even talk care of yourself.

With my first pregnancy, I wasn’t as vocal as I wanted to be. I’ve always been a quiet ‘keep to myself kinda person.’ So, when I became pregnant with my son, I hear about how you shouldn’t do formula or you should use a diaper genie, list goes on.

My daughter, it was completely different. I put my foot down to a lot of stuff. I’m still trying to make sure that peoples advice, doesn’t change the way I want to raise my kids. Plus, we as moms, get judged on everything.

To me, I will take the advice into consideration, but if it’s something that I, as a parent, will not do to parent my child, then I speak up. Sometimes, I can’t speak up to a family member because I’m afraid of hurting their feelings, but I have learned that when it comes to you parenting your kids, the only feeling that matters is your kids and yours.

There are three ways you can handle unwanted advise:

  1. Ignoring  it – This is what I usually do, if a stranger were to approach me with unwanted advise. I usually will nod my head. Sometimes, I do it with family, its easier to do, if you don’t want to make a big deal out or you know it will turn into a giant fight, this would be your best go to.
  2. Speaking up, in a polite way – If you are a person that voices your opinion, but don’t want to offend anyone. This would be more towards close friends, maybe family. Telling them in a polite way, will make it seem not as harsh as bluntly coming out and telling them what is what.
  3. Bluntly telling them straight up – I only go this far, if I’m frustrated. If I have had a bad day and didn’t have any coffee, I snap. I usually will only snap at family, because they have been in my shoes. Plus they understand that they would rather me snap at them versus my kids.

There is one thing that we always need to keep in mind. How we parent our kids, may not be the same as other, but we should respect how others parent. The world we live in, there are too many people judging before they know the full story, but when it comes to advise, we need to handle it as we feel comfortable.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Should You Smoke Around Your Children?

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Back in the day, we didn’t know how bad smoking cigarettes can be. Now, you don’t see any commercials promoting cigarettes or tobacco. Still to this day, people still smoke cigarettes.

Had I smoked a cigarette before. Yes, but I didn’t smoke enough for me to become addicted to them. My fiance smokes and last year, he almost went an entire year without smoking, but unfortunately, he got back into the nasty habit.

Smoking is a very difficult thing to quit, but one thing that drives me nuts is parents who smoke around babies or children. I believe that a baby or a child shouldn’t be anywhere never or around cigarettes.

Some of you may think that its okay, just because you grew up in a time your parents smoked around you. It’s not. Second hand smoke is even worst then just smoking a cigarette. It’s even worst for babies or children to inhale it.

Even when you are in another room or holding up the cigarette away from the child, they can still inhale the second hand smoke. Especially in a car. Rolling down the windows WILL NOT prevent the smoke from getting to the child.

As a mother, who had a child with a heart condition, it’s even more fatal. I’m one of those moms that will not go into a house or car if it smells like cigarette smoke. I was never around it and I want my kids to not be around it.

I especially don’t want to hear or see my kids pretending or wanting to smoke a cigarette. I will teach my children that cigarettes are bad and that you shouldn’t be like someone just because the smoke cigarettes.

I believe that my children should be able to breathe in fresh clean air versus second hand smoke. I’ve lost family because of cigarettes, I don’t want to risk my children’s life just because someone has to have a habit that they started.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Losing Friends

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A lot of things change once you have a baby. Not only does your life change, but sometimes your friends too. They might be excited when your pregnant, but once the baby is born and you don’t have time to spend with them, things changed.

You might even drop some friends in the process. Not because they weren’t good friends, but maybe you were more mature and didn’t want to deal with their drama?

That’s how it was for me.

I have kept so many people in my life, that caused me so much drama and problems, but I should’ve been clearing them from my life and focusing what would be best for my family.

Today, I cleaned the list up, the one person I first called my ‘best friend’. I’ve known her since 8th grade. We went to high school together, had lunch together, but didn’t hang out as much like we should’ve.

We both have been through enough, but I was always there for her. As time went on, I knew that everything I was telling her, my opinion or suggestions, was going out the window. Then I realized that this was who she was:

She was unwanted drama.

Everything that I had tried to help her on, always became into drama. Now, I’m not the friend who tells you what you want to hear, I tell you what I think. She didn’t like it, but knows how blunt I can be.

After all the drama that she’s caused, I had to drop her. I sent her one last messaged and blocked her from everything. She was the only real friend I had in high school, but it was time to grow up and move on. So that’s what I did.

I was getting to mature to deal with all the ‘high school’ drama that she was starting. One after another, I was overwhelmed with drama. Not mine, with hers. I did it because I thought it was best for me.

Sometimes you have to do something you really don’t want to do, but once you have a family, you have to answer the one question that you will answer over and over again:

What is best for my family?

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I chose to do what is best. Not because I wanted to, but because I needed to. It was what was best for my little family.

‘A friend can always be replaced, but family is irreplaceable.’ – Unknown