Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Why I Decided To Fix An Old Friendship

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So, if you have been reading or following my blog since April of this year, I talked about how I had to get rid of one of my best friends because it was too much unwanted drama and stress. I didn’t fix that relationship, believe me, it’s not worth fixing, to me.

I’m talking about another relationship that I destroyed back in my senior year of high school. I can’t really remember why I got rid of her as a friend. I believe it was because I thought she was more drama, but I don’t have a set reason on why I did what I did.

I’ve known her since the 10th grade, but we really connected and became best friends in 11th grade. We had many fights, but always fixed them as soon as possible. When senior year was coming to an end, I ended the friendship. Maybe because I didn’t think I would see her as much? Maybe I wanted to end the pain of losing her as a friend?

The only thing I can think of is that I was very immature and everyone in high school can be immature. What really made me look back and realized all the stupid shit I did and all the people I pushed out of my life, was when I lost my son.

When you go through something as difficult and it changes you. You think of things differently, you rethink all your actions, and you become more mature after going through something as difficult as death or anything.

After my son died, I deleted my old Facebook and created a new one a few months after, I wanted time away from social media. Well, in the past couple weeks, I saw her profile pop up on my suggestions list for friends. I debated on whether on messaging her or not, just because on how I ended things so quickly and without reason.

I’ll be honest, when I finally got the courage to message her, I literally had it all wrote out on my phone, planning on what I was gonna say to her. Deep down, I knew that I should at least be an adult and say sorry for all the crap I caused. All I thought she would do is have my ass handed to me, which I totally deserved, but I was shocked.

I think she was shocked too when I sent that message, but I’m glad I did. She forgave me, something I didn’t think that would happen, but she did. It shows how much we have both grown up in the past almost 3 years.

We ended up telling each other everything we have done within the past 3 years. We even talked about our high school days. I was shocked to find out that she had been thinking about me too, wondering why I got rid of her as a friend.

If I looked back at the only really close friendships I had, the one I had with her, was probably the best because we clicked a lot better that I did with my other ex best friend. The ex best friend, we had a few things in common, but I feel I was more issues and drama because she wanted to be center of attention.

I’m glad I took the shot to fix a broken friendship that I ruined. It felt good to know that after 3 years, we clicked back, just like that. Even now, that I have kids, she still would’ve stayed if I just kept her in my life, but the past is in the past. I’m going to try my best to, hopefully, keep this friendship for many more years and years to come.

Posted in Mom Talk

Mom Talk: Losing Friends

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A lot of things change once you have a baby. Not only does your life change, but sometimes your friends too. They might be excited when your pregnant, but once the baby is born and you don’t have time to spend with them, things changed.

You might even drop some friends in the process. Not because they weren’t good friends, but maybe you were more mature and didn’t want to deal with their drama?

That’s how it was for me.

I have kept so many people in my life, that caused me so much drama and problems, but I should’ve been clearing them from my life and focusing what would be best for my family.

Today, I cleaned the list up, the one person I first called my ‘best friend’. I’ve known her since 8th grade. We went to high school together, had lunch together, but didn’t hang out as much like we should’ve.

We both have been through enough, but I was always there for her. As time went on, I knew that everything I was telling her, my opinion or suggestions, was going out the window. Then I realized that this was who she was:

She was unwanted drama.

Everything that I had tried to help her on, always became into drama. Now, I’m not the friend who tells you what you want to hear, I tell you what I think. She didn’t like it, but knows how blunt I can be.

After all the drama that she’s caused, I had to drop her. I sent her one last messaged and blocked her from everything. She was the only real friend I had in high school, but it was time to grow up and move on. So that’s what I did.

I was getting to mature to deal with all the ‘high school’ drama that she was starting. One after another, I was overwhelmed with drama. Not mine, with hers. I did it because I thought it was best for me.

Sometimes you have to do something you really don’t want to do, but once you have a family, you have to answer the one question that you will answer over and over again:

What is best for my family?

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I chose to do what is best. Not because I wanted to, but because I needed to. It was what was best for my little family.

‘A friend can always be replaced, but family is irreplaceable.’ – Unknown